Multiple Enneagram Subtypes/Instincts The relationship between the two most dominant instincts

[Elfboy]

hah. I am so definitely SP/SO that it hurts based on the things said.

no need to be hurt. I think Sp/So tend to have higher income than other types and are the most stable of the instinct variants. compare Sp/So to the sex drugs and rock and roll lifestyle of many Sx/Sos and you'll probably be glad you're Sp/So when you're older and have a stable bank account and good health
Edit: never mind, I read your post wrong. I suppose what I said still applies though. Sp/So is not the most glamorous or sexy instinct variant, but they tend to get what they want

 

[Glycerine]

haha thanks. I don't mind it much.... although it gives the impression that I am dull (which may be true). It's kinda funny but people know more about me here than IRL, how's that for sp? LOL

 

[Elfboy]

haha thanks. I don't mind it much.... although it gives the impression that I am dull (which may be true). It's kinda funny but people know more about me here than IRL, how's that for sp? LOL

Sp doms do tend to keep to themselves more. when they are extroverts, they tend to be more chilll

 

[Speed Gavroche]

Depends if both are of similar weighting or there's a large gap between them.

As an sx/sp, it causes push/pull within me. Sx greatly desires intimacy with another. Sp throws up a wall if there's uncertainty.

I really have more the impression that you are Sp/So or So/Sp.

 

[Speed Gavroche]

Sp/Sx: may use sex appeal to attain financial stability and comfort (think super model)

I think it's also "I work hard to build his own confortable nutshell before I look for an intimate guest"

Sp/So: may use social graces to attain financial stability and comfort (think social climbing executive)

Yes.

Sx/Sp: may use financial means to increase sex appeal (think cougar or sugar daddy)
Sx/So: may use social standing and status to increase sex appeal (think stereotypical alpha male)

The thing is that social status and financial gain are often linked to each other. My avatar for example, was totally a sugar daddy but he was a pure Sx/So, though he became rich only when he became famous. Sx/So is more "I gain sexual power and money toward a social status but I don't care too much about the money, rich or not, I barely change my extreme lifestyle", while Sx/Sp is more "I gain sex and social position because of my money but I don't care too much about the social position, popular or not, I still be a one-man-storm, an island".

Sp/So is more "I'm in a very good position of wealth and social respect, but i don't put too much energy in the sexual realm"

So/Sp: may use their survival and financial means to benefit the group (think person is a position of service)

It's also: I'am an agressive social climber, and work well for a stable position, but my sensuality is awkward.

So/Sx: may use their sex appeal to gain social status and acceptance (think fraternities and sororities)

Or supermodel: Gisele Bündchen, Adriana Lima, Alessandra Ambroisio, they are So/Sx/

So/Sx is also: I'm popular and charismatic and my sex-appeal and sense of individuality help a lot, but when it's time to care about my safety, I'm infantile, tough I'm quite addictive, I'm not very addictive.

 

[rav3n]

I really have more the impression that you are Sp/So or So/Sp.

Just goes to prove how inaccurate your typing attempts are...

 

[Speed Gavroche]

Just goes to prove how inaccurate your typing attempts are...

I'm among the best typist of the forum, but if you are Sx/Sp, there's nothing wrong about considering other possibilities, that's all.

 

[Elfboy]

I think it's also "I work hard to build his own confortable nutshell before I look for an intimate guest"

I agree with this

The thing is that social status and financial gain are often linked to each other. My avatar for example, was totally a sugar daddy but he was a pure Sx/So, though he became rich only when he became famous. Sx/So is more "I gain sexual power and money toward a social status but I don't care too much about the money, rich or not, I barely change my extreme lifestyle", while Sx/Sp is more "I gain sex and social position because of my money but I don't care too much about the social position, popular or not, I still be a one-man-storm, an island".

when I picture Sx/So, I picture a player who infiltrates social groups, has sex with all the women and either stays or leaves to do the same to another group. usually a guy that is charismatic and alluring but has a "terrible reputation" and all the guys hate him because he's a pussy robber (I know it's stereotypical, that's just the first image I get lol)

Sp/So is more "I'm in a very good position of wealth and social respect, but i don't put too much energy in the sexual realm"
It's also: I'am an agressive social climber, and work well for a stable position, but my sensuality is awkward.

that works

Or supermodel: Gisele Bündchen, Adriana Lima, Alessandra Ambroisio, they are So/Sx
So/Sx is also: I'm popular and charismatic and my sex-appeal and sense of individuality help a lot, but when it's time to care about my safety, I'm infantile, tough I'm quite addictive, I'm not very addictive.

that works

 

[Elfboy]

Just goes to prove how inaccurate your typing attempts are...

