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  1. #11
    Senior Member VagrantFarce's Avatar
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    Socially-minded, without being all that social. It's been done.
    Hello

  2. #12
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    It would seem to me, to make for a good combination. A worldly-ness that grants an introvert a bit of stability, in the sense that there is something preventing you from spiralling inwards. Or being too internally trapped. I can only wish for this.

    Introverted Social types seem to me, to be very good at putting together their own worldview or thoughts on the world.

  3. #13
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    I've said before that I feel SO is close to Fe

  4. #14
    Away with the fairies Southern Kross's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by VagrantFarce View Post
    Socially-minded, without being all that social. It's been done.
    Indeed. I'm practically anti-social in my day to day behaviour. When I'm around people it will come out more but this can be a politeness/obligation thing. I can certainly be a lot chattier than the average INFP 4w5 but it comes and goes. I can be very friendly and sociable one minute, and the next I'm withdrawn and aloof and will wander off to the corner to busy myself. Social situations can be a lot of fun for me or painfully awkward and torturous - it makes me err on the side of caution a lot of the time.

    I think it comes out more in other ways for me. I keep in touch with the goings on in the world; what the current zeitgeist is; what music/movies/books are successful and/or critically acclaimed; current social trends, comparing cultural/social differences etc. That's not to say I necessarily care about what is 'cool' - I couldn't care less about Justin Beiber, Twilight and a whole boat load of other popular things. I just like to keep track of the social/cultural/political temperature and to see how that reflects current events, contemporary society and human behaviour. The 4 So is the social critic/commentator and that fits me perfectly.

    My ISTP dad is a so/sp too and he can come across as very gregarious. He's the nice guy that everyone likes and couldn't think of a bad thing to say about. He's very adaptable and laid-back and can talk to just about anyone. It makes him seem a little more extroverted than he is but he is still firmly an introvert.
    INFP 4w5 so/sp

    I've dreamt in my life dreams that have stayed with me ever after, and changed my ideas;
    they've gone through and through me, like wine through water, and altered the colour of my mind.

    - Emily Bronte

  5. #15
    On The blessblessblessblesster
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    Quote Originally Posted by RaptorWizard View Post
    The internet is a great way for introverts to get connected without the fuss and struggle of social gatherings in filthy public junkyards!
    I figured out I like internet socializing best.

  6. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by RaptorWizard View Post
    The internet is a great way for introverts to get connected without the fuss and struggle of social gatherings in filthy public junkyards!
    Quote Originally Posted by Bilateral Entry View Post
    I figured out I like internet socializing best.
    There's this, too. You sacrifice some real-time interaction, context, facial cues, etc.; but it's easier to find a group of folks with common interests and with enough diversity to keep things engaging. Moreover, a group of friends and I keep in touch in real time via chat almost daily. It's all so convenient.

    Hell, it's the way socializing is trending anyway--toward convenience. Texting back and forth is no different than using a chat program, and even the most extroverted of extroverts are known to love their textin'.

    Lines are being blurred, my friends.
    Quote Originally Posted by AffirmitiveAnxiety View Post
    I dont know whether im out or in when it comes to I or E. It's like a bellybutton of the mind.
    Yeah. Given that there are so many different definitions of introversion and extroversion out there; whether colloquial, Jungian, etc.; I just chalk myself up as an ambivert and am done with it

  7. #17
    reborn PeaceBaby's Avatar
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    I'm an introvert so-dom too. I relate to @fidelia 's post about enjoying people and being involved yet needing the recharge, staying up late to get it (which I always note is so counter-productive for me! ).

    The need for more recharge-time seems to have increased as I have gotten older. Plus, I am losing some of my previous need to really be the grease that holds it all together, be everything to everyone and try to be liked by the group. I'm changing somehow.

    Some of that "need to please" is the 9 in my tritype. I also have 3 and 7 in there, both outgoing energies. I find being Fi-dom and so-dom a challenging dichotomy at times.

    Since I don't relate as much to SK's post as I thought I might, I too am pondering the difference between us being 4 vs 9. Must look some of that up.
    "Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one."
    Eleanor Roosevelt


    "When people see some things as beautiful,
    other things become ugly.
    When people see some things as good,
    other things become bad."
    Lao Tzu, Tao Te Ching

  8. #18
    Away with the fairies Southern Kross's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by PeaceBaby View Post
    The need for more recharge-time seems to have increased as I have gotten older. Plus, I am losing some of my previous need to really be the grease that holds it all together, be everything to everyone and try to be liked by the group. I'm changing somehow.

    Some of that "need to please" is the 9 in my tritype. I also have 3 and 7 in there, both outgoing energies. I find being Fi-dom and so-dom a challenging dichotomy at times.

