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Thread: Male Homemakers

  1. #21
    にゃん runvardh's Avatar
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    My only problem would come from needing money for hobies...
    Dreams are best served manifest and tangible.

    INFP, 6w7, IEI

    I accept no responsibility, what so ever, for the fact that I exist; I do, however, accept full responsibility for what I do while I exist.

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  2. #22
    Senior Member Feops's Avatar
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    I wonder if men in general are properly conditioned to handle that type of social atmosphere. I've a strong feeling that I would become isolated and irritated after not too long.

  3. #23
    On a mission Usehername's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ivy View Post
    Well, I basically agree with that- but I think most mothers want something else to do after a few years, too. Especially if they were very work-oriented before spawning. The difference, IMO, is that the societal expectations for women are different from those for men. IMO, they're even more strict for boys and men.
    Definitely. My opinion is purely a pragmatic one. I'd be cool with it temporarily (a few years max) but in the long term, I think even if paying the cost of daycare financially nullifies the point of having him work, the social rewards would probably make it worth it.
    *You don't have a soul. You are a Soul. You have a body.
    *Faith is the art of holding on to things your reason once accepted, despite your changing moods.
    C.S. Lewis

  4. #24
    Senior Member cafe's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by runvardh View Post
    My only problem would come from needing money for hobies...
    That's just part of the family budget, regardless of who is the breadwinner. Or should be, IMO.
    “There are two novels that can change a bookish fourteen-year old’s life: The Lord of the Rings and Atlas Shrugged. One is a childish fantasy that often engenders a lifelong obsession with its unbelievable heroes, leading to an emotionally stunted, socially crippled adulthood, unable to deal with the real world. The other, of course, involves orcs.”
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  5. #25
    にゃん runvardh's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by cafe View Post
    That's just part of the family budget, regardless of who is the breadwinner. Or should be, IMO.
    Ok, I guess I just have to make sure I really trust her; which makes that a moot point since I should be able to trust her before things get that far.
    Dreams are best served manifest and tangible.

    INFP, 6w7, IEI

    I accept no responsibility, what so ever, for the fact that I exist; I do, however, accept full responsibility for what I do while I exist.

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  6. #26
    ^He pronks, too! Magic Poriferan's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Feops View Post
    I wonder if men in general are properly conditioned to handle that type of social atmosphere. I've a strong feeling that I would become isolated and irritated after not too long.
    It sounds fine to me.
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  7. #27
    Strongly Ambivalent Ivy's Avatar
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    I don't think the question of whether men in general are properly conditioned to handle the social atmosphere is very relevant when it comes to any individual man. It's insulting when people insinuate that women aren't properly conditioned to work fulltime after having children, and I find it equally insulting to insinuate that men can't handle doing the bulk of household management and childrearing.
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  8. #28
    The Architect Alwar's Avatar
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    Yeah baby, you bring home that bacon. *Slaps wife's butt*

    2 year old daughter walks up after wife leaves for work...

    "Daddy I fall down and have boo boo"

    Me: "Be a man and walk it off" *sips pabst blue ribbon*

    Livin the dream.

  9. #29
    Sugar Hiccup OrangeAppled's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ivy View Post
    Well, I basically agree with that- but I think most mothers want something else to do after a few years, too. Especially if they were very work-oriented before spawning. The difference, IMO, is that the societal expectations for women are different from those for men. IMO, they're even more strict for boys and men.
    Definitely....my ISFJ mom was cool with staying home because her interests were gardening, cooking (elaborate stuff, not just dinner), reading, and volunteering. This was easy to work around taking care of kids. I think more women than not need to have additional "projects" beyond the home though.

    My aunt was going stir-crazy after having a kid and went back to work after a year. Now her husband works for himself out of the home, and he is essentially "Mr. Mom" since he has the flexible schedule and more time to clean/cook/care for their kid. He can also bring their child along when he works outside the home.

    I think the bottom line is a person needs some stimulation outside of parenting and homemaking.
    Often a star was waiting for you to notice it. A wave rolled toward you out of the distant past, or as you walked under an open window, a violin yielded itself to your hearing. All this was mission. But could you accomplish it? (Rilke)

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  10. #30
    Retired Member Wonkavision's Avatar
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    I was a stay-at-home-dad for 2 years.

    Though I loved spending so much time with my child, it was extremely debilitating to be financially dependent on my wife.

    I lost most of my self-esteem and self-confidence during that period, and there certainly was no shortage of people insulting and degrading me for doing it.

    My wife did not like being the primary homemaker, either.

    Right now, I work full-time and she works 3 days a week.

    Her mom babysits on the days she works.

    This arrangement is working out really well for us.
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