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Thread: ENFP and INTJ relationships

  1. #51
    I like ice cream Array Enthusiastic_Dreamer's Avatar
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    Jul 2015
    7w6 so/sx
    IEE Fi


    Quote Originally Posted by Vulcan View Post
    I generally think it's a good idea to trust your spidey sense.
    True that. I do find I tend to get into trouble more often when I put my intuition or gut feeling aside for my version of logical and analytic thought.
    A mind wanders as does the soul

    "The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams".
    -Eleanor Roosevelt

    "I or E: NF or ENTP, you'll always be ARET to me. Ambiverting, Rational thinking, Emoting, and Trailblazing since the 90's"

    Love you Clouds!

  2. #52
    trapped in zoobilee zoo Array Osprey's Avatar
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    Jul 2008


    Quote Originally Posted by Enthusiastic_Dreamer View Post
    True that. I do find I tend to get into trouble more often when I put my intuition or gut feeling aside for my version of logical and analytic thought.
    I've had the same problem.
    Likes chubber, N/A liked this post

  3. #53
    Senior Member Array Nonsensical's Avatar
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    Aug 2008


    My first long term relationship was with an INTJ who had some weird emotional issues due to family problems.

    Pros of our relationship:
    -the "opposites attract" phenomenon; our personalities infatuated eachother. I expressed it more, she was less expressive about it but I knew it was there.
    -When we did communicate, it was often effective communication
    -When she was upset, Fi really came in handy. (it's a relief function for INTJs, I believe).

    Cons of our relationship.
    -oh boy....where to start
    -To put it bluntly: she was super cold and not affectionate enough for me at times
    -I felt under appreciated
    -Communication was bad at times. She had a tendency of keeping things from me that she did not want to deal with. She was incredibly hardworking when it came to her career and would seldom expend energy and time to devote to dealing with relationship issues. It was characteristic of her to brush them under the rug and keep me in the dark.
    -she cared a whole lot more about building herself up socially and professionally than I did. I wanted to focus on US and didn't give a fuck about our social/professional reputation or whatever she was interested in. I could care less about what people think of me/my relationship, but I think our collective "image" was very important to her.

    Reflection: It wasn't a very healthy relationship but that doesn't have much to do with Types. She was very emotionally developed, whereas I was very very emotionally and romantically focused. She was concerned with pursuing different things than I was when we dated (social status, prestige, social image, wealth, etc., whereas I was pretty much just focused on her). However, looking back at the beginning of our relationship and the chemistry that brought us together, I can say without a doubt that the compatibility between our personalities was like crack-cocaine for me. It'd keep me up late at night thinking and wondering about her. I was intrigued and mystified by her introversion and complexity and it literally made me feel "drunk in love". I was utterly infatuated. Didn't work out though.

    I've been dating an ISFP for the last 2 years. We have the same values and desires and I think that weighs a lot more than types do in a relationship. I intuit that we will probably get married.

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