    Since I don't relate as much to SK's post as I thought I might, I too am pondering the difference between us being 4 vs 9. Must look some of that up.
    Really? You'd think Social INFPs would have more in common (it being slightly strange and all). Like you say, it's probably is a 4 vs. 9 difference. Here's some comparisons:

    Social Subtype Nines work extremely hard on behalf of a group, organization, or cause that they support or belong to as a way of not focusing on themselves. Social subtype Nines are usually very friendly, and their need to feel a part of things is rooted in their underlying feeling of not fitting in. Thus, Nines sacrifice themselves in the service of others, rarely showing the pain, stress, and overwork they experience as a result.

    Social Subtype Fours focus more on their deficiencies and also on earning the understanding and appreciation of the groups to which they belong. They want understanding and appreciation for their suffering and sorrows, and desire acknowledgment for their heartfelt contributions to groups, while at the same time they often feel marginal to or not fully part of groups.
    Type 9: Participation

    In the social domain you join with a group and channel your sloth or inertia into comforting group and social activities. Through participation, you feel included and loved. You can totally forget your own agenda as you fill up with social interaction and activities. In leadership you can be quite selfless. You dispense and disperse your energy into timetables, procedures, roles and goals. You promote the welfare of the group or community through your selfless participation and ability to mediate. You can find a comfortable niche and sense of belonging. Moreover, participation and defined activities keep you from experiencing the inertia or sloth toward yourself. At your worst, you can get swallowed up in the minutia of group activities, and become preoccupied with fitting in. You don’t speak up when you know a better way, because it’s easier to go along to get along.

    Type 4: Shame/counter-shame

    In the social domain you easily can feel shame for not measuring up or being a “misfit.” You feel that your protective cover is removed and that your deficiencies or shortcomings will be exposed publicly. You mitigate your envy through shame. You want to hide your defects and deficiencies, keep your fatal flaws from being detected and avoid disgrace. Your shame also helps you feel or keep a connection to others: “They’ll notice me and my deficiencies, and I’ll matter.” This makes you feel special in the eyes of others. Shame also motivates you to do better – create an elegant image, produce pride of elitism, look unique and special, in short to develop counter-shame and a sense of honor for your integrity and what you do for the group. You may become an emotional truth-teller in the group. At your worst, shame can lead to retraction into self-absorption, depression or despair.
    Point Nine - Participation (the Community Benefactor)
    This sub-type blends well with the style and agenda of their friends and various social groups. The high side is leadership and selfless contribution for the common good; the problem is the tendency to "fall asleep" in a comfortable social role or through indiscriminate activities.

    Point Four - Shame/Honor (the Critical Commentator)
    Feelings of deficiency can be provoked by social situations, with envy directed toward other people's status or membership. This sub-type seeks to establish an acceptable social role, possibly as the emotional truth teller for the group. There is a need to resolve the tension between the quest for individual authenticity and social expectations.
    It seems social 9s are a lot more involved, participatory and activity driven than the social 4s. You get the sense with the 4 descriptions is that actual socialising is not necessarily required. It's more about feeling divided from the group and yet tied to it at the same time. I always think of myself as having one foot in the group and one foot out, which is a pretty unique position to be in (most people are one or the other), and that offers a position of both insider knowledge and yet distance from which to observe and comment.
    INFP 4w5 so/sp

    I've dreamt in my life dreams that have stayed with me ever after, and changed my ideas;
    they've gone through and through me, like wine through water, and altered the colour of my mind.

    - Emily Bronte

  9. #19
    Diabolical Kasper's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Southern Kross View Post
    Really? You'd think Social INFPs would have more in common (it being slightly strange and all). Like you say, it's probably is a 4 vs. 9 difference. Here's some comparisons:

    It seems social 9s are a lot more involved, participatory and activity driven than the social 4s. You get the sense with the 4 descriptions is that actual socialising is not necessarily required. It's more about feeling divided from the group and yet tied to it at the same time. I always think of myself as having one foot in the group and one foot out, which is a pretty unique position to be in (most people are one or the other), and that offers a position of both insider knowledge and yet distance from which to observe and comment.
    9 So participation isn't really participation, it's a desire for it, a desire to belong, without actually ever really having it. A 9 So stays on the edges wanting to feel a sense of belonging to the group that doesn't happen. And like all So doms the Social/Anti-social switch happens. The thing with 9 So doms is they are friendly and likeable so people expect them to be fitting in. So in this respect the two types share a common feeling, for 4s it's being divided, for 9s it's not belonging, and both would be seeking the opposite.

  10. #20
    Away with the fairies Southern Kross's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kasper View Post
    9 So participation isn't really participation, it's a desire for it, a desire to belong, without actually ever really having it. A 9 So stays on the edges wanting to feel a sense of belonging to the group that doesn't happen. And like all So doms the Social/Anti-social switch happens. The thing with 9 So doms is they are friendly and likeable so people expect them to be fitting in. So in this respect the two types share a common feeling, for 4s it's being divided, for 9s it's not belonging, and both would be seeking the opposite.
    Thanks. That's interesting. They don't sound so different after all.
    INFP 4w5 so/sp

    I've dreamt in my life dreams that have stayed with me ever after, and changed my ideas;
    they've gone through and through me, like wine through water, and altered the colour of my mind.

    - Emily Bronte

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