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  1. #61
    corona Hawthorne's Avatar
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    I don't think I've ever met an INFJ, let alone been involved with one.

    The closest comparison I have is an ambiverted ENFJ. We were going through similar struggles so our bond evolved naturally through supporting each other. Communication issues and problems with mutual acquaintances kept it from working out.

    The initial pull was noticing that they always kept something of themselves back even when they were actively participating and I wanted to know what and why. She was also witty and disturbingly skilled at making sense of my jumbled up thoughts and rambles.

    The crux of the communication issue was that at the time she was an appeaser and I was excessively bullheaded. Our approaches to solving problems were too different and eventually I started to feel fluffed and became more critical of the things she said. Cue resentment and distancing loop.

    I could try to oversimplify things and distill it down to Ti/Fe miscommunication but it would be a cop out since the real excuse is that one unhealthy party drastically reduces the chances of a relationship working out. Two unhealthy parties and you start to enter the realm of the inhumane.

  2. #62
    breaking out of my cocoon SearchingforPeace's Avatar
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    My brother is an ENTP. We get along amazingly well today, but horrinly when we were younger. He doesn't care about people as much as me, and is much more willing to use people than me. He mostly doesn't not sweat the human cost of his choices.

    We rarely have serious problems today, it just clicks very well and we have great conversations for hours. His biggest issue is that he saw my wife's hostility towards me for many years before I accepted the truth.....
    Quote Originally Posted by Archilochus
    The fox knows many things--the hedgehog one big one.
    And I am not a hedgehog......

    -------------------

    Jesus said "Blessed are the peacemakers" not "blessed are the conflict avoiders.....

    9w8 6w5 4w5 sx/so

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    “Orthodoxy means not thinking--not needing to think. Orthodoxy is unconsciousness.”
    ― George Orwell, 1984

  3. #63
    failed poetry slam career chubber's Avatar
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    in theory the INFJ 4w5 and ENTP 3w4 should be a great match.

  4. #64
    Senior Member evilrubberduckie's Avatar
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    Honestly, most F types exhaust me. They always talk about how they feel and I don't think that that's real validation ,because using how you feel against me is not fair. I cant tell you what you feel is wrong. Feelings dont derive from logic. So, i always clash with feeler types. The ones ive been with dont understand that. Personally, I feel like the INTJ AND ENTP Are much more compatible. I have countless of INTJ friends where we just "click"
    "Advance, and never halt, for advancing is perfection. Advance and do not fear the thorns in the path, for they draw only corrupt blood."
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  5. #65
    Rainy Day Member Ingrid in grids's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by evilrubberduckie View Post
    Honustly, most F types exhaust me. They always talk about how they feel and I dont think that thats real validation ,because using how you feel afainst me is not fair. I cant tell you what you feel is wrong. Feelings dont derive from logic. So, i always clash with feeler types. The ones ive been with dont understand that. Personally, I feel like the INTJ AND ENTP Are nuch more compatible. I have countless of INTJ friends where we just "click"
    This is interesting because in my experience, I've always found the male ENTPs I've dealt with to be the far more emotional ones (especially in argument). Of course feelings don't derive from logic, but we all have them. The ENTPs I've known have been especially good at twisting logic to justify their own emotional states or upset, and not very good at understanding their own emotional states and registering that they're upset. Basically emotion is the impetus and logic is the product. By and large, I've found ENTPs to be very volatile, emotional, and immature partners.
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  6. #66
    corona Hawthorne's Avatar
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    Gonna borrow this gif right quick. Hope you don't mind.

