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Thread: sp/sx or sx/sp?

  1. #21
    brainheart
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    Quote Originally Posted by IndyAnnaJoan View Post
    Sexual ||||||||||||||||||||| 70%
    Social ||||||||||||||||||||| 70%
    Self Preservation |||||||||||||||||||||||||||| 82%







    You can share my thread if you want

    A 4w5 sx/sp (seems very sp/sx to me here...?) hanging with a 4w5 so/sx (directed by an old teacher of mine, just noticed!):

  2. #22
    Senior Member IndyGhost's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Orobas View Post
    "soc/sx
    This type has very strong one to one social skills, but is usually uncomfortable in group settings. They enjoy cultivating multiple relationships, and can be intensely involved when in the presence of someone they are interested in, but have difficulty sustaining these bonds when apart. This may give the impression of being flighty and rootless, willing to adapt and mirror others in order to connect, but lacking a defined approach that would give their relationships a more solid standing. They may have political interests, but are generally more pragmatic and less partisan than the other social variant. They are often attuned to pop culture and the latest trends. This type's motivation is to create lasting connections with those they are interested in - the "best friend."

    ^^ this sounds sort of generic ISFP-ish possibly, but i dunno, just a guess. Indy you have a very abstract/analytical/passionate flavor to me, as compared to the other isfps I have known-I think it is your Ni, but I dont understand how that impacts stackings and stuff like this to be honest, but i figured I'd past the above text just for content.
    Compared to other ISFP's I know in real life, I feel very un-ISFP-ish. Most ISFP's are cool and laid back. But I have no doubt of my being an ISFP. In person, I'd describe myself as multi-faceted. Swinging from ultra bubbly and silly, or even hyper and party loving, to very mellow and thought out and analytical. It depends on when you catch me, I suppose. And my type C, is time for me to introvert into Fi and Ni. And I do enjoy cultivating Ni. (Or rather what I perceive to be my use of Ni). I think it's my being a 4w5.

    The definition above does sound a lot like me... but I don't know if it's the whole story to me. A lot of the various definitions seem to fit. But as I sit here and think on it more, I think I might be more SP/SO. But I'm not really sure what other SP/SO's look like. I am very well aware of social norms and statuses, and what people think of me and caring about what people think of me. This is the aspect of myself I dislike. I could do without it, and yet those thoughts of concern are there. However, I much prefer one to one interaction to group interaction. Groups make me nervous. One on one, I'm always comfortable. And one on one I always tied with SX, not SO. But I suppose that isn't necessarily the case if you're an introvert.

    When I'm not involved with a relationship, I desire it. And I can be extremely romantic and mushy and etc. But when I am involved in a relationship, I question if this is where I want to be and begin to resent feeling tied down, or will begin to feel bored. But the comfort is nice at the same time. And I suppose I am attracted to someone that can help provide. So, money, food, etc, I do worry about, like your typical SP. And I've always personally lingered closer to poverty, having relied too often on my emotions and impulses in the past.

    As for SX... I used to feel that strong pull towards intensity. Intensity of emotions, experience, etc. That may just be my being a 4. I've realized I've become a bit healthier these days, however, and have probably integrated towards 1... and this need for intensity has dissipated a bit. I still desire that intensity... but I don't live for it, or screw things up to purposely experience it. I've become okay with mundane and everyday. Calm is good.



    Quote Originally Posted by brainheart View Post


    You can share my thread if you want

    A 4w5 sx/sp (seems very sp/sx to me here...?) hanging with a 4w5 so/sx (directed by an old teacher of mine, just noticed!):
    I think I just hijacked it.

