ENTP Girls

[Dyslexxie]

I've often heard that our best matches are INFJs and INTJs because they help balance us, ground us, and bring us in touch with our more vulnerable sides. While I don't disagree that this may work for other people, I've found that I personally clash with INTJs in relationships. As co-workers they're excellent, and as friends they're a charm, but romantically I find them far too slow to react, dispassionate, and quite dry. INFJs also make amazing friends but boyfriends? I've dated two so far and while at first they're a nice, calm presence, but after the butterflies wear out there's always this major disconnect and a complete lack of understanding that I can't quite overcome. There's of course the issue of burning out really fast which I've found quite common for our type. Frankly, I have no idea how any of us survive in long-term relationships without getting bored, but I'm sure there are plenty that do it and I want to know how!

I've heard that when people first meet me I appear much softer but once I become more comfortable with someone my personality comes out I'm pretty fiery and full of sass (or I'm just as ass, that could be it too). I'm comfortable with who I am, but I realize being female and having a big personality is intimidating and often times people seem to just follow my lead - something that's flattering, but annoying as hell when it comes to dating. I hate always making the shots, always taking charge, always wearing the pants in a relationship. I don't want to be the big personality all the time and it would be nice if for once I dated someone who had a more dominating persona than mine (something that seems hard to find, even when I'm toning myself down).

I'm not really into the dating thing right now, but I'm curious to learn what your guys' advice is on this for the future? What would be a better personality type to tone me down? What is a good match for an ENTP girl? Other ENTP girls (and guys) how do you handle dating?

 

[ZNP-TBA]

Try dating an ENTP guy.

 

[ZNP-TBA]

The two ENTP women I know are happily married to an ISTJ and INTJ respectively. It's possible that you got bad sample matches from INTJs.
I think the ENTP/INFJ dynamic is supposed to work ideally with an ENTP M and INFJ F ( such is my current relationship). I think, in general, T-type females tend to go for T type males only because an F type male can come off as a bit too feminine. This isn't always the case and there are plenty of masculine F type males that happen to love talking about feelings. I've dated an INTP female for almost a year and underneath the more androgynous ('boy brain' , sometimes tomboyish) exterior she was just a 'typical girl' emotionally and wanted a typical guy to compliment her.

 

[Diablesse]

I was married to an Istj - 6w7 for 22 years, he was an alcoholic/diabetic and passed away from a heart attack 3 1/2 years ago. As a result my son has undergone extensive ongoing counseling.

 

[ZNP-TBA]

I was married to an Istj - 6w7 for 22 years, he was an alcoholic/diabetic and passed away from a heart attack 3 1/2 years ago. As a result my son has undergone extensive ongoing counseling.

Holy shit. That's terrible. Sorry to hear that.

 

[Diablesse]

Holy shit. That's terrible. Sorry to hear that.

It's okay, he suffered for a long time and his quality of life declined quite a bit the last five years of his life, it was very difficult to go through and watch, I am glad his soul is finally at peace.

 

[ZNP-TBA]

It's okay, he suffered for a long time and his quality of life declined quite a bit the last five years of his life, it was very difficult to go through and watch, I am glad his soul is finally at peace.

Still, I can't imagine what you and your children went through seeing him suffer for five years. my deepest sympathies though I'm sure you don't need them. It just seems so young to go. I'm assuming you guys were around the same age.

 

[Diablesse]

Still, I can't imagine what you and your children went through seeing him suffer for five years. my deepest sympathies though I'm sure you don't need them. It just seems so young to go. I'm assuming you guys were around the same age.

I can't even attempt to find the words to convey the depth of pain, and powerlessness I felt and the effect it had on all three of our children. We were eight years apart, he died at the age of 48. He was caught in the downward spiral of multiple addictions. I appreciate your understanding and thank you for expressing your sympathy.

 

[Dyslexxie]

The two ENTP women I know are happily married to an ISTJ and INTJ respectively. It's possible that you got bad sample matches from INTJs.
I think the ENTP/INFJ dynamic is supposed to work ideally with an ENTP M and INFJ F ( such is my current relationship). I think, in general, T-type females tend to go for T type males only because an F type male can come off as a bit too feminine. This isn't always the case and there are plenty of masculine F type males that happen to love talking about feelings. I've dated an INTP female for almost a year and underneath the more androgynous ('boy brain' , sometimes tomboyish) exterior she was just a 'typical girl' emotionally and wanted a typical guy to compliment her.

