[sx] The Sx dom (re: Hazashin's question for me)

[Totenkindly]

That quote was the entirety of the Sp description in general on that page. So I kind of have to weigh that trait heavily as it is the only one listed, assuming there are more somewhere out there. It's not like a test where I can score lightly on some traits and more heavily on others, and then come out slightly on the heavy side.

This form of typology is really making me think... I believe that even as an older child - say, 10 years old - I was a daredevil, riding my bike down flights of stairs, swinging to the highest point on the swing set where I could jump off and set a length record. A lot of things of that nature. That is an anti-Sp trait in my view. I had more scraped knees and elbows than any of my friends.

Well, I did that too, and I consider myself to have operated within a much more SP mindset for some time. It's just now that I'm not as neurotic and more balanced that I find I'm pretty SX and get irked with the hardcore self-encapsulated SP mindset.

They are all ways of relating to people and how energy is directed. SO tends to create a lot of broad but not necessarily deep connections; SX looks for intensity of connection; SP tends to keep the self hidden and safe and only known to a few. All these other traits might stem from that kind of mindset but don't seem to be core to me.

 

[Hazashin]

Yes, at the time I did not see myself as attractive. Or if someone found me attractive I could explain it away as something else. And if women looked in my direction, I figured there was something wrong with my presentation somewhere.

Edit - from my experience, the fact that nobody has told you doesn't MEAN anything. If you see yourself in some Sx descriptions and none of the others, then maybe you should just consider that.

Even as introspective as I am, I'm finding this a very difficult type call to make for myself. I wouldn't even attempt to type someone I don't know enough about.

But do you think there is even enough to go off of to make that sort of judgment? I don't get out much at all. I am loser who stays on the Internet most of the time.

 

[Lady_X]

Well, I did that too, and I consider myself to have operated within a much more SP mindset for some time. It's just now that I'm not as neurotic and more balanced that I find I'm pretty SX and get irked with the hardcore self-encapsulated SP mindset.

They are all ways of relating to people and how energy is directed. SO tends to create a lot of broad but not necessarily deep connections; SX looks for intensity of connection; SP tends to keep the self hidden and safe and only known to a few. All these other traits might stem from that kind of mindset but don't seem to be core to me.

so...would you say then that one would be sx/sp if they look for intensity first...but can also be very private/hidden/safe??

 

[Hazashin]

so...would you say then that one would be sx/sp if they look for intensity first...but can also be very private/hidden/safe??

I was wondering the same thing.

 

[A window to the soul]

so...would you say then that one would be sx/sp if they look for intensity first...but can also be very private/hidden/safe??

Uh oh, here comes trouble.

To answer your question, not exactly. The three 'instincts' reside at the unconscious level; so to say you're "looking for intensity,” doesn’t sound right to me. I think it's more like you're naturally attracted, attracting, and repelling people as an sx/sp. Instincts.

 

[Lady_X]

Uh oh, here comes trouble.

To answer your question, not exactly. The three 'instincts' reside at the unconscious level; so to say you're "looking for intensity,” doesn’t sound right to me. I think it's more like you're naturally attracted, attracting, and repelling people as an sx/sp. Instincts.

just to be clear...i was using her wording. i don't feel like i'm looking for intensity. i'm just very aware of the chemistry or spark between people but can also be very private.

 

[A window to the soul]

just to be clear...i was using her wording. i don't feel like i'm looking for intensity. i'm just very aware of the chemistry or spark between people but can also be very private.

Gotcha. I figured you all already knew the high level stuff, but just in case, I threw it out there.

Did you see the description about the sx/sp "one man storm"? See if this helps, http://theenneagram.blogspot.com/2007/09/instinctual-variant-stackings.html#sxsp.

 

[Mal12345]

Well, I did that too, and I consider myself to have operated within a much more SP mindset for some time. It's just now that I'm not as neurotic and more balanced that I find I'm pretty SX and get irked with the hardcore self-encapsulated SP mindset.

They are all ways of relating to people and how energy is directed. SO tends to create a lot of broad but not necessarily deep connections; SX looks for intensity of connection; SP tends to keep the self hidden and safe and only known to a few. All these other traits might stem from that kind of mindset but don't seem to be core to me.

Your idea of Sp sounds like introversion. All three of your descriptions involve relationships with others. Is that at the core of this system? Are Sp's head-in-sand self-encapsulated? Or are they just, as the descriptions I've read indicate, concerned with watching out for their personal well-being (materially, socially, etc)?

Self-preservation comes out in many ways. Sometimes it may involve a pre-emptive strike against a foreseen danger. But self-preservation, safety, and security lies at the core of the Sp type.

