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  1. #31

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    Quote Originally Posted by highlander View Post
    Is that true? Maybe it is.
    Sure as hell seems like it.
    "The purpose of life is to be defeated by greater and greater things." - Rainer Maria Rilke

  2. #32
    Privileged Sh!tlord ZNP-TBA's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by highlander View Post
    Is that true? Maybe it is.
    Other typology enthusiasts have made this link too and it relates more to the Ti-Fe(Fe-Ti) and Te-Fi(Fi-Te) axes. Ti-Fe are 'warmer' on the outside but 'colder' the deeper you dig into their psyche. It's the opposite with Te-Fi.

    It's true for me. I'm amicable and easy going on the outside. I'm accommodating enough. On the outside I don't seem 'cold' (but not extremely warm), more like lukewarm, fun, and kind of a goofball. But 'inside' I'm calm, calculating, and analytical. Contrast this with the INTJ stereotype being 'rigid' on the outside always appearing strategic and measured with repressed emotions. Inside, INTJs are firebrands and contain a lot of passion.

  3. #33
    Analytical Dreamer Coriolis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by highlander View Post
    Is that true? Maybe it is.
    This is how I usually see this theory expressed:

    INFJ - cold on outside, warm and fuzzy on the inside
    INFP - warm and fuzzy inside and out
    INTP - warm on the outside, hard as a rock inside
    INTJ - cold and hard inside and out

    Yet another set of questionable generalizations.
    I've been called a criminal, a terrorist, and a threat to the known universe. But everything you were told is a lie. The truth is, they've taken our freedom, our home, and our future. The time has come for all humanity to take a stand...
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  4. #34

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    Quote Originally Posted by Coriolis View Post
    This is how I usually see this theory expressed:

    INFJ - cold on outside, warm and fuzzy on the inside
    INFP - warm and fuzzy inside and out
    INTP - warm on the outside, hard as a rock inside
    INTJ - cold and hard inside and out

    Yet another set of questionable generalizations.
    Never encountered these generalizations before.
    "The purpose of life is to be defeated by greater and greater things." - Rainer Maria Rilke

  5. #35
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    Quote Originally Posted by Coriolis View Post
    This is how I usually see this theory expressed:

    INFJ - cold on outside, warm and fuzzy on the inside
    INFP - warm and fuzzy inside and out
    INTP - warm on the outside, hard as a rock inside
    INTJ - cold and hard inside and out

    Yet another set of questionable generalizations.

    Horrible generalizations.
    Im out, its been fun

  6. #36

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    Yes, I agree. I was actually thinking as I wrote and almost commented that such a pairing would be more apt to happen later in life, likely after each had already sought relationships with other types.

    ~true for me (INFJ) and my guy (INTJ). We are both in our late 30s. Both had failed relationships in our 20s and remained single for quite a while. We have been "hanging out" the last half year getting to know each other better (have been acquainted for all our lives) and getting more comfortable with each other

  7. #37
    darkened dreams labyrinthine's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by iwakar View Post
    I've seen this said on this forum before and now I know it's true first-hand.

    INTJs are hard on the outside, soft on the inside. INFJs are soft on the outside, hard on the inside. I'm a little disturbed and in awe of this realization while up-close and personal.
    I think it may be a play of expectations. Because the INTJ can have a hard, external edge, any internal softness is perceived with exaggeration, and the opposite is true for INFJs. I wouldn't describe myself as cold on the inside whatsoever, but I do have a backbone, so I'm not a pile of free candy. I don't think the average INTJ is softer on the inside than I am, but there is some differentiation between internal and external, so that the internal worlds are closer than the external ones, but still the INTJ is more internally distant on average.

    Edit: The idea of an INFJ being cold on the inside is a bit of a trigger for me because of how many people in this world will see a person (infj or otherwise) who is trying to be a "nice" or "kind" person, and so they will hook into that desire as a guilt tactic to get you to do whatever they want. "If you are kind you will do X for me." "If you don't do X for me, then you must not care". I've had to learn to say no to people in a healthy way, and even though I genuinely feel badly for them on my inside (not cold at all), I still have to detach and say no. Not cold on the inside towards anyone, but also not oblivious to when they are cold on the inside towards me.
    Last edited by labyrinthine; 11-01-2016 at 09:00 PM.
    Step into my metaphysical room of mirrors.
    Fear of reality creates myopic morality
    So I guess it means there is trouble until the robins come
    (from Blue Velvet)
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  8. #38
    Senior Member Glados's Avatar
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    Speaking of personal experiences, I have seen it work. My ex girlfriend was an INTJ, we had a polyamorous, very nice, intellectually and sensually pleasing relationship which I am considering to resume after some point, for we had a rational and happily working relationship. She could be quite stoic from time to time but that rarely disturbed me, her diligence about giving herself to the relationship and seeking stimuli to enjoy together was quite fun.
    Mercifulness is not a trait that the weak can possess. The world is full of idiots who like to think that they are merciful in order to forget that they actually are weak.

  9. #39
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    The INTJ and INFJ are very compatible and their relationship has the potential for a solid partnership built on similar perspectives and attitudes. INTJs share INFJs interest in connecting the dots with a focus on the underlying significance of things. But where the INFJ is fixated with the personal (Fe), the INTJ attends to the impersonal (Te). This dynamic is likely to be beneficial in a complementary way with each side compensating for areas in which the other lacks. INFJ in particular can provide some of the warmth and affection that INTJs appreciate but have trouble expressing.

    INTJ and INFJ essentially understand one another and they speak a similar language. They have a vision of the future and they spend quality time together ruminating on the meaning of things and what they may represent for the big picture. INFJs are often very concerned with society at large and various social issues and they may become anxious over what they hear in the news. They pick up on the trends and patterns and become either depressed or encouraged by what it indicates to them. INTJs share a similar concern and they both have ideas about the way things ought to be in the world but unfortunately are not. This however, is what motivates them to go out and make an impact and they both work hard towards this end and they likely will be very sympathetic and supportive of one another’s crusades. These two will love cloistering themselves off from the rest of the world much of the time where they can just be introverts together.
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  10. #40
    Senior Member great_bay's Avatar
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    INFJ and INTJ have the same first and fourth functions. They are half identical but the difference between them is that they have the second and third function in an inverse order. INFJ use Fe and Ti, and INTJ use Te and Fi. INFJs are about foreseeing the implications of how other people feel(Ni-Fe). INTJ are about foreseeing the implications of efficiency(Ni-Te). INFJ, their thinking functions is use to find the faults and inconsistencies. INTJ, their thinking function are about the efficiency. INTJ's feeling function is on how they feel. INFJs feeling function is about how others people feel.
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