That's quite possible - F type males may be overly emotional and T females can be harsh, so it's an awkward dynamic. I've never really met any ENTPs in long-term relationships so it's interesting to hear, especially that both your ENTP acquaintances are also female and married to IxTJs. Are they older? Age might also have to do with it. I've been told we're pretty rough around the ages in our younger years but get better with maturity.

I was married to an Istj - 6w7 for 22 years, he was an alcoholic/diabetic and passed away from a heart attack 3 1/2 years ago. As a result my son has undergone extensive ongoing counseling.

I'm really sorry, my deepest sympathies for yourself and your family. I hope you're handling everything so far - be patient with yourself and give yourself time to heal.

 

[SearchingforPeace]

Back to the OP, but deepest sympathies to you and yours, Diablesse.

It sounds like you might want another big personality type. Ever dated a ESTJ, ENTJ, or ENFJ? Every male I know of these 3 types is a pretty strong person...... most people say I am one of the strongest people they know, and they are not talking of my 6'5" muscalar frame, though that might help, lol....

 

[Diablesse]

Back to the OP, but deepest sympathies to you and yours, Diablesse.

It sounds like you might want another big personality type. Ever dated a ESTJ, ENTJ, or ENFJ? Every male I know of these 3 types is a pretty strong person...... most people say I am one of the strongest people they know, and they are not talking of my 6'5" muscalar frame, though that might help, lol....

You're funny, I haven't dated since I was 18 years old. The entire concept of dating feels like foreign territory.

 

[SearchingforPeace]

You're funny, I haven't dated since I was 18 years old. The entire concept of dating feels like foreign territory.

Humor is important.. The dating comment wasn't directed at you but Allosaurus.

Dating seems like a very odd thing to me, given I have been married 20 years, one that I hope to avoid for a bit longer if I can keep my marriage together.

 

[Diablesse]

Humor is important.. The dating comment wasn't directed at you but Allosaurus.

Dating seems like a very odd thing to me, given I have been married 20 years, one that I hope to avoid for a bit longer if I can keep my marriage together.

I have been enjoying single life, its been a long time since I have had my freedom. So, I have really appreciated not having to answer to a partner and having my own time to do with however I wish. I have had a couple of old freinds contact me and attempt to rekindle past potential flames. I just wasn't ready at that time. I suppose when I feel brave enough to try and navigate the dating scene I will. Who knows, I might just enjoy maintaining my independance for as long as humanly possible. Marriage is definitely a commitment and a challenge (depending on your partner) and I hope you can manage to keep yours together and happy.

 

[JClassic]

ENTP tend to be flighty and a bit promiscious so your best match would be someone who can entertain your short attention span. I would like to say a good ENTJ would take you on and appreciate the challenge you might bring. But don't cheat on an ENTJ they will make sure you suffer a slow death lol.

 

[chubber]

[MENTION=26046]Dyslexxie[/MENTION], you should try dating an ESTJ.

 

[SpankyMcFly]

It sounds like you might want another big personality type. Ever dated a ESTJ, ENTJ, or ENFJ?

I'd also add ESTP, although that N vs. S divide... eehh, not to mention the Se vs. Ne, NVM

ENFJ, yeah, try one of those. If you do, please document and report your assessment to us

 

[SearchingforPeace]

I'd also add ESTP, although that N vs. S divide... eehh, not to mention the Se vs. Ne, NVM

ENFJ, yeah, try one of those. If you do, please document and report your assessment to us

I felt like a ESTP wouldn't be too compatible. The ENFJ ENTP mix both share TiFe so that should avoid the entire TiFe/TeFi communication mess. Ne Ni is great they should have both enough compatibility and polarity to make things enjoyable and even lasting.

 

[chubber]

I was thinking ESTJ, because the ESTJ would sense and react faster than the IxTJs that the OP mentioned. Or it seemed that is what the OP wanted.

 

[SearchingforPeace]

I was thinking ESTJ, because the ESTJ would sense and react faster than the IxTJs that the OP mentioned. Or it seemed that is what the OP wanted.

Running Te Si Ne Fi vs Ne Ti Fe Si might be rough. They would struggle with the Te/Ti conflict. While both use Ne Si, the ENTP leading with Ne seems to go right against the ESTJ and its TeSi reliance. The ESTJ men I know are not comfortable at all with too much Ne.

 

[Forever]

I don't understand how INFJ males are too submissive? I believe in very equal relationships? Not this one has to be the dominant and submissive maybe my ideology is not popular.
Maybe my interests are limited but if you know how to work with me, I can see going with an ENTP can be exciting.

Honestly both types will have to grow out of their comfort zones but they'll learn a lot if they do. They just have to be willing.