    Is the Allen Ginserg guy the so/sx?
    "I don't know a perfect person.
    I only know flawed people who are still worth loving."
    -John Green

  3. #23
    brainheart
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    ^ I think the thing to remember, IAJ, is that we use all the instincts, it's just the order of your preference- so which do you use most of the time? Being a four you're going to use them all in a four-like way. That's what's confusing. Thinking about it this way, it seems sp/sx/so for me. yeah, Allen Ginsberg is the so/sx- note how much more chatty he is, how much he facilitates the conversation, is concerned about including Bob, hearing what he has to say- he's acting as both interviewer and entertainer. He is a great interviewee- the recent movie Howl is primarily based on interviews of his, because he talks freely and openly about deep feelings that all fours feel, in a very all-inclusive universal way. (Seems a sx/so will be more provocative/shocking/ 'unique' about it). Thing is, the sx/sp and sp/sx are more likely to express that through their art only or in writing, not also in speaking, the sp/sx the most reserved of the types with sx in the top two stackings.

    I think communicating on forums can be misleading, too, because I think people can seem more social than they are in real life. I sure don't talk like this anywhere else.

  4. #24
    Senior Member IndyGhost's Avatar
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    note how much more chatty he is, how much he facilitates the conversation, is concerned about including Bob, hearing what he has to say- he's acting as both interviewer and entertainer.
    THAT I can relate to. I'm always concerned as to whether or not they're having a good time, in a good mood, etc. This is why I can never throw a party. Too much stress. I feel in charge of everyone's good time and i don't like that kind of pressure. Same for making suggestions for any other activities. If it doesn't go well, I'll worry it's my fault.

    so what are SO/SP's like then?
    "I don't know a perfect person.
    I only know flawed people who are still worth loving."
    -John Green

  5. #25
    brainheart
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    Quote Originally Posted by IndyAnnaJoan View Post
    THAT I can relate to. I'm always concerned as to whether or not they're having a good time, in a good mood, etc. This is why I can never throw a party. Too much stress. I feel in charge of everyone's good time and i don't like that kind of pressure. Same for making suggestions for any other activities. If it doesn't go well, I'll worry it's my fault.

    so what are SO/SP's like then?
    I suspect my husband is a 9w8 so/sp (maybe so/sx, def so first) so I can possibly provide input. He hardly ever spends time alone, but he is very resentful of this, but he feels social obligations, and always has to be a part of the action, so that seems to be his battle (he's a 9 which I know colors this, sorry.) He too feels the need to make everyone feel okay. He thinks he's being intimate but he doesn't go deep- he talks about music he likes or skateboarding or his eating habits, things he wants to buy. He is a romantic in the conventional sense- tokens of affection, saying sweet things. He has major longevity- his interests haven't changed, ever. He is a hard worker, doesn't want to ruffle feathers or make waves, so he often keeps his opinions to himself, then vents to me later. Team player. Very nice, likeable person.

    Good description of variants: http://theenneagram.blogspot.com/200...-variants.html

    As far as four goes...


    Self-pres/Social

    This subtype is the least volatile and fiery of the type Four stackings. They can resemble type One in terms of their efficiency and practicality. Although their focus will be more on the emotional aesthetic, these Fours do have a considerable practical side. Less flashy than some of the subtypes of Four, they nevertheless have a quiet charm and developed sense of style. They are likely to value their possessions, to perhaps collect items of personal emotional significance. They may, for instance, have shelves and shelves of books and have a place for each book. This subtype can also resemble type Six in terms of having a great deal of anxiety. This anxiety often revolves around self-pres concerns such as those surrounding health issues and mortality. Their strong self-pres instinct also lends a degree of independence to this subtype. As the sexual instinct is least pronounced, this subtype of Four is prone to romanticize intimacy without actually pursuing real relationships. When healthy, these Fours can be very productive; when less healthy they might suffer from boughts of melancholy or self pity. The strong self-pres instinct however often helps these individuals to recognize how their state of mind is impacting their health and well being. This enables them to become action oriented.


