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Cooking Flops

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NPcomplete

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I forgot the first moussaka I made. It should have been called béchamel sauce failure instead. Or even perhaps the-evening-I-temporarily-gave-away-my-brain incident.

Good thing, I am a better baker/cook now.
 

Cimarron

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Nothing really significant yet.

When I tried making French toast for the first time, it took me about 4 or 5 tries before I got it right.
 

gromit

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I've had a case of spoon cookie flops. Carefully formed and arranged dough ended up covering the whole pan when it came out of the oven. Nothing nifty moves with a knife wouldn't save though. The square cookies tasted great. :laugh:
Hahaha... that has happened to me with pancakes!

the first time i made pavlova the meringue turned into a disgusting crusty soup. a pavlova for the uninitiated is a meringue that is stiff and crisp on the outside with soft fluffy insides topped with cream and fruit.
:drool:
 
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A few weeks ago, I tried caramel bread. It was the first time I tried to make caramel myself, so I managed to burn it... then I went and burnt the bread, too. I'll try again, I'm sure...

I just learned a ridiculously easy way to make caramel that's way less dangerous and subject to burning. Just take a few cans of sweetened condensed milk and put them in a pot totally submerged in water. Bring the water to a boil and then put the pot in the oven at 275 for 3.5 hours. The cans will keep indefinitely, and when you open them up the milk will have magically turned to caramel. Mmmm.
 

wolfy

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the first time i made pavlova the meringue turned into a disgusting crusty soup. a pavlova for the uninitiated is a meringue that is stiff and crisp on the outside with soft fluffy insides topped with cream and fruit.

i've since learnt that you must add the sugar into the egg whites super slowly (a spoonful at a time) and then beat it like you mean it between adding spoonfuls of sugar. you can test whether you've beaten it thoroughly enough by rubbing a little bit of the mix between your thumb and finger - if it feels gritty, keep beating.

my first one did not look like this

4258_MEDIUM.jpg

Yeah, pavlova can be hard, good tip. Now I am wanting pavlova. My oven doesn't go low enough but I am going to find a way. I want pavlova, cream and kiwifruit, and I will have it.
 

Chaotic Harmony

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Nothing really significant yet.

When I tried making French toast for the first time, it took me about 4 or 5 tries before I got it right.

Ugh... French Toast is my worst nightmare. I still haven't got it figured out. It's always a giant inedible mess by the time I'm done experimenting. :doh:
 

gromit

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I just learned a ridiculously easy way to make caramel that's way less dangerous and subject to burning. Just take a few cans of sweetened condensed milk and put them in a pot totally submerged in water. Bring the water to a boil and then put the pot in the oven at 275 for 3.5 hours. The cans will keep indefinitely, and when you open them up the milk will have magically turned to caramel. Mmmm.
I do not believe you.

Ugh... French Toast is my worst nightmare. I still haven't got it figured out. It's always a giant inedible mess by the time I'm done experimenting. :doh:
Wait, how do you go about doing it?
 

Chaotic Harmony

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Wait, how do you go about doing it?

I watched some cooking show that made it look oh so easy... So I dug my bread out... I'm thinking maybe I should have used some thicker sliced bread or something... However, I went with the only bread I had... Dipped one side into the eggs and then threw it on the stove top (well, in a pan on the stovetop). I barely put it in and my egg mixture soaked all the way through the damn bread. :shock:


It's been about two years since I've attempted it, so I don't remember how hot I had everything... Or any real details...
 

gromit

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TOO BAD. I wish you lived nearby then we could make it together. Believe it or not it's one of the first foods I ever learned to prepare. :laugh:
 

Chaotic Harmony

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TOO BAD. I wish you lived nearby then we could make it together. Believe it or not it's one of the first foods I ever learned to prepare. :laugh:

Man, if that would have been my first I would have never returned to the kitchen! My mom couldn't keep me out of the kitchen when I was 10... No matter how many times she told me to leave the stove and oven alone I was determined I was going to fix my own meals after school.

Tee hee, I remember my first run in with making mashed potatoes... First I wasn't paying attention and half the water ended up boiling over on the stove... And then I didn't let it boil long enough so mashing the potatoes was one helluva task...
 

Tiltyred

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I've only ever seen Pavlova when Nigella makes it on tv. Man, I want me some of that. It looks so delicious!
 