I saw you as more Sp/Sx personally, don't know what you're like IRL

 

[rav3n]

I saw you as more Sp/Sx personally, don't know what you're like IRL

I can see this since online, I'm very cautious who I connect with when it comes to the online environment. Had some very bad experiences in the past.

 

[Elfboy]

I can see this since online, I'm very cautious who I connect with when it comes to the online environment. Had some very bad experiences in the past.

I know just what you mean.

 

[Vizzy]

hah. I am so definitely SP/SO that it hurts based on the things said.

Does you as an Sp/So follow the theory in post #31? Just curious about how others are ordering their instincts and why.

 

[Glycerine]

Does you as an Sp/So follow the theory in post #31? Just curious about how others are ordering their instincts and why.

yes, I am fairly socially awkward but when I need/ want something for my security, I usually know how to play the game in order to get it.

 

[Vizzy]

^^^
I appreciate the elaboration, Glycerine.

Looks like it's slowing down.
Thanks to everyone for making this such an interesting discussion.

When they are unhealthy, Sexual types can experience a scattering of their attention and a profound lack of focus. They may act out in sexual promiscuity or become trapped in a fearful, dysfunctional attitude toward sex and intimacy. When the latter becomes their orientation, they will be equally intense about their avoidances.

I am Sx/Sp - the celibate kind. Yet I can't begin to tell you how 'sexual' I am in my thoughts and approach to others. I've noticed that I automatically view any guy as a potential interest, even if they're not my type. It's only when I find out that they have a girlfriend that I really feel relaxed. My mental approach towards them changes. Less concentrated. Less...pointed.
No one I know would ever guess any of that about me. They'd be utterly shocked. My Sp does its job well.

I started this thread with just the intention of pinpointing the theory behind instinct order. Ended up also clarifying my type, which is a bonus.

 

[Elfboy]

^^^
I appreciate the elaboration, Glycerine.

Looks like it's slowing down.
Thanks to everyone for making this such an interesting discussion.



I am Sx/Sp - the celibate kind. Yet I can't begin to tell you how 'sexual' I am in my thoughts and approach to others. I've noticed that I automatically view any guy as a potential interest, even if they're not my type. It's only when I find out that they have a girlfriend that I really feel relaxed. My mental approach towards them changes. Less concentrated. Less...pointed.
No one I know would ever guess any of that about me. They'd be utterly shocked. My Sp does its job well.

I started this thread with just the intention of pinpointing the theory behind instinct order. Ended up also clarifying my type, which is a bonus.

why are you celibate? that's gotta suck =P

 

[Viridian]

I have the feeling that Sp is about more than security of one's self per se... It could also, perhaps, manifest itself as a more "reserved" demeanor, or a preference for managing things - not necessarily one's own stuff - without much interference? The librarian profession, for instance, sounds very Sp-oriented, especially in 1s, 5s, 6s or 9s.

 

[Vizzy]

why are you celibate? that's gotta suck =P

How can I put this without sounding more "emo"? lol
Perhaps "celibate" has connotations that are misleading. It's not for any religious reason or some high-and-mighty moral.

To really simplify it: Fear. Getting that emotionally involved with a guy in the first place. That - not the sex - is the hurdle. It intrigues me immensely though...not that anyone would guess it. Sx/Sp prude, here.

And it doesn't really suck. I'm always occupied...intellectually.

 

[hhp]

To really simplify it: Fear. Getting that emotionally involved with a guy in the first place. That - not the sex - is the hurdle.

I relate so much with what you've said in your posts. I may be also a Sx/sp; at least, the description this page gives of Sx/sp 5's fits me perfectly: http://ocean-moonshine.net/e1428573...er_op=view_page&PAGE_id=33&MMN_position=86:80

I think there's a core contradiction in all Sx/sp types. For example, on the one hand, what I really want deep inside is complete connection with somebody, like finding my other half. But on the other hand, my sp instinct prevents that to happen, because my natural reaction is detachment and building defenses against others. So I can have a one-night stand with a guy, no problem with that, but the next morning I just want to go away and don't see or talk with that person anymore. And that's because I don't trust people generally, I see them as potential dangers and, though I don't like isolation, I keep distances. I'm afraid I'll lose my self-sufficiency and become weak if I don't do so.

So, putting it in Freudian terms, I could say that my Ego wants intimacy with one person (that special person, may it be a lover or a best friend), but my Id tells me that depending too much on a person is dangerous and that I'm better on my own. It's really like self-sabotage.
Of course, being myself a 5, I'm not sure how much of this behaviour is due to sp instinct and how much is due to type itself.

 

[Silveresque]

Could sp last make a 6 more trusting and less "the world is a dangerous place"? I assumed I was sp first or second because I'm cautious and don't like taking risks, but 6's are cautious in general I think.

 

[Speed Gavroche]

Could sp last make a 6 more trusting and less "the world is a dangerous place"?

No.