"SP tends to keep the self hidden and safe and only known to a few." Safe, of course. Hidden: perhaps that's just a type 5 interpretation of the instinct to find security. Other types may find it safer to bring their issues out into the open.

 

[Sunny Ghost]

Uh oh, here comes trouble.

To answer your question, not exactly. The three 'instincts' reside at the unconscious level; so to say you're "looking for intensity,” doesn’t sound right to me. I think it's more like you're naturally attracted, attracting, and repelling people as an sx/sp. Instincts.

just to be clear...i was using her wording. i don't feel like i'm looking for intensity. i'm just very aware of the chemistry or spark between people but can also be very private.

this is where i get confused a lot of the time.

lemme just walk you through my day... if i may?

i go to the coffee shop this morning. i have a hard time keeping my head forward and tend to look at the ground a lot in order to avoid eye contact. i feel like when i make eye contact, that i feel these connections between me and whoever i'm looking at or is looking at me. i feel like people feel that from me, too. i also have so much swirling around in my head, like, "why did i make this person... uncomfortable and shifty? do they just think i'm pretty? did i give them a weird vibe?" etc. and this happens between me and the few people i pass by. (i've also considered i'm simply neurotic and paranoid.) i get to the barrista. she avoids looking at me too. i know she is. and she always does. it makes me uneasy.

waiting tables can be difficult because of this, too. so i go to work, and and always hyper aware of automated movements and eye contact and thought processes behind them when i'm waiting on people. sometimes there can be one single person in the dining room, though i may not know them, that may throw me off of my normal duties. it's like i've singled this one person out. i've done it in classrooms. at work waiting tables. going to the coffee shop. going to the bar. doesn't matter. buying groceries. it can be male or female, so it's not merely a sexual attraction kind of thing. it's sort of like i just tune into one person and become curious. though i also often see myself as creepy. maybe i use SP as a shield, first, when perhaps SX is more natural to me? i tune in, but i'm closed off. and i rarely make contact with people, especially when intensity is involved. i think i just see it as too vulnerable. and when i feel vulnerable and exposed, i close everyone off. i hide away in my house and my bedroom.

where i work, we have lots of regulars. i also live in a small town. i see lots of the same 100, 200 or whatever it is, faces, every single day. and the longer i'm here, the more i've locked on to different people around me that i'm exposed to and have become curious about them or their lives, etc. i pick up minor details here and there and form pictures of these people. there are also some people that i notice strong intensity with, though i'm unsure of what it implies. but for whatever reason, these people scare me. i find my heart jumping a lot when i cross paths with these people. even if i'm not attracted to them, but feel as though they've also picked me out of a crowd.

 

[Mal12345]

But do you think there is even enough to go off of to make that sort of judgment? I don't get out much at all. I am loser who stays on the Internet most of the time.

I don't see how it's possible to discover oneself that way. A great deal of what you learn about yourself HAS to come from other people, in reality and not on the net.

 

[Lady_X]

Gotcha. I figured you all already knew the high level stuff, but just in case, I threw it out there.

Did you see the description about the sx/sp "one man storm"? See if this helps, http://theenneagram.blogspot.com/2007/09/instinctual-variant-stackings.html#sxsp.

thanks...i have seen it. i'm still confused...because i think most would see me more like gwen steffani or drew barrymore sx/so and i agree its likely i may come off that way...but i feel like sx/sp might be more true to who i actually am...frick frack idk

 

[Hazashin]

I don't see how it's possible to discover oneself that way. A great deal of what you learn about yourself HAS to come from other people, in reality and not on the net.

Oh, I know. I was asking if you thought that a correct judgment can be made if I don't go out much?

 

[Sunny Ghost]

Your idea of Sp sounds like introversion. All three of your descriptions involve relationships with others. Is that at the core of this system? Are Sp's head-in-sand self-encapsulated? Or are they just, as the descriptions I've read indicate, concerned with watching out for their personal well-being (materially, socially, etc)?

Self-preservation comes out in many ways. Sometimes it may involve a pre-emptive strike against a foreseen danger. But self-preservation, safety, and security lies at the core of the Sp type.

"SP tends to keep the self hidden and safe and only known to a few." Safe, of course. Hidden: perhaps that's just a type 5 interpretation of the instinct to find security. Other types may find it safer to bring their issues out into the open.

The instincts seem too limiting. Are there healthy and unhealthy degrees of instinctual variants? And it also seems as though not everyone agrees on single definitions. What motivates the SP to keep hidden or only known to a few?

 

[Mal12345]

Oh, I know. I was asking if you thought that a correct judgment can be made if I don't go out much?

You'll never know until you get out more.

 

[Mal12345]

The instincts seem too limiting. Are there healthy and unhealthy degrees of instinctual variants? And it also seems as though not everyone agrees on single definitions. What motivates the SP to keep hidden or only known to a few?

