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  1. #41
    Secret Sex Freak Hazashin's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mycroft View Post
    Yeah, I'm not really against people displaying any sort of emotion in public. I just think that people should, you know, take into consideration how the way they act is going to be interpreted by or how it will affect others.
    Or people can learn to deal with how others choose to live.
    MBTI: INFP
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    Fi > Ne > Ti > Fe > Se > Si > Te > Ni

    "Forgiveness means letting go of the past." ~ Gerald Jampolsky
    "I am justice!" ~ Light Yagami, Death Note
    "The choices people make tell you a lot about a person, but the reasons [...] tell you even more." ~ Albus Dumbledore (paraphrased)

    Tatiana ♥

  2. #42
    Shaman BlackCat's Avatar
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    It must be great. Sometimes I wish I could just worry about other things other than relationships. Apart of me always feels like it needs to be with someone, to be able to share who I am totally with someone, or else I don't feel complete. I need a huge amount of intensity, and when I don't get this I get very needy and moody. I get extremely bored too, and boredom leads to depression for me. I'm always focused on people and basically what they can provide, what kind of depth that they could possibly have. I'd make an epic vampire I imagine, lol. It's almost like a lack of intensity in my life and great things between me and individuals is like a lack of blood for a vamp... I just start degenerating and going absolutely crazy, getting more and more and more depressed. It's almost an addiction to find depth to things and to have extremely satisfying experiences.

    I see sx lasts and they seem perfectly content with how their lives are going; and don't seem to really expect much from people. And (ironically, IMO) end up in relationships that they are just fine with seemingly. It seems like sx last is almost demonized by the sx doms, but in reality sx lasts seem to lead very happy lives the most consistently.
    () 9w8-3w4-7w6 tritype.

    sCueI (primary Inquisition)

  3. #43
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    Quote Originally Posted by BlackCat View Post
    It must be great. Sometimes I wish I could just worry about other things other than relationships. Apart of me always feels like it needs to be with someone, to be able to share who I am totally with someone, or else I don't feel complete. I need a huge amount of intensity, and when I don't get this I get very needy and moody. I get extremely bored too, and boredom leads to depression for me. I'm always focused on people and basically what they can provide, what kind of depth that they could possibly have. I'd make an epic vampire I imagine, lol. It's almost like a lack of intensity in my life and great things between me and individuals is like a lack of blood for a vamp... I just start degenerating and going absolutely crazy, getting more and more and more depressed. It's almost an addiction to find depth to things and to have extremely satisfying experiences.
    I relate to all of this.

    Except I like my intensity.

    It's who I am.

  4. #44
    Shaman BlackCat's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Marmie Dearest View Post
    I relate to all of this.

    Except I like my intensity.

    It's who I am.
    Oh trust me I love it too. It's who I am as well. Whenever I try to put a damper on it, to "tone it down" I'm just not being myself, it isn't cutting it. I always think of something else I could say when I try to tone it down. I can't not be me, it's such a crucial part of my being to be the way that I am in terms of sx. Just sometimes things really don't work out that well with our outlook I've found. I feel like I have friends, great, lifelong friends, but a relationship partner who is legit will always be illusive and will be one out of the billions on this earth. And I'm always zeroing in on the traits that I see as being ideal in other people whether I know it or not.
    () 9w8-3w4-7w6 tritype.

    sCueI (primary Inquisition)

  5. #45
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    Quote Originally Posted by BlackCat View Post
    Oh trust me I love it too. It's who I am as well. Whenever I try to put a damper on it, to "tone it down" I'm just not being myself, it isn't cutting it. I always think of something else I could say when I try to tone it down. I can't not be me, it's such a crucial part of my being to be the way that I am in terms of sx. Just sometimes things really don't work out that well with our outlook I've found. I feel like I have friends, great, lifelong friends, but a relationship partner who is legit will always be illusive and will be one out of the billions on this earth. And I'm always zeroing in on the traits that I see as being ideal in other people whether I know it or not.
    Yep, I feel your pain, bro.

  6. #46
    pathwise dependent FDG's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BlackCat View Post
    I see sx lasts and they seem perfectly content with how their lives are going; and don't seem to really expect much from people. And (ironically, IMO) end up in relationships that they are just fine with seemingly. It seems like sx last is almost demonized by the sx doms, but in reality sx lasts seem to lead very happy lives the most consistently.
    I highly doubt that. I know two "successful" so/sp, and living their lives would totally kill me - so boring. They're also often asking themselves why they can't get a girlfriend - and I know exactly why. Of course, you can't have it all, but I really don't envy them.
    ENTj 7-3-8 sx/sp

  7. #47
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    Quote Originally Posted by FDG View Post
    I highly doubt that. I know two "successful" so/sp, and living their lives would totally kill me - so boring. They're also often asking themselves why they can't get a girlfriend - and I know exactly why. Of course, you can't have it all, but I really don't envy them.
    Yeah, when I was sixteen when people asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up, I said I wanted to be interesting. Boring traditional method of success is not for me, flea.

    And I can't fathom being an adult and not knowing how to get a boyfriend or girlfriend.

