The sexual instinct focuses on attraction and excitement, or, what, apart from the self, seems to promise to expand and intensify life. The life of the self is found in the life of the other. As its name would indicate, individuals who are dominated by the sexual instinct are concerned with sexual fulfillment in the obvious sense of that term, but sexual subtypes are seldom interested in sex merely as a physical act. In fact, a belief that sex is just another physical drive for physical pleasure is a pretty good sign that an individual is not a sexual subtype. Sexual subtypes generally have romantic longings for the ideal partner and hence have high expectations and ideals. By extension, the sexual instinct can manifest in a desire for intensity of many different sorts, but the primary manifestation will generally be a concern with finding the ideal partner, as the sexual subtypes tend to feel somehow incomplete or unfinished without a relationship to ground them.
On the high side, sexual subtypes often bring a certain passion and experimentalism to their lives; they are generally willing to take risks in order to attain their ideals. Sexual subtypes are also usually willing to sacrifice for those who matter most to them; they have an expanded sense of what constitutes the self and tend to merge with those they love. On the down side however, sexual subtypes tend to struggle with issues of neediness and dependency, as they tend to feel that they need relationships in order to reclaim lost or inaccessible portions of the self. In addition, the merging tendency, when taken to extremes, can lead to an inability to protect important boundaries. And the desire for intensity of experience can lead sexual subtypes to take unnecessary risks, to be somewhat impatient and to grow bored or frustrated with mundane reality. When the overall personality is unbalanced, thrill seeking or self-medication sometimes enter the picture, and can lead to various forms of addiction.
When the sexual instinct is least developed, the personality can lack a certain charisma and momentum. Such personalities often do not form truly intimate relationships, as they don’t feel driven to do so; consequently, their personal relationships can suffer from a lack of attention. As there are aspects of ourselves which we can only see when in close relationship to others, those whose sexual instinct remains undeveloped might find it difficult to cultivate some forms of self-awareness.