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  1. #81
    Senior Member Patrick's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Poki View Post
    I have an idealist pull when it comes to relationships. Of course, individual ideal, not some general consensus ideal.
    Same here. I was always bound and determined to meet the right woman for me. And I'm certain that I did. (Unfortunately I idealized her so much, especially in the beginning, that I started feeling disappointed and she probably felt unrecognized. But we got past that, and thus I learned that my very idealism could be part of the problem.)
    "Some would say that extended meaningful conversation is a thing of the past. But they'd say it more quickly." (Tom Morris)

  2. #82
    reborn PeaceBaby's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Patrick View Post
    Why "focus effort in growth" when you're deliriously happy half the time and contented the rest of the time?
    I'm trying to see the appeal of growth when you put it like this...
    "Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one."
    Eleanor Roosevelt


    "When people see some things as beautiful,
    other things become ugly.
    When people see some things as good,
    other things become bad."
    Lao Tzu, Tao Te Ching
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  3. #83
    Senior Member Patrick's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by PeaceBaby View Post
    I'm trying to see the appeal of growth when you put it like this...
    Ever see the episode of the original Star Trek series where the crew transports down to a planet where plants shoot out "happiness spores"? Everybody is in such a state of bliss that they forget all about space exploration or fulfilling their mission.

    "Some would say that extended meaningful conversation is a thing of the past. But they'd say it more quickly." (Tom Morris)
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  4. #84
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    Quote Originally Posted by Patrick View Post
    Ever see the episode of the original Star Trek series where the crew transports down to a planet where plants shoot out "happiness spores"? Everybody is in such a state of bliss that they forget all about space exploration or fulfilling their mission.

    Ehh...life is about enjoyment. I enjoy physical labor and mental challenges. That's happily to me...oh and sex. Yeah...that's my life in a nutshell...physical labor, mental challenges, and sex
    Im out, its been fun
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  5. #85
    reborn PeaceBaby's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Patrick View Post
    Ever see the episode of the original Star Trek series where the crew transports down to a planet where plants shoot out "happiness spores"? Everybody is in such a state of bliss that they forget all about space exploration or fulfilling their mission.]
    Ya, I know. I've been married to an ESTJ for 26 years, so I do see the virtues of a match of opposites (or partial opposites) and I tell myself I like to challenge my "growth points" too.

    I was simply joking you a bit.
    "Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one."
    Eleanor Roosevelt


    "When people see some things as beautiful,
    other things become ugly.
    When people see some things as good,
    other things become bad."
    Lao Tzu, Tao Te Ching
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  6. #86
    The Typing Tabby grey_beard's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by PeaceBaby View Post
    Naw, in response to a poke like that, an ESTJ would just call you annoying and stupid and move on. Or "you suck, get better".



    What does averting conflict look like? I thought OA telling you to take a hike was pretty direct actually, not seeing conflict aversion there. She doesn't want to talk to you anymore when you're dictating the terms of interaction without 'give and take'. If you don't think you're emanating a whole lot of emotions about your past, here, you'd be incorrect. Your inner core contains a lot of inconsistency in this area and a great deal of prejudice and irrationality. It permeates your posts discussing the subject matter, and it's a very heavy taint to try to overlook. That's partly why OA doesn't want to engage you in discussion, because your bias leaks out and is often projected onto her posts. It's annoying. And we only have words here to deal with that, and striking up a common ground with you would take a lot of time and energy on her part. You are worth it, ultimately as a fellow human being, but in this venue, it's harder to address.




    You know what's interesting about this? The only profile to contain the word "overreaction" (at least in the relationship section) is the INFP one. Does this mean that INFPs are the only types to overreact? Of course not, as all types have an area of sensitivity and thus the word is equally applicable to all, depending on the situation. Interesting though how INFPs are the ones who must become "calm" and "more objective". Can anyone here say "projection"? INFPs sure get a lot of garbage projected onto the type.

