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View Poll Results: So-firsts: what are the dominant instincts of your parents?

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  • Sx-first (both parents)

    0 0%
  • So-first (both parents)

    2 14.29%
  • Sp-first (both parents)

    3 21.43%
  • Sx-first + So-first

    1 7.14%
  • So-first + Sp-first

    6 42.86%
  • Sp-first + Sx-first

    2 14.29%
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Results 21 to 25 of 25

  1. #21
    Sweet Summer Child yama's Avatar
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    Maybe it has something to do with how I was socially ostracized by my peers throughout all of elementary/middle school.
    26 weeks

  2. #22
    was here that's not my name's Avatar
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    Lol drunk

  3. #23
    Senior Member Psyclepath's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by cascadeco View Post
    Well, like I posted in the sx thread, I think a big part of my so awareness and prioritization was my wanting to do my utmost not to be like my sp/sx mother, who embarrassed me in public or social settings growing up due to her being oblivious to other peoples' body language and social dynamics in general. So I had a strong desire to not be like her. (am not saying I don't have some similar issues, as maybe I do, but I'm saying via observation I saw this stuff unfold) Also, my family was for the most part very socially isolated and closed off, and that always bothered me to a degree, and I felt I was 'stunted' and lacking in those skills and awareness growing up. So via observation and preoccupation with that I think I became a little hyper aware of social stuff and relationships as a result. (fwiw my dad is either an sp/so or so/sp, but, I am of a family of all introverts)

    (Also, some context, there was never a lacking in sp elements, I felt 100% secure on a tangible safety and provision level while growing up. Social element was very much lacking, and to maybe an equal degree, sx intimacy and rawness was lacking, though, social was maybe felt stronger by me)
    Interesting. I spent a long time having no friends, and became fascinated to understand the social codes of humanity - as I struggled to bond with anyone.

    As I've become better at understanding the ways of humanity however, it seems more likely that I'm really sp/sx. It's just that I felt extremely alone and desolate for a long, long time and was frantically trying to fit in just to establish some kind of human connection.

  4. #24
    Senior Member Cat Brainz's Avatar
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    For me I suppose I became so dom as I always have felt good from being included with others and I seek security and happiness from being like and respected by others. Being alone and disliked by others is a very deep fear of mine which I think roots from childhood memories of being bullied by others.

  5. #25
    Senior Member Quint's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cat Brainz View Post
    For me I suppose I became so dom as I always have felt good from being included with others and I seek security and happiness from being like and respected by others. Being alone and disliked by others is a very deep fear of mine which I think roots from childhood memories of being bullied by others.
    I'm the same way, or at least almost the same way, about 95%
    ESFJ 6w5-9w8-2w3 sp/so

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