    Social/Self-pres

    This subtype can mimic type One when it comes to social values. They can be harsh critics of the current mores. They have romantic ideals of what the world should be like; reality always falls short. Ironically, this type can be the most withdrawn of the Fours. Social anxiety combines with the Four's shame issues to make this type feel that the pressure associated with "fitting in" is just not worth it. They are also the most likely of the Fours to intellectualize their emotions and in this way resemble type Five.

    The social instinct tends to give the personality a focus on being included, fitting in, or finding a way to make a valued contribution. This agenda conflicts with the Four's sense of being "different from" or "other than." The Four's need to establish a separate identity conflicts with the social instinct's drive towards inclusion. The social Four often deals with this dilemma by defining themselves as being outside the social system. By defining themselves always in terms of the system, even if it is to establish distance, this Four stays essentially tied to it. Fours with the social/self-pres stacking tend to acutely feel a sense of social shame at not quite belonging.

    When this subtype is reasonably healthy, they are often gifted critics of the prevailing culture. They develop true insight into social dynamics and have an eye for the nuances and subtleties of social interactions. Many Four writers are soc/self.
    Alan Watts 4w5 sp/so


    Ingmar Bergman 4w5 so/sp


  6. #26
    Whisky Old & Women Young Speed Gavroche's Avatar
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    You seem to much quiet and not enough assertive to be Sx/Sp. I feel you as an Sp/Sx.

    An example of 4w5 So/Sx on this board is SillySapienne, I think.
    EsTP 6w7 Sx/Sp

    Chaotic Neutral

    E=60% S=55% T=70% P=80%

    "I don't believe in guilt, I only believe in living on impulses"

    "Stereotypes about personality and gender turn out to be fairly accurate: ... On the binary Myers-Briggs measure, the thinking-feeling breakdown is about 30/70 for women versus 60/40 for men." ~ Bryan Caplan

  7. #27
    brainheart
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    Quote Originally Posted by Speed Gavroche View Post
    You seem to much quiet and not enough assertive to be Sx/Sp. I feel you as an Sp/Sx.

    An example of 4w5 So/Sx on this board is SillySapienne, I think.
    me or IAJ?

  8. #28
    Whisky Old & Women Young Speed Gavroche's Avatar
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    Both, I think.
    EsTP 6w7 Sx/Sp

    Chaotic Neutral

    E=60% S=55% T=70% P=80%

    "I don't believe in guilt, I only believe in living on impulses"

    "Stereotypes about personality and gender turn out to be fairly accurate: ... On the binary Myers-Briggs measure, the thinking-feeling breakdown is about 30/70 for women versus 60/40 for men." ~ Bryan Caplan

  9. #29
    Senior Member Chiharu's Avatar
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    I always test as equal or nearly equal with sx and sp. Very low on so. I'm a four and I have have elements of both 4 sx and 4 sp and don't completely relate to either. I do think sx is slightly more dominant though.

  10. #30
    brainheart
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    My problem was I was thinking I was a four instead of a nine.


    Sexual 9 - Seeking Intimacy/Intensity
    Udit Patel Merging (Ichazo's "Union")

    Sexual Nines seek a sense of well-being by finding something or someone to merge with. They want to be at one with the world, with beauty, with nature, but especially with a special, ideal lover. That being said, Sexual Nines have many anxieties about losing themselves by submerging their identity in the other. Thus, they can sometimes appear ambivalent and emotionally conflicted, like Fours or Sixes. They sometimes attempt to "solve" the inner conflict between their desire for merging and their desire for independence by "triangulation." They engage in two separate, simultaneous relationships that serve different needs while never completely showing up in either. Needless to say, this can create the kinds of conflicts that Nines are trying to avoid.

    The overall affect of Sexual Nines is one of gentleness, ease, and flow, and they seek these qualities in others and in the environment. They also tend to be highly sensual, enjoying tastes, textures, and sensations. Although they resemble Fours in this regard, being ethereal and dreamy, their sensuality is earthy and embodied, and they are not as self-aware or self-doubting as Fours. Sexual Nines tend to be more imaginative than the other Variants—often with elements of gentle whimsy and heroic fantasy. They see the world in magical terms, investing even ordinary objects with a warm glow. They seem to take in the world with a wide-eyed wonder and have a characteristic child-like aura about them.

