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[sp] Sp doms COME HERE!

Your enneagram instinctual stacking:


  • Total voters
    87

Uytuun

New member
Joined
Apr 19, 2008
Messages
1,633
MBTI Type
nnnn
cascadeo said:
I'm gonna talk about connection in general - not specific to romance. With romance, it would just be what I'm referring to below, plus a really intense physical attraction/chemistry.

All I can say is that my impression of some of the sx-doms on here, and a few irl I've been a total mismatch with in terms of romantic compatiblity, is that their intensity is focused towards expression of feeling, of vulnerability, a willingness to plunge into the depths of.. whatever.. and expose and be naked and all-known to the other. Much more personalized.. 1:1 intensity, desire to share all inner workings, little to no boundaries or walls, a desire to merge completely with the other person.

A connection for me tends to revolve around an acceptance and sharing of ideas, thoughts, perspectives, and such. Not so personal, not tied to Me necessarily/specifically. Very idea/concept based; not centralized around my own inner workings or emotions. Yes, I express my emotions and personal fears/issues at times, but it's usually more of a declaration...'this is where I'm at'... I don't really want to 'explore' them with another. I basically handle these things in-house and they're not things I tend to want others to help me navigate through, nor do I really think they're pertinent/necessary for others to know about, if they don't really impact the Relationship itself.

Connection is also a blending of personalities... a good back-and-forth, both people giving and taking and interested in one another, really appreciating/caring/loving one another.

I would imagine a dom-sx might get frustrated with me, thinking they're not really seeing 'Me' or getting to know me because I DO sort through a lot of my personal stuff in-house and don't talk it out, and I also tend not to talk about myself or my issues/questions/problems in detail at all - just vague generalities - statements of fact, almost - not really wanting to discuss them - so truthfully I just don't connect that way and my best friends are ones who I have excellent conversations with, however, the content of the conversations just have very little to do with where I'm at internally. Unless I'm wanting input. But it's just input - not exploratory or anything. Almost clinical? Not vulnerable/raw.

If I can share my thoughts/ideas, and be understood/accepted, and vice versa, that tends to equate to a Big Connection. Connection = Intellectual & personality acceptance for me, I think. Big picture stuff; not based on them knowing everything about me or me knowing everything about them. It's like... knowing enough of their general characteristics and traits, but not needing/desiring the nitty-gritty inner workings/psychae. More intuitive? Blah, what a silly ramble this is. And I don't think I'm really getting at the key differences... I can't really put my finger on it, I just know I'm really different from dom-sx, and I think even aux-sx, so my conversational focus/'desire'/need must be quite different too.

It was an interesting ramble! I do very much want to explore inner workings with an SO - I've always attributed it to Fi. With friends I'm much more like you describe.
 

Tiltyred

New member
Joined
Dec 1, 2008
Messages
4,322
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
468
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
4w5 sp
Yeah to what the others of my kind said.
 

Salomé

meh
Joined
Sep 25, 2008
Messages
10,527
MBTI Type
INTP
Enneagram
5w4
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
I was going over the people in this thread who were Sp doms earlier and noting that it's often people who I can like just as much as anyone but feel they are unreachable in a way
I was thinking the very same thing...:yes:
 
G

Glycerine

Guest
I think it makes come off cold/ somewhat abrasive. I don't relate to many Fe doms but I know I am one. I'm 3w4 SP/SO. From afar, people might type me as a T.
 

Fluffywolf

Nips away your dignity
Joined
Mar 31, 2009
Messages
9,581
MBTI Type
INTP
Enneagram
9
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
I was going over the people in this thread who were Sp doms earlier and noting that it's often people who I can like just as much as anyone but feel they are unreachable in a way

Odd, I consider myself extremely easy to reach. Just very hard to obtain. :smile:
 

Kasper

Diabolical
Joined
May 30, 2008
Messages
11,590
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
9w8
Instinctual Variant
so/sx
I don't know how this translates to my real life... I like my friends and run away from them to talk to strangers frequently :ninja:

Hehe, totally get that, kinda sums things up for me rather well.


If I can share my thoughts/ideas, and be understood/accepted, and vice versa, that tends to equate to a Big Connection. Connection = Intellectual & personality acceptance for me, I think. Big picture stuff; not based on them knowing everything about me or me knowing everything about them. It's like... knowing enough of their general characteristics and traits, but not needing/desiring the nitty-gritty inner workings/psychae.