CuriousFeeling

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There was the one time when I wanted to make chocolate dipped strawberries, got the recipe on Cooks.com. and I followed the recipe for melted chocolate verbatim. The melted chocolate turned to the consistency of fudge brownies. The problem was that the recipe substituted butter for vegetable oil. Epic fail.
 

sculpting

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i used to try and make christmas fudge now and then. (Yes I know) I am a terrible cook and I never have right type of cooking tools.

As a result I have screwed up fudge in very way possible. But the very best fudge ever was when I cook mac n' cheese in a pot, but didnt do a good job cleaning the pot. When I took out it had a film of cheesy oil on the inside of the pot, but I forged ahead bravely.

It was awesome as none of the fudge crystallized, and it ended up being exceptionally creamy and delightful.

This much better than the time I poured oil in a hot pain and had 3 feet tall flames or the time I set my sister's stove on fire with one of those cardboard roll boxes....
 

Fan.of.Devin

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My homemade alfredo sauces continue to turn out sub-par. : (
They're more gloppy and thin than they are creamy, and upon reheating, it turns into a bowl of pasta sitting in a puddle of butter.
I think I need change the butter to cream/cheese ratio... More cream.
 

Chaotic Harmony

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My homemade alfredo sauces continue to turn out sub-par. : (
They're more gloppy and thin than they are creamy, and upon reheating, it turns into a bowl of pasta sitting in a puddle of butter.
I think I need change the butter to cream/cheese ratio... More cream.

My alfredo turns out pretty good at the time... But yeah, if I try and reheat it's like noodles swimming in a buttery substance....
 

Randomnity

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This much better than the time I poured oil in a hot pain and had 3 feet tall flames
My roommate did this once. I was mad. How does that seem like a good idea? lol

Most of my cooking flops are easily summarized into "leaves kitchen while food cooks for (insert time >10 min), makes a mental note to check on pot in a few mins, gets distracted, comes back to burning smells, ruined food" no flames yet but I'm waiting :doh:
 

entropie

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Tried to make Tafelspitz ( boilet fillet of beef ? ) and was steam cooking it with only a bit of water. Later I figured the lid had a little opening to vent steam *lol*.

Went wrong badly in the kitchen there was black smoke and the fillet itself went dark black on the bottom :/
 
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My homemade alfredo sauces continue to turn out sub-par. : (
They're more gloppy and thin than they are creamy, and upon reheating, it turns into a bowl of pasta sitting in a puddle of butter.
I think I need change the butter to cream/cheese ratio... More cream.

Fettucine Alfredo should never be reheated, there's no way to make it good...frankly, the dish only lasts a short while after it's made, so it should be served immediately. Try this recipe, it's simple and excellent. Has never failed me. You're right to suspect that you need more cream. Another tip is to use the best parmesan you can find. You don't need a lot of it, so even the good stuff (@$18/lb) should be affordable as a once in a while treat.


Fettucine Alfredo recipe from America's Test Kitchen
 

Chaotic Harmony

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My roommate did this once. I was mad. How does that seem like a good idea? lol

Most of my cooking flops are easily summarized into "leaves kitchen while food cooks for (insert time >10 min), makes a mental note to check on pot in a few mins, gets distracted, comes back to burning smells, ruined food" no flames yet but I'm waiting :doh:

Just don't do what this guy that lived in my old apartment complex did.... We woke up at 4 AM to about three fire trucks surrounding out apartment complex trying to put out a fire... The genius decided it'd be a good idea to come home drunk and cook a pizza... The only problem was he passed out in the process and the apartment caught fire... :steam:
 

Fan.of.Devin

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Fettucine Alfredo should never be reheated, there's no way to make it good...frankly, the dish only lasts a short while after it's made, so it should be served immediately. Try this recipe, it's simple and excellent. Has never failed me. You're right to suspect that you need more cream. Another tip is to use the best parmesan you can find. You don't need a lot of it, so even the good stuff (@$18/lb) should be affordable as a once in a while treat.


Fettucine Alfredo recipe from America's Test Kitchen
The stuff I get from restaurants usually stands up fairly well to reheating...
Makes me wonder what they do differently.

I've seen a lot of alfredo sauce recipes that call for cream cheese to be added, but that just sounds horrible... >_>
 
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