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  1. #41
    4x9 cascadeco's Avatar
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    I wrote this in another thread last week, but I really have no motivation to join groups or be part of any organization, for the sake of being part of the group or working towards a common team vision.

    If I join a group (and past attempts were very short-lived), it is with the sole desire/hope of meeting someone in that group who I really like and who I could start becoming close to and build a relationship with outside of the group. Therefore, if I join a group, and meet someone I really like, I'd then cease having any motivation to continue with the group activity. I guess I do not derive any enjoyment or personal fulfillment out of interacting with a variety of people, not building upon those relationships or REALLY feeling close to anyone, going home, calling it a day and being content, and then repeating that the following week we meet up.

    Without fail I end up feeling even worse and more lonely if I do a group thing and then don't feel I really jive with anyone/there's no potential for jiving in a 1:1 way.
    "...On and on and on and on he strode, far out over the sands, singing wildly to the sea, crying to greet the advent of the life that had cried to him." - James Joyce

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  2. #42
    Senior Member typologywhore's Avatar
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    Greatly enjoyed reading everyone's responses.

    was wondering about a certain difference in outlook bw So-lasts and other types. my own sense [as an sx-so] is that i absolutely want to have an effect on wider society. took me a while to realise this, as for a while i was just stuck at "ahahawat like 95% of mainstream society is shit lol why is no one talking about this", but then progressed to figuring out that i want to be involved in actively OPPOSING society/its questionable assumptions/shitty values/prejudices/general fuck-up-ery and so on (lol)

    There's a sense of wanting 2 be on a public platform stage. i wanna shock people, challenge people, fuck shit up, smash the system, all that jazz - there's certain strains of "notice me, bitches!" and "i wanna be in/famous" in there as well. i wanna unite with other people who living on the fringes of acceptability & allowability, other ppl who are fierce & uncompromising & angry - if we all march together, we'll be strong; if we shoutyellscreamchant together, our voices will have to be heard. so there's that sort of vision of/desire for a place in the wider scheme of things, [perhaps on a national/international/even global level?]. Does that sort of concern w "society" as a whole & the way it works/isn't working seem like a [key] difference between between types with So in their stackings, and So-lasts? Or have i misunderstood/misconstrued/simplified/whatever? XD

  3. #43
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    It's being like say half of the shy and retiring forum who are afraid to confront the real world and all of its amazing challenges.

  4. #44
    Senior Member The Great One's Avatar
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    I feel very confused right now, because I feel as thought none of my variants are neglected. However, I seem to be Self preservation first.

  5. #45

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    I misread this thread title as what's it like to be a socialist and was excited for a moment. Imagine my disappointment when I realised what it really said.

    <-- Disappointed Lark.

  6. #46
    Senior Member pinkgraffiti's Avatar
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    I don't know, I just don't think I care that much for social "rules". I mean, I think first-handedly about any rule someone tries to impose on me, and if I don't like it, I don't comply with it, even if everyone else does.
    Also, I don't like manipulative schemes, forming "us against them" groups, etc. I go in the direct and honest way.

  7. #47
    Senior Member Entropic's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jennifer View Post
    That's definitely how I feel. I just wrote in my blog this week that I didn't realize I actually had a SO place in my workplace until I stepped back and observed. People actually include me, say hi to me from across the room and the hall, invite me to gatherings... but I wasn't even aware of it because it didn't really fill any core drives. All that can be happening, but I can still feel very alone and unhappy, if I'm not making personal one-on-one connections with people.
    lmao, I relate to this. People often say hi to me I guess but I'm like "hiii!" *sees person I like to be around* Oh hey you, let's talk! and I leave the other people completely in the dark haha. It just doesn't concern me to kind of... build bonds this way.

    And then if I see the same person talking to several people but me I'm like ;( y u no talk to me moar? Something I'm very frustrated with currently at my job because there's one person I'm interested in but the work we're performing doesn't really help to build social interaction much. He's probably so first though. He's sure more chatty to everyone and their mother compared to myself. If I don't know the person and I don't know what to talk about because I don't know if we share anything in common (even if it means that we work with the same stuff) I don't talk to them. In group conversations I tend to be very silent and more of a listener. I'm very chatty when I engage people one-on-one though and you hit one of my sweet spots because it's a subject I'm really passionte about. Then I can ramble on all day.