    Quote Originally Posted by phobik View Post
    ikr

  7. #67
    Senior Member riva's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ingrid in grids View Post
    This is interesting because in my experience, I've always found the male ENTPs I've dealt with to be the far more emotional ones (especially in argument). Of course feelings don't derive from logic, but we all have them. The ENTPs I've known have been especially good at twisting logic to justify their own emotional states or upset, and not very good at understanding their own emotional states and registering that they're upset. Basically emotion is the impetus and logic is the product. By and large, I've found ENTPs to be very volatile, emotional, and immature partners.
    FJs arent' the best at understanding others' or their feelings either. They tend to project a lot. This is a know weakness of FJs. A while ago INFJs carried the torch of emotional maturity and empathy mainly thanks to the overwhelming amount of 'good girl' personality descriptions written of INFJs but it has been time and time again discussed and proven that they were carrying the torch of passive aggression, emotional projection, guilt tripping and hypersensitivity that immediately invalidates anyone else's feelings because 'they know' than the torch of emotional maturity.

    Also one should look at the statistics of INFJ females who are either in unhappy relationships or divorces. It's overwhelming. But they never seem to think twice as to whether something must be wrong with them. Because how could it be 'because we INFJs know'. INFJs can learn a bit from FPs. FPs try to truly understand others that are close to them (not all FPs of course) whereas INFJs try to mold them.

    Of course I am not saying that ENTPs are NOT immature. ENTPs are one of those types that take a long long time to emotionally mature. But I think with the correct partner or with types such as IXFPs (I don't think EPs should date EPs which is why I left EFPs out) or SFJs or - like what @evilrubberduckie - with INTJs they tend to mature a bit faster.

    Going back to the topic -

    I think INFJs are better matches for STPs. STPs I think subsoncioussly know that they don't think about feelings of themselves and others enough and that they tend to be a bit too unempathetic with their decision making. So with a INFJs by their side they would feel more filled who naturally think about these things quite a lot (though mostly for different reasons than to that of Fi types). I think STPs would appreciate the moral high ground and the self believed maturity of INFJs more so than NTPs or any other type.
    .
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  8. #68
    failed poetry slam career chubber's Avatar
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    I think @OrangeAppled needs to say something here.

  9. #69
    Senior Member riva's Avatar
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    ^

    She only participates in INFP or Fi related and enneagram threads.

    Actually that's not fair, I once saw her taking part in a thread about the show Sex and the City.
    .
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  10. #70
    The Memes Justify the End EcK's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by riva View Post
    FJs arent' the best at understanding others' or their feelings either. They tend to project a lot. This is a know weakness of FJs. A while ago INFJs carried the torch of emotional maturity and empathy mainly thanks to the overwhelming amount of 'good girl' personality descriptions written of INFJs but it has been time and time again discussed and proven that they were carrying the torch of passive aggression, emotional projection, guilt tripping and hypersensitivity that immediately invalidates anyone else's feelings because 'they know' than the torch of emotional maturity.

    Also one should look at the statistics of INFJ females who are either in unhappy relationships or divorces. It's overwhelming. But they never seem to think twice as to whether something must be wrong with them. Because how could it be 'because we INFJs know'. INFJs can learn a bit from FPs. FPs try to truly understand others that are close to them (not all FPs of course) whereas INFJs try to mold them.

    Of course I am not saying that ENTPs are NOT immature. ENTPs are one of those types that take a long long time to emotionally mature. But I think with the correct partner or with types such as IXFPs (I don't think EPs should date EPs which is why I left EFPs out) or SFJs or - like what @evilrubberduckie - with INTJs they tend to mature a bit faster.

    Going back to the topic -

    I think INFJs are better matches for STPs. STPs I think subsoncioussly know that they don't think about feelings of themselves and others enough and that they tend to be a bit too unempathetic with their decision making. So with a INFJs by their side they would feel more filled who naturally think about these things quite a lot (though mostly for different reasons than to that of Fi types). I think STPs would appreciate the moral high ground and the self believed maturity of INFJs more so than NTPs or any other type.
    Yet i think one of the primary thing infjs want out of relationships is to be understood. Most estps i know are playful but not necesserily a good fit for high N infjs. The same way I can't see myself in a relationship with an isfj. Yes she's take care of all the worldly things but that's what i'd want in an employee, not a life partner

    I mean at the end of thr day its upto the infj so. Just my view for having interacted /dated quite a few infjs
    Expression of the post modern paradox : "For the love of god, religions are so full of shit"

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