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  1. #51
    The Black Knight Domino's Avatar
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    I feel like I'm bleeding into someone else, like colors running in the rain. And it's completely involuntary, which is why I have to make a concerted effort to avoid toxic people, no matter how attracted/drawn to them I am because I can get enmeshed so deeply with them down to a cellular level. It's like being under a spell. I've depended on my friends and my sister to jerk me away from the fire when I get entranced. I really do need their help. The complusion to "merge" is too strong for me to overcome sometimes. As I've gotten older, I can brace myself and hold onto something and escape the black hole, but it comes at a big price. Avoidance of (or never knowing) these sorts of people is key. If I can't, I have to dig deep and say NO NO NO in my mind until I can step away because the compulsion to merge is that strong - like getting into their brain and their soul and reading their inner mail.

    If it's a good person, then it's a mind-meld. As someone else said, I want to crawl inside their skin. I can tell when I'm responding to another sx - the vibe is specific, like two bodysnatchers. And it can have zero to do with sex, as such. It can be a soul connection, a powerful merging of spirits and minds. I have many of those. The physical only enters in when there's a mutual chemical/bodily attraction. When that happens, it's like being knocked right off your feet.
    eNFJ 4w3 sx/so 468 tritype
    Neutral Good
    EII-Fi subtype, Ethical/Empath, Delta/Beta
    RLUEI, Choleric/Melancholic
    Inquistive/Limbic
    AIS Holland code
    Researcher: VDI-P
    Dramatic>Sensitive>Serious

  2. #52
    brainheart
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    Wow. I really relate to state's post. Maybe I'm not a social dom...

  3. #53
    brainheart
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    Does merging only apply to sexual attraction or just people in general?
    I don't like the term, 'merging'. I like to get to know those who I feel a connection to intimately. I want to know everything about them. And I want to share everything about me with them.

    How often does that usually happen?
    It is very rare. That's why it wields so much power over me.

    I wonder if Sx first would more likely to experience this merging of people than Sx second.
    I like to think this merging thing doesn't happen to me, but now I realize... part of the chorus of one of the heartbreak songs I've written is, "... we were the same, 'til you escaped my in." My thing is, I think I've made that sort of connection with someone. And when I realize it isn't mutual, it's devastating. It feels like it 'has to be' to me, like there is no alternative. I forget the other person has equal say in the matter.

  4. #54
    にゃん runvardh's Avatar
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    Bad Kitty: Well you see...

    Good Kitty: Um, I'm just going to not let you read any of that, because... well, it just ain't right and you will need some serious mind bleach after-wards... You'll thank me, really. It's seriously not appropriate for public consumption at all... Trust me...

    Bad Kitty: ... and that's how it works =^.^=
    Dreams are best served manifest and tangible.

    INFP, 6w7, IEI

    I accept no responsibility, what so ever, for the fact that I exist; I do, however, accept full responsibility for what I do while I exist.

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  5. #55
    Senior Member tinker683's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Goosebump View Post
    Does merging only apply to sexual attraction or just people in general?
    People in general. I've had this feeling not just with women but with men as well. It's not based on anything sexual, just admiration and respect is all I need.

    Quote Originally Posted by Goosebump View Post
    How do Sx know when they merge with someone?
    I never when it's about to happen but only that it has. Then it's like, "Wow, I understand this person in a very deep, meaningful way."

    Quote Originally Posted by Goosebump View Post
    What does it feel like to merge with someone?
    Like I'm almost able to hear their thoughts, to feel their emotions as they're feeling them. I've rarely have this happen but when it does...it's truly wonderful as I don't wish to let her once it's there

    Quote Originally Posted by Goosebump View Post
    How often does that usually happen?
    As I said, rarely.

    Quote Originally Posted by Goosebump View Post
    EDIT: Also, what is your instinctual variant?
    Sx/So, or thus sayth the test I took anyway. I've been told Sx/So is more of an extrovert variant combo but I dunno, the shoe seems to fit. I have a strong respect for social order but my greatest needs involves connecting with people. When I can't get that connection, I get really crabby and moody

    Maybe I'm an So/Sx, I dunno.

    Quote Originally Posted by Goosebump View Post
    I wonder if Sx first would more likely to experience this merging of people than Sx second.
    Perhaps...I don't know.
    "The man who is swimming against the stream knows the strength of it."
    ― Woodrow Wilson

  6. #56

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    How does Sx merge with another person?

    For me it is best explained by two people comfortably watching and sharing in the thrill and action of John Woo's Face Off.

  7. #57
    Permabanned
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    Quote Originally Posted by Domino View Post
    I feel like I'm bleeding into someone else, like colors running in the rain. And it's completely involuntary, which is why I have to make a concerted effort to avoid toxic people, no matter how attracted/drawn to them I am because I can get enmeshed so deeply with them down to a cellular level. It's like being under a spell. I've depended on my friends and my sister to jerk me away from the fire when I get entranced. I really do need their help. The complusion to "merge" is too strong for me to overcome sometimes. As I've gotten older, I can brace myself and hold onto something and escape the black hole, but it comes at a big price. Avoidance of (or never knowing) these sorts of people is key. If I can't, I have to dig deep and say NO NO NO in my mind until I can step away because the compulsion to merge is that strong - like getting into their brain and their soul and reading their inner mail.

    If it's a good person, then it's a mind-meld. As someone else said, I want to crawl inside their skin. I can tell when I'm responding to another sx - the vibe is specific, like two bodysnatchers. And it can have zero to do with sex, as such. It can be a soul connection, a powerful merging of spirits and minds. I have many of those. The physical only enters in when there's a mutual chemical/bodily attraction. When that happens, it's like being knocked right off your feet.
    For NTs, you feast on each others brains.

    Like zombies!

  8. #58
    meh Salomé's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Onceajoan View Post
    Salome - With all due respect, I think the feeling others feelings is a function of intuition and empathy.
    That was kind of my point...

    Quote Originally Posted by MacGuffin View Post
    For NTs, you feast on each others brains.
    That must be singularly unsatisfaying, in your case.
    Quote Originally Posted by Ivy View Post
    Gosh, the world looks so small from up here on my high horse of menstruation.

  9. #59
    The Black Knight Domino's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Salome View Post
    That must be singularly unsatisfaying, in your case.
    He's like Chinese food. One good burp and he's gone.
    eNFJ 4w3 sx/so 468 tritype
    Neutral Good
    EII-Fi subtype, Ethical/Empath, Delta/Beta
    RLUEI, Choleric/Melancholic
    Inquistive/Limbic
    AIS Holland code
    Researcher: VDI-P
    Dramatic>Sensitive>Serious

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