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  1. #1
    Temporal Mechanic. Lexicon's Avatar
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    Default How the hell do I remove B.O. from a piece of furniture?

    So a close hippie friend of mine tends to be a bit more pungent in the summer, since she doesn't wear deodorant or shave her underarms.

    Typically, that doesn't bother me in the least. Natural body smells aren't offensive - when they're fresh, I mean.

    Couple that bohemian nature with a major depressive episode, though.. it can get pretty bad. Happened in-through August. I had her come over a lot, to keep her from isolating too much, as that tends to worsen the episode. She didn't shower for nearly a month. I tried to encourage her without shaming/pressuring, but in the end it was up to her.

    I didn't want it to become an excuse for her to isolate, if I mentioned the couch was starting to smell, so I figured I'd just wait out the storm & clean the damn couch later. How hard could it be?


    She did eventually emerge from the episode, so, obviously that's great for a million reasons. She's stopped neglecting her hygiene so severely, & is generally more active, seems to be coping better.


    Anyway, the cushion covers were easy to take care of, as one does with regular laundry, but the part you rest your back against... Reeks. I mean, it's a very strong sweat smell, detectable even when you just sit down. I realized the other day that the back of a sweatshirt I had on while sitting smelled like the couch's sweat odor.

    I love my friend, I don't mind if she gets stinky sometimes, but I don't want it rubbing off on me. I don't want to smell her after she's left.

    I've tried alcohol, febreeze, Lysol, pine sol mixed with tea tree oil & borax, rubbed baking soda into the fibers... Nothing seems to work. I've been trying to fix this for almost a month, now.

    Any ideas?
    03/23 06:06:58 EcK: lex
    03/23 06:06:59 EcK: lex
    03/23 06:21:34 Nancynobullets: LEXXX *sacrifices a first born*
    03/23 06:21:53 Nancynobullets: We summon yooouuu
    03/23 06:29:07 Lexicon: I was sleeping!



    04/25 04:20:35 Patches: Don't listen to lex. She wants to birth a litter of kittens. She doesnt get to decide whats creepy

    02/16 23:49:38 ygolo: Lex is afk
    02/16 23:49:45 Cimarron: she's doing drugs with Jack

    03/05 19:27:41 Time: You can't make chat morbid. Lex does it naturally.

  2. #2
    Meat Tornado DiscoBiscuit's Avatar
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    Burn it

  3. #3
    Butterfly Amargith's Avatar
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    Go to the pet store.

    Get yourself a bottle of enzymatic cleaner - it's the shit they get cat pee out with and breaks down the odor on a molecular level.

    Then try it on a small patch of your couch to see if its stains.

    Alternatively, go to a furniture store. Ask them for a spray to clean the couch with - I have one, it works miracles. I'm not sure it would work for odours as wel, but ask them. I *think* they use enzymes as well, to be that effective.
    ★ڿڰۣ✿ℒoѵℯ✿ڿڰۣ★





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  4. #4
    Temporal Mechanic. Lexicon's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Amargith View Post
    Go to the pet store.

    Get yourself a bottle of enzymatic cleaner - it's the shit they get cat pee out with and breaks down the odor on a molecular level.

    Then try it on a small patch of your couch to see if its stains.

    Alternatively, go to a furniture store. Ask them for a spray to clean the couch with - I have one, it works miracles. I'm not sure it would work for doors as wel, but ask them. I *think* they use enzymes as well, to be that effective.

    Excellent idea, amar. I know of a good enzymatic cleaner from when Jack used to pee over the edge of his litter box.. Manly cat just HAD to pee standing up. It worked wonders on the wood floor. Used it on my friend's kid's mattress after she wet the bed a few yrs ago, too.

    Totally forgot that existed.

    The couch is dark blue, so yeah, a test spot will definitely be required.

    Once again, you come to the rescue. Thanks!

    I'll post whatever ends up working, so if anyone else encounters this issue, they'll have some options. I never had smells leech so intensely into something like this before, except for when the family dog got sprayed by a skunk, but baking soda got rid of that.
    03/23 06:06:58 EcK: lex
    03/23 06:06:59 EcK: lex
    03/23 06:21:34 Nancynobullets: LEXXX *sacrifices a first born*
    03/23 06:21:53 Nancynobullets: We summon yooouuu
    03/23 06:29:07 Lexicon: I was sleeping!



    04/25 04:20:35 Patches: Don't listen to lex. She wants to birth a litter of kittens. She doesnt get to decide whats creepy

    02/16 23:49:38 ygolo: Lex is afk
    02/16 23:49:45 Cimarron: she's doing drugs with Jack

    03/05 19:27:41 Time: You can't make chat morbid. Lex does it naturally.

  5. #5
    Egad! No bondage! Obfuscate's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Amargith View Post
    Go to the pet store.

    Get yourself a bottle of enzymatic cleaner - it's the shit they get cat pee out with and breaks down the odor on a molecular level.

    Then try it on a small patch of your couch to see if its stains.