I relate to most of that, although I do have a strong desire to figure out exactly what makes other people tick.
 

cascadeco

New member
Joined
Oct 7, 2007
Messages
9,083
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
9w1
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
It was an interesting ramble! I do very much want to explore inner workings with an SO - I've always attributed it to Fi. With friends I'm much more like you describe.

haha, thanks. And truthfully it's hard for me to gauge what I might *really* be like with an SO who I was really close to, as I'm not sure I've ever truly experienced that.

Trinity said:
I relate to most of that, although I do have a strong desire to figure out exactly what makes other people tick.

I really like to learn what makes people tick as well, but I feel like my method isn't as... invasive?.. as some. I don't push. If people voluntary talk about it, then I'll probably feel honored. But I think the distinction (probably due to sp/so) is that I may not feel the need/desire to reciprocate on the same level. Going back to what I said earlier.
 

Kasper

Diabolical
Joined
May 30, 2008
Messages
11,590
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
9w8
Instinctual Variant
so/sx
But I think the distinction (probably due to sp/so) is that I may not feel the need/desire to reciprocate on the same level. Going back to what I said earlier.

Yup, in true ENTP style I can be quite invasive when pushing others into revealing things, and I can be quite open myself if I want to be, it's my investment in what I'm telling them that isn't on the same level, it rarely makes me feel "closer" to them and it's rarely anything that I'm not comfortable telling any old stranger.
 

miss fortune

not to be trusted
Joined
Oct 4, 2007
Messages
20,589
Enneagram
827
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
I'll appear to be open to others, but I'm not... I'll admit to some of the most horrible things because they're really not that big of a deal to me, but anything that I feel is important is usually well hidden :blush:
 

CuriousFeeling

From the Undertow
Joined
Dec 18, 2009
Messages
2,937
MBTI Type
INfJ
Enneagram
4w5
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
Took me a bit to figure out my instinctual variant... but I'm fairly sure I'm a 4w5 sp/so.
 

William K

Uniqueorn
Joined
Aug 13, 2009
Messages
986
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
4w5
Sad that only 4 people want to screw us Sp's.... :D
 

Uytuun

New member
Joined
Apr 19, 2008
Messages
1,633
MBTI Type
nnnn
I like how the 2nd part of each thread title reflects the instinctual variant. Was it done on purpose?

sx - come to me
sp - come here
so - join our group
 

Kasper

Diabolical
Joined
May 30, 2008
Messages
11,590
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
9w8
Instinctual Variant
so/sx
I like how the 2nd part of each thread title reflects the instinctual variant. Was it done on purpose?

sx - come to me
sp - come here
so - join our group

Hehe, the sp one wasn't done on purpose but it is fitting!
 

PeaceBaby

reborn
Joined
Jan 7, 2009
Messages
5,950
MBTI Type
N/A
Enneagram
N/A
I like how the 2nd part of each thread title reflects the instinctual variant. Was it done on purpose?

sx - come to me
sp - come here
so - join our group

I did the So one last, therefore had the advantage of seeing the other two titles and tailoring my own to fit.

SO ya, I did it intentionally.
 

wolfy

awsm
Joined
Jun 30, 2008
Messages
12,251
I like "Sp-Bring a Plate"

I was looking up some instinct stuff and found this site Dave's Enneagram. Nice clean site with resources collected from the net.
 

WoodsWoman

New member
Joined
Dec 24, 2007
Messages
778
MBTI Type
INFP
For myself it was what BlackCat posted in the Descriptions of the Enneagram thread - almost all of this resonates with me:
sp/sx

These people often have an earthy, mysterious quality to them. They are quietly intense, but to others may seem oblivious to the greater social world around them, instead favoring personal interests. They are slow to commit, but once they do it is with an attitude of life commitment, to the establishment of an impermeable bond. Others can be taken aback by how suddenly and completely this type can lock into them, and by the depth of understanding of the others condition. They attach to others at an organic, root level, in contrast to the other sub-variants surface formality. Somewhat hesitant to enter new relationships, they instead preserve the select few enduring bonds they carefully form along the way. The sanctuary of home is of paramount concern, and this type takes particular delight in decorating their spaces to reflect their cherished sense of taste and depth. Depth and discrimination characterize this stacking.
 

INA

now! in shell form
Joined
Jun 6, 2008
Messages
3,195
MBTI Type
intp
Not even close:

Sexual ||||||||| 30%
Social ||||||||||||||| 46%
Self Preservation |||||||||||||||||||||||||||| 86%

This means pure SP, no? I can't vote.

Shouldn't it be "Sp-Get away from me"?

+1
The main challenge in life.
 
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