To be hidden isn't my definition of Sp. My reply only says Sp has to do with safety, security, and of course self-preservation. If the Type 5 wants to become hermit-like, then that's just a type 5 interpretation of what it means to desire security. Consider Ted Kaczynsky for an example of what could be the Sp/Sx type 5 collapsing the boundaries inward. As for the opposite attitude toward security, the type 8 Sp would seek it through acquiring more stuff and expanding personal territory, bringing along with it more to dominate and control.

I've read a little bit that indicates there are healthy to unhealthy levels to this. Consider this page:
http://ocean-moonshine.net/e1428573...er_op=view_page&PAGE_id=33&MMN_position=86:80
then look for the text that says "when unhealthy..."

 

[ChocolateMoose123]

like the fact that we are aware constantly of the chemistry between our self and others...this can't be turned off. this makes your so feel like you're still looking...even when you're not. i am honest with myself about it and will avoid people i feel a vibe with...yeah...that sucks for your so to hear too. my bf said he doesn't even notice it when he's in a relationship...he can find someone attractive but there's no vibey thing happening...i find that hard to believe...because it's been like that my whole life...constant awareness.

I'm an sx/sp and this rings true. You just are very aware of the intensity of another person quickly. It's not necessarily a romantic attraction. It can be interest, curiosity, testing of that person to get to the heart of their energy? I don't know how to describe it better than that but it's almost always desiring an instant report quickly but not necessarily needing it ever again (SP comes into play here). SX/SP, in my experience, has a binge and purge, ebb and flow energy. It's very conflicted at heart and if you were sx/sp I hope this would all be relatable.

 

[Sunny Ghost]

To be hidden isn't my definition of Sp. My reply only says Sp has to do with safety, security, and of course self-preservation. If the Type 5 wants to become hermit-like, then that's just a type 5 interpretation of what it means to desire security. Consider Ted Kaczynsky for an example of what could be the Sp/Sx type 5 collapsing the boundaries inward. As for the opposite attitude toward security, the type 8 Sp would seek it through acquiring more stuff and expanding personal territory, bringing along with it more to dominate and control.

I've read a little bit that indicates there are healthy to unhealthy levels to this. Consider this page:
http://ocean-moonshine.net/e1428573...er_op=view_page&PAGE_id=33&MMN_position=86:80
then look for the text that says "when unhealthy..."

i should have been more clear. i was agreeing with you.

 

[brainheart]

I'm an sx/sp and this rings true. You just are very aware of the intensity of another person quickly. It's not necessarily a romantic attraction. It can be interest, curiosity, testing of that person to get to the heart of their energy? I don't know how to describe it better than that but it's almost always desiring an instant report quickly but not necessarily needing it ever again (SP comes into play here). SX/SP, in my experience, has a binge and purge, ebb and flow energy. It's very conflicted at heart and if you were sx/sp I hope this would all be relatable.

Yes, relatable. Goes with...

"sx/sp This is perhaps the most internally conflicted of the stackings, and potentially the most inconsistent in behavior. This may occur as a blockage of the sexual instinct which can be redirected as a more generally brooding and troubled personality. They may isolate themselves for long periods of time before reemerging. They live according to a strictly personal outlook and are not particularly concerned with the approval of others outside of their immediate concern. They seem to be searching for something, the missing piece. If they find a soulmate they will unite without fanfare, forming a secret bond, dealing with formalities as an afterthought. Powerful sexual impulses facing inner resistance may manifest symbolically in the psyche, giving way to soulful interpretations of the unconscious. Under periods of stress severe sexual tensions may manifest as erratic, impulsively destructive behavior. Can seem restless, torn between the comforts of a stable home life and the urge to wander. May be prone to self-medicating. Motivation: to know the heart, reconcile inner conflict, form a secure union."

 

[Lady_X]

yes it is. i'm extremely loyal...like..it's important to protect that sacredness of a bond completely...so intense interesting vibey energy reads like danger danger abort abort haha and it's just there...there's no thought process...i mean no figuring it out process just an immediate temperature check...luke warm is fine good...hey how ya doin...scalding is um...no!! cold is...eh...bored...who else can i talk to haha wow...i'm going to stop talking now. this sounds awful. :/

 

[Sunny Ghost]

yes it is. i'm extremely loyal...like..it's important to protect that sacredness of a bond completely...so intense interesting vibey energy reads like danger danger abort abort haha and it's just there...there's no thought process...i mean no figuring it out process just an immediate temperature check...luke warm is fine good...hey how ya doin...scalding is um...no!! cold is...eh...bored...who else can i talk to haha wow...i'm going to stop talking now. this sounds awful. :/

THAT I can relate to.

You guys have me wondering if I'm SX first again.