    But to actually answer the OP's question as sx/sp and a 5, I'm aggressive, competetive and blunt and I pay little attention to the social world around me. Making an analogy to Scrooge or the Grinch is probably not too far off, actually. I'm extremely oblivious to all things social (and Fe). News? What news? Harlem Shake? Why should I be concerned? I think what really is the perfect way to understand that I'm so last is that I used to study a master program in global studies though, YES, global studies. Let me copy paste for you from wikipedia because it's a pretty broad program:

    Global studies, in its broadest definition is the academic study of political, economic, social and cultural relationships of the world. Furthermore, it can also include the study of political and cultural processes, the impacts of globalisation, markets and communications. Global Studies incorporates transnational and local trends in its curriculum. Undertaking a global studies course can also include field work or research in a particular area of interest.

    Global studies can also be referred to as world studies, international studies or international education. However, international education can also refer to the development of educational institutions internationally.
    How did I end up studying this? Because I love social anthropology and I wanted to continue studying anthropology. However, after a while I noticed that global studies is not for me because I have no passion or drive to save starving children in Africa or build a greater social community in Bangladesh. I care but it's very supreficial care. The only way I even pay notice to world news or events is if they tend to overlap with my primary areas of interest such as copyright laws. Even then, my attitude is quite nonchalant. In contrast, I looked around and I saw my classmates all burning for obvious social issues. I felt alienated for sure because I only care about my little special expertise and what directly interests me.

    Instead, what drives me as a person are always one-on-one connections. I feel intimately starved, emotionally starved, if I cannot discuss things I'm passionate about with other people, ideally one-on-one but very small groups work too. It's very frustrating as an overall experience and I can feel lonely as a result even. And once I get that, it's also very hard to glue away. It feels frustrating to pull myself away. I need more, I crave more, I desire more. If the interaction also wanes I feel equally frustrated because it's akin to someone who offered me a cake piece and then ate the entire cake himself.

    I was waiting for the day you and I would meet.

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  8. #48
    Senior Member Entropic's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by darling devotee View Post
    Greatly enjoyed reading everyone's responses.

    was wondering about a certain difference in outlook bw So-lasts and other types. my own sense [as an sx-so] is that i absolutely want to have an effect on wider society. took me a while to realise this, as for a while i was just stuck at "ahahawat like 95% of mainstream society is shit lol why is no one talking about this", but then progressed to figuring out that i want to be involved in actively OPPOSING society/its questionable assumptions/shitty values/prejudices/general fuck-up-ery and so on (lol)

    There's a sense of wanting 2 be on a public platform stage. i wanna shock people, challenge people, fuck shit up, smash the system, all that jazz - there's certain strains of "notice me, bitches!" and "i wanna be in/famous" in there as well. i wanna unite with other people who living on the fringes of acceptability & allowability, other ppl who are fierce & uncompromising & angry - if we all march together, we'll be strong; if we shoutyellscreamchant together, our voices will have to be heard. so there's that sort of vision of/desire for a place in the wider scheme of things, [perhaps on a national/international/even global level?]. Does that sort of concern w "society" as a whole & the way it works/isn't working seem like a [key] difference between between types with So in their stackings, and So-lasts? Or have i misunderstood/misconstrued/simplified/whatever? XD
    Ah, thanks for sharing this. Very interesting to read an sx/so's point of view as opposed to my sx/sp. I mean, I have those ideas but they are more vague. Smash the system, ok, I guess I can rant a bit about why I think society is fucked but at the end of day it's jus secondary to me compared talking to why I think this subject is awesome just between the two of us and fulfilling my own needs. But you raise a good point about how so can also take the form of counter-social culture, just like sx and sp can take the form of counter-sexual culture and self-preservation-counter culture although I'm quite uncertain how the latter would appear as.

    I know that for me though, sx first counter-culture is very like "I don't give two shits if you think sex is all that sells" and "I'm above trying to sell myself with my body" and so on. Being a 5 also, I guess it also makes sense why I'd reject the more physical intimacy seeking that is often associated with sx too. Instead it's all about the mind to me. I don't care about vain or sexual promiscuity. But the fact that I only care about having one partner and that monogamy is very important to me is still a strong tell-tale sign of how strongly sx driven I am. I want to exist for one person and I want that person to only exist to me.

    I was waiting for the day you and I would meet.

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  9. #49
    philosopher wood nymph greenfairy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cloud of Thunder View Post
    I'm curious, because I've been trying to figure out my stacking for a while now. I'm pretty sure I'm 3w4, but the stackings are a bit more tricky because parts of both Sx/Sp and Sp/Sx descriptions apply to me.

    Can any sx/sp or sp/sx help out?
    Me too. I think in my case sx/sp though. The part of sp/sx I didn't relate to was being materialistic and focused on status.

  10. #50
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    Quote Originally Posted by greenfairy View Post
    Me too. I think in my case sx/sp though. The part of sp/sx I didn't relate to was being materialistic and focused on status.
    To hell with materialism - it's all about the esoteric and arcane beyond this plane!

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