    LifeExplore

    Focused on an ideal of romantic union. Get lost in one relationship or in the yearning to have one. High expectations of partner. Sometimes sound melancholy like a Four. Prone to jealousy. May settle on someone and then grow critical and have a wandering eye. Can also deny their partner's flaws and idealize them to stay in union. Another scenario involves multiple relationships, searching from one person to the next. Sometimes the Nine can't decide between two people. Triangulation. Paradoxically, this subtype can be fickle because they are so easily disappointed.

    Social 9 - Seeking Acceptance/Belonging/Inclusion/Status
    Udit Patel One Happy Family (Ichazo's "Participation")

    Social Nines seek a sense of well being through social connection and friendship. People of this variant may often not seem like Nines because they are usually more outgoing, active, and involved in their world. There is more warmth and affection expressed by Nines of this variant. They tend to be idealistic and are often supportive of causes, acting as the "social glue" in many organizations and groups. But even in the midst of social activity, Social Nines remain strangely unaware of and unaffected by the problems of others. They are drawn to situations in which they feel they can belong, but they also internally hold themselves apart—usually by emotionally distancing themselves from others while maintaining an outward friendliness.

    Since Social Nines tend to be affable and cheerful and enjoy having different experiences, they can resemble Sevens. They also tend to be more task-oriented: they enjoy working on projects and being involved in meaningful activities with others, so they can also resemble Threes. Unlike Threes, however, Social Nines have difficulty sustaining efforts on their own behalf. They do not easily pursue their own goals and tend to get sidetracked by social interactions and others' needs and agendas.

    LifeExplore

    Social Nines tend to gravitate toward groups and then have conflicts about joining or staying apart. Can enjoy group energy and interests but may be also aware of the group's expectations. These the Nine will both play along with and resist. When immersed in a group, social Nines can lose themselves, trying to become all things to all people. Gregarious but may start to resist being too heavily influenced, to compensate for their sense of lost identity. Can sometimes resent how the group doesn't really see them. May fixate on what others think of them. Or resent the group and make fun of it. Some social Nines stay basically uninvolved but hang out at the group's edge. Frequently there's lots of activity. May get caught up in roles - a stronger connection to 3 goes with this subtype.

    Self-Preservation 9 - Seeking Saftey/Comfort
    Udit Patel The Comfort Seeker (Ichazo's "Appetite")

    Self-Preservation Nines are perhaps the most easygoing Nines, but they are also the most likely to need time alone, untroubled by other people's influence and requirements. They seek a sense of well-being through comfort: familiar routines, "comfort foods," and a supportive, uncomplicated environment are all highly valued. Self-Pres Nines have their own way of doing things, their own pace, and their own philosophy of life, and they will stubbornly resist any effort to change any of these things. Self-Pres Nines are also people of few words, preferring to communicate in nonverbal ways. They often pretend to be less savvy and aware than they actually are, as if tempting other people to underestimate them—so that they will be left alone. Positively, they are grounded and patient, possessing a great deal of common sense. They tend to have problems with overindulging themselves in food and drink, or conversely with rigorously controlling their diets—this is especially true of Self-Pres Nines with the One wing. They may also lack physical exercise. In any case, having their routine and lifestyle change is very challenging for them.

    LifeExplore

    Preoccupied with physical comfort, maintaining habits and satisfying appetites. The image of the lazy couch potato goes with this subtype. Strategy for getting along is to ask as little of life as possible. Can have a love of the minimal and enjoy the repetition of known routines. Distract themselves with pleasant domestic activities. Live conservatively. Consume food and drink for anaesthesia. May have large appetites, drug addictions, be physically slow moving.

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