    Alternatively, go to a furniture store. Ask them for a spray to clean the couch with - I have one, it works miracles. I'm not sure it would work for odours as wel, but ask them. I *think* they use enzymes as well, to be that effective.
    this....
    "The vanity of intelligence is that the intelligent man is often more committed to 'one-upping' his opponent than being truthful. When the idea of intelligence, rather than intelligence itself, becomes a staple, there is no wisdom in it."
    Criss Jami

    "When dealing with people, remember you are not dealing with creatures of logic, but creatures of emotion."
    "Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain but it takes character and self control to be understanding and forgiving."
    Dale Carnegie

  6. #6
    Who Am I? Forever's Avatar
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    Baking soda + vinegar. It'll get the job done I believe. Well should you have problems in the far future and don't feel like going to the store to get the enzymatic cleaner.
    F O R E V E R


    When it matters, everyone's the same.



    Likes ~MS*ANGEL~ liked this post

  7. #7
    Temporal Mechanic. Lexicon's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Forever View Post
    Baking soda + vinegar. It'll get the job done I believe. Well should you have problems in the far future and don't feel like going to the store to get the enzymatic cleaner.
    Thanks for that - I forgot to mention that combo in my 1st post, actually. That was ineffective on the B.O., unfortunately, but it had worked in the past for skunk spray, so it's definitely a useful deodorizer for a lot of other stuff.
    03/23 06:06:58 EcK: lex
    03/23 06:06:59 EcK: lex
    03/23 06:21:34 Nancynobullets: LEXXX *sacrifices a first born*
    03/23 06:21:53 Nancynobullets: We summon yooouuu
    03/23 06:29:07 Lexicon: I was sleeping!



    04/25 04:20:35 Patches: Don't listen to lex. She wants to birth a litter of kittens. She doesnt get to decide whats creepy

    02/16 23:49:38 ygolo: Lex is afk
    02/16 23:49:45 Cimarron: she's doing drugs with Jack

    03/05 19:27:41 Time: You can't make chat morbid. Lex does it naturally.

  8. #8
    Temporal Mechanic. Lexicon's Avatar
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    What ended up working was lightly spraying the couch twice (after testing an area) with some Rescue disinfectant (formerly known as Accel disinfectant). Main ingredient is accelerated hydrogen peroxide. I have a gallon of the concentrate leftover from the kitty's Ringworm Fungal Plague. The vet recommended it over bleach for more reliable disinfection/eradication of spores, & it made all the difference.

    I didn't try it sooner because I assumed with the main ingredient being AHP, discoloration was guaranteed, but that doesn't appear to be the case.

    Caused no damage to the couch, at all, & the odor is completely fucking gone. What can't this stuff do.

    It's about $50 per gallon concentrate, but you get 64 (32oz) spray bottles out of it at its 1:16 dilution, which kills the worst viruses/bacteria/fungi. Long-term it actually saves you money, I think - when compared to the average variety of $3 32oz less broad-spectrum disinfectants you can find in stores. More reliable, stable, & apparently much better for the environment, too, but, I digress.

    http://www.viroxanimalhealth.com/fil...ct%20Sheet.pdf
    03/23 06:06:58 EcK: lex
    03/23 06:06:59 EcK: lex
    03/23 06:21:34 Nancynobullets: LEXXX *sacrifices a first born*
    03/23 06:21:53 Nancynobullets: We summon yooouuu
    03/23 06:29:07 Lexicon: I was sleeping!



    04/25 04:20:35 Patches: Don't listen to lex. She wants to birth a litter of kittens. She doesnt get to decide whats creepy

    02/16 23:49:38 ygolo: Lex is afk
    02/16 23:49:45 Cimarron: she's doing drugs with Jack

    03/05 19:27:41 Time: You can't make chat morbid. Lex does it naturally.
    Likes that's not my name, Forever liked this post

  9. #9
    Who Am I? Forever's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lexicon View Post
    Thanks for that - I forgot to mention that combo in my 1st post, actually. That was ineffective on the B.O., unfortunately, but it had worked in the past for skunk spray, so it's definitely a useful deodorizer for a lot of other stuff.
    Good to know it worked for some things. Sorry you had to undergo such hardship though.
    F O R E V E R


    When it matters, everyone's the same.




  10. #10
    Temporal Mechanic. Lexicon's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Forever View Post
    Good to know it worked for some things. Sorry you had to undergo such hardship though.
    Thanks - no biggie, though. Bad smells aren't the worst thing in the world, though they can definitely be a pain, haha. I'm more concerned about my friend's health, but it's nice to be able to fix something in my own space for a little peace of mind- even it's just a couch.
    03/23 06:06:58 EcK: lex
    03/23 06:06:59 EcK: lex
    03/23 06:21:34 Nancynobullets: LEXXX *sacrifices a first born*
    03/23 06:21:53 Nancynobullets: We summon yooouuu
    03/23 06:29:07 Lexicon: I was sleeping!



    04/25 04:20:35 Patches: Don't listen to lex. She wants to birth a litter of kittens. She doesnt get to decide whats creepy

    02/16 23:49:38 ygolo: Lex is afk
    02/16 23:49:45 Cimarron: she's doing drugs with Jack

    03/05 19:27:41 Time: You can't make chat morbid. Lex does it naturally.
    Likes SurrealisticSlumbers liked this post

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