    And idk, I think if I got any calmer irl I'd slip into a coma.
    Sorry, but that *immediately* brought this to mind



    ...and, for our esteemed combatants, @OrangeAppled and @chubber:

    "Love never needs time. But friendship always needs time. More and more and more time, up to long past midnight." -- The Crime of Captain Gahagan

    Please comment on my johari / nohari pages.
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  7. #87
    The Typing Tabby grey_beard's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Poki View Post
    Ehh...life is about enjoyment. I enjoy physical labor and mental challenges. That's happily to me...oh and sex. Yeah...that's my life in a nutshell...physical labor, mental challenges, and sex
    Ehhh, I believe @Patrick already mentioned "happiness spores"...
    "Love never needs time. But friendship always needs time. More and more and more time, up to long past midnight." -- The Crime of Captain Gahagan

    Please comment on my johari / nohari pages.

  8. #88
    Sugar Hiccup OrangeAppled's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by grey_beard View Post
    Only one minor nitpick, and that in defense of the INTJ Armoured Regiment. You had written:

    If you do not focus on something enough to note it to begin with, then you cannot remember it. The idea that a Ni-dom would remember factual details better is hilarious, then.

    *If* those details have been delivered in written form, the INTJ will snarf them up like a computer reading native assembler code. If you mean tactile, sensory, social, details, then, sadly, you are right; the idea of an Ni-dom picking up on significance there is hilarious to the point of farce. (Facepalm over 9,000.)
    Certainly, but then they are choosing to focus on what they are reading. I would bet most N types will still focus on the concepts in what they are reading over dry facts, as far as what will be most striking to them, contemplated, and remembered better later.
    Often a star was waiting for you to notice it. A wave rolled toward you out of the distant past, or as you walked under an open window, a violin yielded itself to your hearing. All this was mission. But could you accomplish it? (Rilke)

    INFP | 4w5 sp/sx | RLUEI - Primary Inquisitive | Tritype is tripe

  9. #89
    The Typing Tabby grey_beard's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by OrangeAppled View Post
    Certainly, but then they are choosing to focus on what they are reading. I would bet most N types will still focus on the concepts in what they are reading over dry facts, as far as what will be most striking to them, contemplated, and remembered better later.
    Hmmm. I think we're talking about too broad a category here; you're talking about the West Coast and I'm talking about New England, so to speak.
    Let me try rephrasing this way. The INTJ *will* remember facts and data under the following conditions:
    1) they fit into an existing Ni-construct (or are of service of extending it), or help building one in a new area
    2) the data are about a topic or person of interest. <-- that latter case, btw, is one of the few cases a generic INTJ will exhibit Se: noting changes in hairstyle, new shoes, that kind of thing.
    They may have to dig for "what" it is that changed, but INTJs are masters of "management by difference", of noticing anomalies.

    Mutating the topic, slightly. The bad guy in Silence of the Lambs, Hannibal Lecter. In the sequel Hannibal it described his mind as something of a mansion with many divisions and rooms and categories in it, of retiring to one room or another to replay memories; of another INTJ who literally memorized whole books and could close his eyes and read them in his mind; another INTJ who, claimed to have remembered everything he ever read (for example, given *any* line in Paradise Lost, could quote back either the preceding or following line); I have read of another INTJ describing their mind like a library with everything on shelves (the "Huey, Louie, and Dewey" decimal system, I guess).

    Is the INFP like this, deep categorization and retrieval, with respect to moral--human worth--values classifications, structured according to their own internal hierarchy? (And able to superimpose others' perceived sets of values, for a time, like the old toy viewer?



    Honest replies only. Snark redirected to /dev/null.
    "Love never needs time. But friendship always needs time. More and more and more time, up to long past midnight." -- The Crime of Captain Gahagan

    Please comment on my johari / nohari pages.
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  10. #90
    Senior Member Rambling's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by grey_beard View Post
    When it's ready to be written, you'll know. It *needs* to come out. (Having written essays of mine own, under internal compulsion.)
    Yes, but in my case my INTJ side has anxiously subcontracted it to the internal INFP, and the resultant internal nagging that results...

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