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  1. #1
    Senior Member Mal12345's Avatar
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    Default "Then what does it mean Sx insctint to you??"

    I have no intention of bashing the title question or the person who asked it of me. I really believe the question deserves its own thread. What Sx instinct means to me is to take away some of the mystery behind "who I am."

    I have noticed that some of the people I have found most fascinating over the years have been Sx-dom. Ayn Rand, 1w9 Sx/Sp (who hated going to parties and when she did, she sat on the side-lines as a wallflower). Mickey Rourke, 4w3 Sx/Sp, I have watched and studied his characterization of Henry Chinaski many times. To paraphrase Henry, "I don't hate people, I just feel better when they're not around."

    I may come up with some more examples later.
    "Everyone has a plan till they get punched in the mouth." Mike Tyson
    “Culture?” says Paul McCartney. “This isn't culture. It's just a good laugh.”

  2. #2
    Whisky Old & Women Young Speed Gavroche's Avatar
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    Ayn Rand: 1w9 So/Sp

    Mickey Rourke: 8w9 Sx/Sp

    You're really too bad.
    EsTP 6w7 Sx/Sp

    Chaotic Neutral

    E=60% S=55% T=70% P=80%

    "I don't believe in guilt, I only believe in living on impulses"

    "Stereotypes about personality and gender turn out to be fairly accurate: ... On the binary Myers-Briggs measure, the thinking-feeling breakdown is about 30/70 for women versus 60/40 for men." ~ Bryan Caplan

  3. #3
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    It seems to me that the sx intensity leads to a "love 'em or hate 'em" or polarizing quality. That quality seems to be sometimes (often?) paired with them seemingly being out there in the world, perhaps to the point of asserting themselves onto the world, so people are forced to answer the question of whether they love 'em or hate 'em.

    I hope that makes sense. I don't type so well with migraines.

  4. #4
    pathwise dependent FDG's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bologna View Post
    It seems to me that the sx intensity leads to a "love 'em or hate 'em" or polarizing quality. That quality seems to be sometimes (often?) paired with them seemingly being out there in the world, perhaps to the point of asserting themselves onto the world, so people are forced to answer the question of whether they love 'em or hate 'em.

    I hope that makes sense. I don't type so well with migraines.
    Yeah. I'm a bit like that (that's why I type as sx rather than sp). It's linked with my response to the facebook thread: people can have completely diverging opnions of me, I know someone who thinks I'm slow-witted and boring, others think I'm a genius, some people think I'm the devil incarnate, others think I'm the nicest person they have ever known, some employers consider me the best employee they've ever had, others think i'm rebellious and uncooperative. And well, it's pretty much all true, ahah.
    ENTj 7-3-8 sx/sp

  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by FDG View Post
    Yeah. I'm a bit like that (that's why I type as sx rather than sp). It's linked with my response to the facebook thread: people can have completely diverging opnions of me, I know someone who thinks I'm slow-witted and boring, others think I'm a genius, some people think I'm the devil incarnate, others think I'm the nicest person they have ever known, some employers consider me the best employee they've ever had, others think i'm rebellious and uncooperative. And well, it's pretty much all true, ahah.
    I can further get at what sx is about by contrasting it with myself. While I do present myself to the outside world fairly consistently, I will admit that I like it when I'm approved of by others. It bothers me to some extent when I've got someone's disapproval because I am actually compelled to consider their opinion--I, in general, take in as much information as I can, even from my 'enemies.' I also have a drive to reconcile all of this information (which, of course, can cause anxiety).

    Sometimes, I conclude that the problem requires some fixing on my end, and I welcome it because it makes me a more well-rounded and capable person. Sometimes, I conclude that it is the other person's 'fault' or that we have different priorities. But I must go through the process of determining whether or not that is the case; I can accept when I am disliked, but I do not simply accept that I am disliked.

    I say that I present myself fairly consistently. I also know that I sometimes have a tendency to hold back or downplay how strongly I feel about something (look at all of my "It seems that..." or "I think that..." lead-ins) out of a desire for approval. I'm largely agreeable, accommodating, and unassuming, which people tend to like (I make no value judgment about whether or not this is meritorious; it simply is what it is). The worst thing that most anyone would ever say about me, really, is that I'm spacey or weird.

    There's some "non-sx" mixed with some 6 in what I've said above. But by and large, I'd venture that this contrasts with the sx, who might very well simply accept his own polarizing nature.

    Ah, more migraine typing.

