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  1. #11
    Senior Member IndyGhost's Avatar
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    So, in your opinion, you don't believe there is such a thing as stacking? Is it a jumping from one variant to another, or merely one casted variant?

    I also don't understand how this simplifies human behavior?
    "I don't know a perfect person.
    I only know flawed people who are still worth loving."
    -John Green

  2. #12
    ThatGirl
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    Well, everything we do has an instinctive reaction behind it. We know the three main instincts. So at any given time, we will be acting from one of those instincts.

    I am not going to act the same while chatting someone up at a bar that I would if someone is chasing me.

    Or maybe I would, then that would give a very simple answer to a complex reaction...I am afraid to be open in love or fear losing myself.

    The three themes listed in the op tend to be very predictable in how someone will REACT to an act. They are easy to spot despite whatever chaos or how ever many "factors" could exist around a person.

    So basically just watching peoples reactions for a little while tells you a shit load about their psyche.


    This is my own theory, and not related to enneagram. I don't know how to describe it more or make it more clear, because each example where I have used this and been accurate, is greatly individualized to the person and the exact situation at the time.

    So broad understanding, multiple possibilities, one theory connecting everything together, resulting in predictability.

  3. #13
    Senior Member IndyGhost's Avatar
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    THAT I can pull a bit more sense from. It's basically how I've thought of the instinctual variants myself.

    Well... lemme make sure I actually understand what you mean and am not misinterpreting.

    I am not going to act the same while chatting someone up at a bar that I would if someone is chasing me.

    Or maybe I would, then that would give a very simple answer to a complex reaction...I am afraid to be open in love or fear losing myself.
    It's usually easier for me to understand via examples and then clarification... so I'll go with this one: There's a guy I find attractive, but I don't know him very well. However, I messaged him via Facebook the other day and told him he was in a dream of mine. I thought it might be an interesting way to initiate contact... see where it might lead... but then I was worried he'd just think me weird and creepy. He messaged me back and said he was glad I said dream and not nightmare. I ran into him a day or two later. However, I was horribly embarrassed about having messaged him in the first place. So, I left and met up with some friends. Later in the evening (bar hopping, btw), ran into him again. This time I was with my friends and I was just trying to avoid him. He approached me and asked if I had any more dreams. I told him "no," and apologized for having ignored him most of the night, and told him I was mostly embarrassed. He asked what I was up to, and I told him just hopping around, but that I would probably wind up at this particular bar later, because a friends band was playing. He wound up there later, as well. I wanted to talk to him, but was amongst friends and this time would have been embarrassed to approach him and talk it up, whilst in the company of my friends. So, I didn't talk to him at all.

    I can't decide... is this SX, SP, or SO in action? Or am I completely misunderstanding the point of the variants all together.

    On the part of this particular guy, I very much sense SX and SO. The first time I was introduced to him he was very intense and immediately asked me many questions to get to know me. It sort of took me aback, though I found him attractive immediately. I think I was very curt in my responses and came off as uninterested.

    As far as instincts go, what do you see being at play in your opinion, if that's anything to go off of?
    "I don't know a perfect person.
    I only know flawed people who are still worth loving."
    -John Green

  4. #14
    ThatGirl
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    Ha!

    Easily reproduction and status.

    Sounds like you like the guy, but then your main focus turns to the status of the interaction. Figuring out the roles, when should something be said, done, don't say too much.

    Sounds like your main concern is to appear in a acceptable manner, regardless if it gains or costs you the relationship.

    Because of this, until you get more comfortable and less concerned with status you will probably feel off in your interactions or seem somewhat inconsistent until you sort out your role, or suddenly become okay with being yourself, regardless of the consequence.

    Like I said status has elements of reproduction and self preservation in bits. Though it is an instinct all of its own as it very much leads to a different reaction than either of the other two.


    The more time I would have to analyze the way you disengage each of these variants the more I would be able to accurately predict what you will do next.

  5. #15
    Senior Member IndyGhost's Avatar
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    Sorting out my role definitely resonates a lot with me and my interactions with people.

    And yes! I feel as though each of the instincts have tidbits of the others.

    However, I do feel a strong pull towards SP as well... but maybe I'm confusing this with my mbti (being an introvert) and being an e4 (need for identity). The reason I believe that SP is very much me, also, is because whenever I'm overly involved in a relationship or even just spend too much time with friends, I tend to feel as though I become super merged with them. In romantic relationships, I do love that aspect. I am definitely a romantic and yearn for a deep and meaningful and unique relationship with a soul mate. However, when actually in a romantic relationship, and though I love feeling in love... I also start to feel an identity crisis... feel as though I lose myself in the relationship. I then become torn between wanting to remain in love and wanting to escape and be completely independent of the relationship. This is why I so often withdraw, because it is when I withdraw from others that I feel most myself. I've been single for the past year, and though I continue to yearn to be in a relationship and find myself with many crushes... I also know that this year has been the most stable for me. And it's because I've been alone and been able to reconnect with myself. This is why I originally thought I was more SX/SP. But I do definitely have that pull towards not coming off as a freak in the public eye. I also overanalyze my interactions with others. So, I just remain torn on what I think of these instincts.

    With my example earlier, you said you believe that it was SX and SO at play... but perhaps with SO a bit more strongly? Would this imply, simply from the one example, that you believe me to be more SO, so far?
    "I don't know a perfect person.
    I only know flawed people who are still worth loving."
    -John Green

  6. #16
    ThatGirl
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    Ah, I see. I don't believe you to be SO. I think in that situation yes you were coming from a heavy SO dominated stance.

    I'll try to get back to you a little later with a better explanation right now...headache.

  7. #17
    Just a statistic rhinosaur's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Giggly View Post
    Fixed. Try again.
    Thanks.

    Sexual |||||||||||| 34%
    Social |||||||||||| 38%
    Self Preservation |||||||||||||||||| 54%

    Pretty much exactly what I expected.

  8. #18
    Certified Sausage Smoker Elfboy's Avatar
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    wow, you guys are so balanced. my stacking is blatantly obvious
    Self Preservation: 90%
    Sexual: 62%
    Social: 10%

  9. #19

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    Sexual ||||||||||||||||||||| 62%
    Social |||||||||||| 34%
    Self Preservation |||||||||||||||||| 58%

    I can see that sp and sx affect me most. And I relate to both sp/sx and sx/sp descriptions of nine. I can see how I am a blend of these.

  10. #20

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    Quote Originally Posted by IndyAnnaJoan View Post
    I can't decide... is this SX, SP, or SO in action? Or am I completely misunderstanding the point of the variants all together.
    Maybe it is SO. I was just thinking how when I am into talking to someone I tend to close off everything in my surroundings and only pay attention to them.  

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