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Thread: Male Homemakers

  1. #51
    no clinkz 'til brooklyn Nocapszy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SubjectA View Post
    Stay-at-home dads are really looked down upon by their peers in today's society, and it's wrong.
    on the other hand, most stay at home dads are wimps, and their wives do "wear the pants" both figuratively and literally.

    i look down on those men.

    So what do you think of the idea? Would you be a stay at home dad if you had the choice?
    no 'cause that would mean i left the wife for not aborting the pregnancy.
    that is to say, i'd be the precise opposite of a stay at home dad.

    i'd be a never come home dad.

    you ignore the real issue:
    fuck kids.

    you're right about one thing -- those men who look down on stay at home dads 'cause they're pansies are wrong.
    they are.

    if they were truly concerned over male virility, they'd never have settled down to start a family in the first place.
    taking the next step and watching over them during the day isn't any worse.
    we fukin won boys

  2. #52
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    Men first need to feel comfortable with the role of stay at home, caring for their children, to make this a possiblity. Many women who become mothers wouldn't want roles reversed in this way because of the fact that most women have their own whatchamacallems come out of their bodies and are stuck with the hormonal influences, thereby concomittant breast engorgement, etc aftereffects. Who would want to part with their offspring at that time?

    Give a mother two to six weeks to recover the physiological association with said infant then you may be able to discuss parenting roles in a more objective manner. Some moms want to stay with their kid 24/7 and some don't. That's where the man could serve a useful purpose aka make a significant diversion from the ditchdigger mentality. In my case I'd rather have had my head skinned than to trade positions with father.

    Around age 4/5 of the child's life many mothers believe, rightfully so, their place in the family has become a little washed out. This may be due to the fact that the best shampoo they can afford begins with S. At any rate, calculation becomes a crucial thinking skill. Many women take classes at the local community college at this time. Just saying.

    will continue momentarily...

  3. #53
    Senior Member Alchemiss's Avatar
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    Personally I'd like to see society shift to where both parents have the freedom and financial wherewithal to share both raising of children *and* working - where some "stay-at-home" hours each week are just a de facto part of each parent's job description. It's a shame that both stay-at-home and working part-time are marginalized.

  4. #54
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    my feeling on childrearing is that all kids need to have a stable first 3 years with someone they bond with in a significant way. to me three years is a turning point for the person. at this juncture they can emotionally take care of themselves to a degree that allows others around them to change without harm. no drastic change of course but normal stuff, daycare can enter the picture, strangers, etc.

    men and women, homosexual couples, should take a child's feelings into account when arranging for parenting, bottom line. give them consistent grub and physiological means up till three, then be crazy. at least give them that! no kid needs to listen to the squabbles of their adultchildren.

    gaddam you are such a nagging hoare! you are never here, how could you feel my pain! and this house is a mess, what have you been doing all day, since you want to gripe at me i'll gripe at you, gowd this is no fun! i wanna buy this, you bought that?! you are so irresponsible! we have no money. but you work 23 6 why don't we have any gd money?! ask for a gd raise! you have no value that's what! you are a money mole that's what you are! well you aren't a homemaker at all, you can't even leave me alone when i come home from a long days work, which i'm sacrificing for all you guys, gdit! let's make up and have sex. i'm tired.

  5. #55
    にゃん runvardh's Avatar
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    I prefer someone at home till the child has formalized the rules in their head which physiologically happens around puberty. After that it's just reinforcement of rules so that those cells don't die.
    Dreams are best served manifest and tangible.

    INFP, 6w7, IEI

    I accept no responsibility, what so ever, for the fact that I exist; I do, however, accept full responsibility for what I do while I exist.

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  6. #56
    Senior Member Lateralus's Avatar
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    I would think that being a homemaker, in the traditional sense, would be pretty emasculating for a male. I don't buy the argument that society's views are irrelevant. That totally depends on the individual. Some people aren't hermits and actually interact with the rest of the world.
    "We grow up thinking that beliefs are something to be proud of, but they're really nothing but opinions one refuses to reconsider. Beliefs are easy. The stronger your beliefs are, the less open you are to growth and wisdom, because "strength of belief" is only the intensity with which you resist questioning yourself. As soon as you are proud of a belief, as soon as you think it adds something to who you are, then you've made it a part of your ego."

  7. #57
    Priestess Of Syrinx Katsuni's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lateralus View Post
    Some people aren't hermits and actually interact with the rest of the world.
    I demand proof! I've never met someone who wasn't a hermit!

    ...Possibly... because I'm a hermit...

    Minor technicality!

  8. #58
    Senior Member Lookin4theBestNU's Avatar
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    Over the last year or so my husbands company has taken some hard knocks. He has been home much more lately taking care of domestic duties and I'm totally loving it. I've NEVER been successful and certainly not satisfied in the stay-at-home mom role. I essentially had to do it for awhile because daycare was eating up almost all of the money I was bringing home. It was one of the most depressing periods of my life. I'm not sure I would be OK with him not working at all but a part-time stay-at-home husband is ideal for me. My job is really stressful and I'm now the primary source of income. I don't mind at all and almost any job is better than staying at home. He seems to really enjoy things like they are now. It is really great to have that support on the home front. He doesn't have the ego trip that some men I've seen have about being the breadwinner which is good for me. I've talked about it so highly that my best friend and her husband are considering him working just part-time too. My house isn't spotless nor can he cook well but life is going good with him home more. The gender roles are deeply ingrained in our minds since very early childhood so I do understand the people who have trouble with it. Once you get over that (which was actually easy in this case) it's a great option for some families including mine.
    "At points of clarity, I realize that my life on earth is meaningless, and that I am merely a pawn in a bigger game. A game I cannot possibly understand or have control of. Thankfully, before depression sets in, I drift back into my cloudy, bewildered daily routine." **Joel Patrick Warneke**

  9. #59
    ^He pronks, too! Magic Poriferan's Avatar
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    I have acknowledged that I am not and will never be conventionally masculine. As such, I'm not afraid of an "emasculating" role, and instead, I wish it were easier to find people that would just accept that I'm not going to be masculine.

    The idea of doing the domestic work sounds far more appealing to me than being employed, but I dropped any hopes that I was going to do that a while ago.
    Go to sleep, iguana.


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  10. #60
    Member mattness's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SubjectA View Post
    I see nothing wrong with a man choosing to stay home and take care of the kids while the wife holds the job. Whatever works for the family is best, and society shouldn't dictate or even imply what's the best situation for a family. A lot of guys think it isn't "manly" if they don't make most if not all the household income. Stay-at-home dads are really looked down upon by their peers in today's society, and it's wrong.

    So what do you think of the idea? Would you be a stay at home dad if you had the choice?
    my bro is a stay at home dad & hes great. its backward to think a guy can't. or shouldn't. i teach at home alot anyway so it wouldnt be a big deal for me to stay at home if my girl had a demanding career. i think guys just have a drive to provide for family that can be at home just as easy as having outside work. looking down on stay at home dads is just ignorant. raising kids is fucking hard work. my bro has three & he's permanently tired. manly to me just means taking care of business making sure your kids & girl are good

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