  6. #6
    meh Salomé's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by FDG View Post
    Yeah. I'm a bit like that (that's why I type as sx rather than sp). It's linked with my response to the facebook thread: people can have completely diverging opnions of me, I know someone who thinks I'm slow-witted and boring, others think I'm a genius, some people think I'm the devil incarnate, others think I'm the nicest person they have ever known, some employers consider me the best employee they've ever had, others think i'm rebellious and uncooperative. And well, it's pretty much all true, ahah.
    I can't decide if I'm sx or sp, but that sounds like me. Some people think I'm demure, others, fiery, no one ever gets it completely right. I am simultaneously passionate and apathetic, which isn't always easy.

    I think sx-doms are inherently unstable/volatile/stimulus-seekers. Which is both exciting and a bit dodgy.

    Too many people think being sx-dom means you are an intimacy-junkie. It actually just means you have intimacy issues.
    Quote Originally Posted by Ivy View Post
    Gosh, the world looks so small from up here on my high horse of menstruation.

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by Salomé View Post
    Too many people think being sx-dom means you are an intimacy-junkie. It actually just means you have intimacy issues.
    I know I'm postin' a lot in this thread, but this is an important point. I've historically had issues in the social realm myself.

  8. #8
    i love skylights's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Salomé View Post
    I think sx-doms are inherently unstable/volatile/stimulus-seekers. Which is both exciting and a bit dodgy.

    Too many people think being sx-dom means you are an intimacy-junkie. It actually just means you have intimacy issues.
    I fully agree with both of these statements. I continue to suspect I am an sx/so - and as such am slightly less edgy than my sx/sp cousins - but I certainly fall under the umbrella of unstable, volatile stimulus seekers.

    I also personally have - probably as a further result of sx/so + NF + N dominant - issues with ideal intimacy. The "soulmate" ideal. A mindmate, sexual mate, playmate, and spiritual mate all in one, with a beautiful, driving, life-or-death romance to bind us.

    I do have a certain degree of caring about how I fit in socially, but it is secondary in importance to how I am perceived by individuals and in 1-to-1 relationships. I have more trouble conceptualizing group relations than having a feel on individual bonds, which comes automatically.

  9. #9
    Senior Member Richardsen's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Salomé View Post
    I think sx-doms are inherently unstable/volatile/stimulus-seekers. Which is both exciting and a bit dodgy. .
    I kinda agree with u.
    But beware... This statement can apply too for 7 and 4 people of every stacking.


    6w5(sw5w4) Sx/Sp
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    "Some people never go crazy... What truly horrible lives they must lead"- Charles Bukowski


  10. #10
    nee andante bechimo's Avatar
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    The sexual instinct focuses on attraction and excitement, or, what, apart from the self, seems to promise to expand and intensify life. The life of the self is found in the life of the other. As its name would indicate, individuals who are dominated by the sexual instinct are concerned with sexual fulfillment in the obvious sense of that term, but sexual subtypes are seldom interested in sex merely as a physical act. In fact, a belief that sex is just another physical drive for physical pleasure is a pretty good sign that an individual is not a sexual subtype. Sexual subtypes generally have romantic longings for the ideal partner and hence have high expectations and ideals. By extension, the sexual instinct can manifest in a desire for intensity of many different sorts, but the primary manifestation will generally be a concern with finding the ideal partner, as the sexual subtypes tend to feel somehow incomplete or unfinished without a relationship to ground them.

    On the high side, sexual subtypes often bring a certain passion and experimentalism to their lives; they are generally willing to take risks in order to attain their ideals. Sexual subtypes are also usually willing to sacrifice for those who matter most to them; they have an expanded sense of what constitutes the self and tend to merge with those they love. On the down side however, sexual subtypes tend to struggle with issues of neediness and dependency, as they tend to feel that they need relationships in order to reclaim lost or inaccessible portions of the self. In addition, the merging tendency, when taken to extremes, can lead to an inability to protect important boundaries. And the desire for intensity of experience can lead sexual subtypes to take unnecessary risks, to be somewhat impatient and to grow bored or frustrated with mundane reality. When the overall personality is unbalanced, thrill seeking or self-medication sometimes enter the picture, and can lead to various forms of addiction.

    When the sexual instinct is least developed, the personality can lack a certain charisma and momentum. Such personalities often do not form truly intimate relationships, as they don’t feel driven to do so; consequently, their personal relationships can suffer from a lack of attention. As there are aspects of ourselves which we can only see when in close relationship to others, those whose sexual instinct remains undeveloped might find it difficult to cultivate some forms of self-awareness.
    http://ocean-moonshine.net/e14285736...position=55:55

    As an sx-dom, on average, I find myself either heavily drawn to or heavily repulsed by sx-doms, where the former leads to a close friendship or relationship and the latter, leads to total withdrawal.

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