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Thread: Cooking Flops

  1. #11
    Starcrossed Seafarer Array Aquarelle's Avatar
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    Jun 2010


    One time I decided I was going to try this recipe for hazelnut soup. It was from an American Indian cookbook. But it apparently was meant to feed the entire tribe - it made 24 servings, and was supposed to simmer for like 4 hours!! So I divided everything by 4 and made it for 6.

    That was fine, except I didn't think to reduce the cooking time. About an hour into the simmering, my roommate chanced to walk by the pot... and notice that almost all the liquid had boiled away.

    We ate it anyway. It actually didn't taste too bad!
    Masquerading as a normal person day after day is exhausting.

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  2. #12
    Patron Saint Of Smileys Array Gloriana's Avatar
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    Aug 2009


    Quote Originally Posted by Kymbirleigh View Post

    Oh man... I remember when I was in middle school, I baked a cake...or at least tried to... It was the flattest cake I had ever seen... I think I left out the water and it ended up being like a half an inch thick. It tasted okay...but it was super thin...

    Ahaha! I've done this too. I did it trying to make a cake for my family for July 4th. I wound up with three chocolate 'discs' that were almost like brownies. My brother and aunt wouldn't touch them but my mother and I cut them up into triangles and dipped them in the frosting I had already made. It was not too shabby!
    "Nobody in life gets exactly what they thought they were going to get, but if you work really hard, and you're kind, amazing things will happen. I'm telling you...amazing things will happen" --Conan O'Brien

  3. #13


    Heheh... one time we tried to make gumdrops but apparently it was a different kind of pectin than they used in the recipe, and I guess we didn't use enough, so they really WERE flops.

    Your kisses, sweeter than honey. But guess what, so is my money.

  4. #14


    I've had a case of spoon cookie flops. Carefully formed and arranged dough ended up covering the whole pan when it came out of the oven. Nothing nifty moves with a knife wouldn't save though. The square cookies tasted great.

  5. #15
    shadow boxer Array strawberries's Avatar
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    Apr 2010


    the first time i made pavlova the meringue turned into a disgusting crusty soup. a pavlova for the uninitiated is a meringue that is stiff and crisp on the outside with soft fluffy insides topped with cream and fruit.

    i've since learnt that you must add the sugar into the egg whites super slowly (a spoonful at a time) and then beat it like you mean it between adding spoonfuls of sugar. you can test whether you've beaten it thoroughly enough by rubbing a little bit of the mix between your thumb and finger - if it feels gritty, keep beating.

    my first one did not look like this

  6. #16
    scourge Array miss fortune's Avatar
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    Oct 2007
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    I've made bread without salt a few times by accident... thankfully I haven't done THAT lately that's too much work for something to turn out that disappointing!

    I also once dropped a pizza on the way into the oven... it was the saddest thing ever (well, sort of... it was the saddest thing at that particular moment!)
    Human beings make life so interesting. Do you know that in a universe so full of wonders, they have managed to invent boredom? -Terry Pratchett

  7. #17


    I tried to make fondant once and wound up with a solid lump of rock-hard sugar on my counter. I also had some chocolate seize when I accidentally dropped a little water in the pot. Neither are very pretty.
    Everybody have fun tonight. Everybody Wang Chung tonight.


  8. #18


    The first time I made gratin, I placed the dish too near the broil grill and set the whole thing on fire.

    Once I got carried away with my experimentation on a tapioca pudding and decided to add yogurt to it.

    Also, in my first baking attempts, I didn't realise that I was over-mixing the dough and everything was quite difficult to chew. Oh and I've also tried to block an incident involving sour cream and spinach. :eek:

  9. #19
    Symbolic Herald Array
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    Feb 2010


    Most "one pot meal" recipes (especially if they involve a crockpot) are fundamentally flawed.

    Once I attempted one kind of stew from one of those and the resulting mush meal was so icky and disappointing. I just happened to grab a wooden spoon to serve and it looked so much like the scene from Oliver with the gruel with this big wooden spoon that my sweetheart and I burst out laughing and started doing our best, "please, sir, can I have so more?" (although, truly we didn't want any more).

    This was long ago and I am a better cook now, and much more cynical about "one pot meal" recipes as a result.

  10. #20
    Senior Member Array ItsAGuy's Avatar
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    Aug 2010


    Quote Originally Posted by kyuuei View Post
    As much as I experiment in the kitchen, you can bet one out of every 5 or so new things fails miserably. I've blown things up in the oven, set things on fire, and just tonight we cooked this AWESOME riblet and shrimp grilled with vermicelli and ginger sauce salad... Except I tried a new marinade that was clearly too spicy for my entire family. Nothing on the label indicated it was spicy, but now we're all dying and acting like we were pepper sprayed

    So what'd you screw up on? Don't be shy!
    A few weeks ago, I tried caramel bread. It was the first time I tried to make caramel myself, so I managed to burn it... then I went and burnt the bread, too. I'll try again, I'm sure...

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