Social-last 3?

[Cloud of Thunder]

What makes a Sx/Sp or Sp/Sx 3w2 or 3w4 different from the 3's which more often utilize the Social instinct? I ask because it seems that out of all the E-types, it seems that 3's depend on that instinct the most. Can any 3's here elaborate on this?

 

[Savage Idealist]

Well, here's some descriptions of the So last 3's:

sp/sx
This subtype also focuses on material success but is overall less concerned with status. These Threes often try to do it all, be the perfect mother or father for instance, while working many hours, and maintaining relationships with friends and family. This subtype is prone to double and triple booking the hours of the day. Their sense of style is quite apparent. You may see them having quite a talent for design and creativity especially, where it comes to their homes and appearance. They take their relationships seriously, but when unbalanced can become cold when their self-pres instinct is threatened in any way. With the social instinct being last, they can have a distrust of new people within their circle of influence. Their focus is not naturally in the social arena, so this can unnerve the self-pres/sexual Three.

Sx/Sp
This subtype can appear almost Four-like. They can be dramatic and appear introspective, especially with the Four wing. There is an on and off quality to these Threes. They can be very emotional and then become very business like. It’s not uncommon to find this subtype in the arts, especially as actors, singers or performers. The outward sexual energy coupled with the secondary self-pres energy can cause these Threes to focus on projecting an image of themselves to the world. They will seek validation in the area of their persona. This type especially wrestles with the authenticity of the persona/image they create. On the one hand, the image protects the real self, but at the same time they hate the image they project. This subtype is likely to be in a constant state of flux when it comes to the image they project and for this reason, they run the risk of burn-out and disillusionment. They are more prone to depression than the other subtypes.

When healthier, these Threes begin to trust their intimate relationships, and begin to disentangle the real self from the flux of partial identities they create. They learn that being vulnerable is necessary if they are to get what they really want, which is to reveal the real self and trust that they are lovable even with their flaws.

 

[redacted]

I'm pretty sure my brother is a social-last 3 (ENTP 3w4 sp/sx). He isn't very active and has a bit of a hard time meeting friends, but he keeps friends very well. Seems like he's more focused on his personal goals than getting validation, although he kinda can't help but go a bit out of his way to prove he's smart when he talks to people.

 

[Cloud of Thunder]

I think the Sx/Sp 3 might be the most emotional of the 3, mainly because of the Sx/Sp dynamic.

 

[Cloud of Thunder]

I'm pretty sure my brother is a social-last 3 (ENTP 3w4 sp/sx). He isn't very active and has a bit of a hard time meeting friends, but he keeps friends very well. Seems like he's more focused on his personal goals than getting validation, although he kinda can't help but go a bit out of his way to prove he's smart when he talks to people.

I relate to this a bit, except I'm INFJ. Part of me has always liked showing off for people.

 

[sulfit]

They would be a blend of what that says for sp and sx: Instinctual Subtypes. From what I've seen the so-last 3s simply cultivate one-on-one relations with their boss and desire recognition from their higher-up at work or whoever has position above them rather than the entire group in which they are working.

 

[Elfboy]

3w2 Sp/Sx
- Kenny G
- Daniel Craig
- Jennifer Lopez

3w2 Sx/Sp
- Sylvester Stalone
- Shania Twain
- Michael Madsen

3w4 Sp/Sx
- Tiger Woods
- Dagny Taggart
- Viggo Mortensen

3w4 Sx/Sp
- Poison Ivy
- Christina Aguilera
- Ben Kingsley

 

[Cloud of Thunder]

Poison Ivy? From Batman?

 

[Elfboy]

Poison Ivy? From Batman?

yup INTJ 3w4 Sx/Sp =)

 

[Cloud of Thunder]

Yeah, so I agree with the idea of a Social-last Three appealing only to a few for validation. I couldn't care less about impressing or adjusting myself for a crowd.

 

[sulfit]

What makes a Sx/Sp or Sp/Sx 3w2 or 3w4 different from the 3's which more often utilize the Social instinct? I ask because it seems that out of all the E-types, it seems that 3's depend on that instinct the most. Can any 3's here elaborate on this?

They are going to be a mix of the sx-3 and sp-3 described here: http://www.the16types.info/vbulletin/content.php/164-Enneagram-Subtype-Descriptions

 

[garbage]

There are three or four threads where I could've put this thought, but.. here it is.

It turns out that I relate to the sp/sx description on ocean-moonshine here:

This subtype also focuses on material success but is overall less concerned with status. These Threes often try to do it all, be the perfect mother or father for instance, while working many hours, and maintaining relationships with friends and family. This subtype is prone to double and triple booking the hours of the day. Their sense of style is quite apparent. You may see them having quite a talent for design and creativity especially, where it comes to their homes and appearance. They take their relationships seriously, but when unbalanced can become cold when their self-pres instinct is threatened in any way. With the social instinct being last, they can have a distrust of new people within their circle of influence. Their focus is not naturally in the social arena, so this can unnerve the self-pres/sexual Three.

This reads to me like a desire for inner perfectionism, unhealthily gauged in terms of outer perfectionism. Less focus on 'status' as per the stereotypical 3.

But I don't relate to the overall sp tendency for 'materialism.'

Who knows! I'm open to learning more about the so-last 3. Maybe I've got my instincts all backwards.

edit: Yeah, from another thread (kudos to [MENTION=9585]mia[/MENTION]), this seals it:

sp/sx ascetic (weak sx) - mimics sp/so building of career and security, with an eye on advancement in the name of self sufficiency, but little or no concern for status as in the case of so/sp. generally serious but enjoys being amused by others.
quote: "looking out for number one."
pulls from: so/sp, to mute sx
role: the island, the one-man enterprise
exemplars: tiger woods, jerry west, hugh heffner, evel knievel, paul newman, george lucas, johnny carson
fictional from star wars: boba fett

sp/sx binger (midline) - can 'hang out' around likeminded persons to imbibe in favorite goodies, though social interaction itself is not a priority. they do however remain slyly conscious of interpersonal attraction, even if characteristically hesitant to make a first move. whether alone or not, retains an air of privacy, reluctant to 'come out' of themselves.
quote: "all things in moderation, including moderation."
role: the soloist, the mercenary
exemplars: kobe bryant, anthony bourdain, simon cowell, robert deniro, harrison ford, ralph nader
fictional from star wars: han solo