  8. #48
    @.~*virinaĉo*~.@ Totenkindly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BlackCat View Post
    It must be great. Sometimes I wish I could just worry about other things other than relationships. Apart of me always feels like it needs to be with someone, to be able to share who I am totally with someone, or else I don't feel complete. I need a huge amount of intensity, and when I don't get this I get very needy and moody. I get extremely bored too, and boredom leads to depression for me. I'm always focused on people and basically what they can provide, what kind of depth that they could possibly have. I'd make an epic vampire I imagine, lol. It's almost like a lack of intensity in my life and great things between me and individuals is like a lack of blood for a vamp... I just start degenerating and going absolutely crazy, getting more and more and more depressed. It's almost an addiction to find depth to things and to have extremely satisfying experiences.
    yeah. When I read the last few days of matches with the online dating thing, I was just, "gaaaa." Lots of great guys, but almost none who gave me any sort of charge when I read what they had written. Boring and then depressing. My Ne "hopefulness" ("What's around the river bend?") is constantly battling with the depth of need of the intimacy/charge desire, which seems too large to ever be satiated ("I'll never find anyone who will be able and willing to go as deep as I need").

    My autonomy sense also battles with it. Last night when I was walking, I felt like I kept orbiting around and around -- feeling completely alone in the world because there was no way I think I can ever meet someone who can connect with me to the depth I desire, yet then saying, "Why do I need anyone? I'm free to do what I want, I can take care of myself, I don't 'need' anyone to survive, I'll be fine," and then ten seconds later feeling alone in the universe again and finding it almost unendurable, and then back around AGAIN... and AGAIN... and AGAIN. Makes my head spin sometimes.

    I wish I was satisfied with less. The craving only seems to bring disappointment. I'm not sure why people can't find SOME kind of lover/partner, it seems pretty easy if you just put yourself out there and have some level of social skills; it's simply that I'm not happy at all in relationships that are not very far from surface. That's why many of the guy profiles were excruciating for me to read; they're much more focused on tangible, physical measures of sucess and seem content with that.
    "Hey Capa -- We're only stardust." ~ "Sunshine"

    “Pleasure to me is wonder—the unexplored, the unexpected, the thing that is hidden and the changeless thing that lurks behind superficial mutability. To trace the remote in the immediate; the eternal in the ephemeral; the past in the present; the infinite in the finite; these are to me the springs of delight and beauty.” ~ H.P. Lovecraft

  9. #49
    Away with the fairies Southern Kross's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BlackCat View Post
    It must be great. Sometimes I wish I could just worry about other things other than relationships. Apart of me always feels like it needs to be with someone, to be able to share who I am totally with someone, or else I don't feel complete. I need a huge amount of intensity, and when I don't get this I get very needy and moody. I get extremely bored too, and boredom leads to depression for me. I'm always focused on people and basically what they can provide, what kind of depth that they could possibly have. I'd make an epic vampire I imagine, lol. It's almost like a lack of intensity in my life and great things between me and individuals is like a lack of blood for a vamp... I just start degenerating and going absolutely crazy, getting more and more and more depressed. It's almost an addiction to find depth to things and to have extremely satisfying experiences.

    I see sx lasts and they seem perfectly content with how their lives are going; and don't seem to really expect much from people. And (ironically, IMO) end up in relationships that they are just fine with seemingly. It seems like sx last is almost demonized by the sx doms, but in reality sx lasts seem to lead very happy lives the most consistently.
    I confess sx-firsts do seem wound a little too tightly to me and appear easily stressed. I'm more go with the flow and will just shrug my shoulders at things that other people get rather worked up over. I think this projects the sort of serenity that you are talking about; however it can be a superficial kind. It's important to me not to make waves and let the inner turbulence surface too much, so I will usually smile and be pleasant even when I'm feeling upset or uneasy. However, this can also work to subdue the inner emotions a fair amount (eg. feigning that I'm coping can make it easier to cope). Even so, I would say we can seem happier than we really are - only instead of a desperate longing for the things I desire, I experience more of a lingering emptiness that I wish to fill.
    INFP 4w5 so/sp

    I've dreamt in my life dreams that have stayed with me ever after, and changed my ideas;
    they've gone through and through me, like wine through water, and altered the colour of my mind.

    - Emily Bronte

  10. #50
    brainheart
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    Quote Originally Posted by BlackCat View Post
    It must be great. Sometimes I wish I could just worry about other things other than relationships. Apart of me always feels like it needs to be with someone, to be able to share who I am totally with someone, or else I don't feel complete. I need a huge amount of intensity, and when I don't get this I get very needy and moody. I get extremely bored too, and boredom leads to depression for me. I'm always focused on people and basically what they can provide, what kind of depth that they could possibly have. I'd make an epic vampire I imagine, lol. It's almost like a lack of intensity in my life and great things between me and individuals is like a lack of blood for a vamp... I just start degenerating and going absolutely crazy, getting more and more and more depressed. It's almost an addiction to find depth to things and to have extremely satisfying experiences.

    I see sx lasts and they seem perfectly content with how their lives are going; and don't seem to really expect much from people. And (ironically, IMO) end up in relationships that they are just fine with seemingly. It seems like sx last is almost demonized by the sx doms, but in reality sx lasts seem to lead very happy lives the most consistently.
    So... what. You worry about belonging/status/the community instead or your financial situation/job/health? You think people who worry about these things are more content? It's just a different hang up, that's all.

    I don't demonize those with sx last, I just have difficulty finding a way to interact, or stuff that we have in common. I like feeling something strong when I interact with someone; if I don't feel that, I withdraw or move on. But I know what you mean. I get disenchanted and if I don't have something to light me up, I get pretty blah and depressed, too. I need to get out of my current malaise, but the trick is how do I do that without chucking the good as well as the bad?

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