User Tag List

First 1234 Last

Results 11 to 20 of 62

Thread: Male Homemakers

  1. #11
    Senior Member avolkiteshvara's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    MBTI
    YaYa
    Posts
    895

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Kangirl View Post


    I know, right? Fuckin lazy women and their "just" kids/housework. Why won't they do some *hard* work??!

    Did you man give you permission to use the internet to post this?

  2. #12
    Intriguing.... Quinlan's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2008
    MBTI
    ISFP
    Enneagram
    9w1
    Socionics
    Booo
    Posts
    3,005

    Default

    In theory I'm all for it, could never picture myself doing it though.
    Act your age not your enneagram number.

    Quinlan's Creations

  3. #13

    Default

    I did it for six months when I first came to Japan. I looked after our daughter who was then two/three. I enjoyed it.

  4. #14
    Earth Exalted Thursday's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    MBTI
    ENTJ
    Enneagram
    8w9 sp/sx
    Socionics
    LIE
    Posts
    3,965

    Default

    I have been the feminine force in every relationship that i can think of.
    I see myself as in-charge in that respect.
    Not that this matters, but it is my area of expertise(music,art,emotion,mysticism,people)
    so it is natural that the woman and other half in my life would be the opposite and deal with in pragmatics
    These things work themselves out without my interference and I would make a great "stay @home dad"
    I N V I C T U S

  5. #15
    Strongly Ambivalent Ivy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    MBTI
    INFP
    Enneagram
    6
    Posts
    24,060

    Default

    I've known several families that have this setup and it works well for them. If that's how a particular family decides to divide the work of supporting and raising the children, more power to them.
    The one who buggers a fire burns his penis
    -anonymous graffiti in the basilica at Pompeii

  6. #16
    Strongly Ambivalent Ivy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    MBTI
    INFP
    Enneagram
    6
    Posts
    24,060

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Usehername View Post
    It just tends not to work. If you follow the blogs of SAHDads they either end up divorced or going back to work after a few years. I'm sure it could work out in theory, but it tends to not pan out in reality when it's for-realz long term.
    I don't think going back to work after a few years means it didn't work. Plenty of mothers go back to work after a few years, after having enjoyed being home with their children when they were very small.

    Divorce, that's not good, but I don't think I buy that it's a higher risk for couples where the dad stays home with the kids.
    The one who buggers a fire burns his penis
    -anonymous graffiti in the basilica at Pompeii

  7. #17
    On a mission Usehername's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2007
    MBTI
    INTJ
    Enneagram
    1
    Posts
    3,823

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Qre:us View Post
    What is the purpose of this link?
    Quote Originally Posted by cafe View Post
    I don't know how it works out in practice but in theory, I am for having a loving, competent relative or quasi-relative taking care of children whenever possible. Mom, dad, grandma, etc all fine as long as it works and all parties are reasonably happy with the arrangement.

    Word to dads considering it: It's harder than it looks. Something about the job makes it a real morale sink. Since more women than men do it, it's easier for women to plug into a support network. Hopefully dads will have that someday, too.
    Quote Originally Posted by SubjectA View Post
    As opposed to how many couples where the mom is the stay at home parent or both parents are working? Marriage in general tends not to work if you look at the US population.

    In the US, there are over 100,000 families that are making it work. In fact, it has become a norm in some other countries.
    Quote Originally Posted by Ivy View Post
    I don't think going back to work after a few years means it didn't work. Plenty of mothers go back to work after a few years, after having enjoyed being home with their children when they were very small.

    Divorce, that's not good, but I don't think I buy that it's a higher risk for couples where the dad stays home with the kids.
    I should not have posted in a rush.

    Context: My dad was a SAHD with me for a few years and though I was too young to know the details, from what I understand it worked out beautifully given their career situations and me being an accident that messed with their plan.

    I was Googling/looking for commentary on SAHDs while I was considering whether or not to go for a PhD; this is where I found the link that I posted. The link was mostly to note her questions at the end (should have specified). The one that drew me most was
    Is being a stay-at-home dad any different than the life that Betty Friedan and Sylvia Plath worked so hard to get away from?
    I just read Plath's The Bell Jar earlier this year (about her serious depression, as well as her hate for the expectation to be The Good Wife/playing on greek/Jungian themes. From reading all sorts of Jewish/Christian/secular/male/female blogs, my understanding is that (in general, never always) it works really well if it's seen as a transitory thing for a few years (and from my understanding that was the case with my parents when I was young) but if it's a serious, long term thing the men (generally!) simply cannot connect successfully with SAHMs because they are different, and they cannot connect with working at the office kinds of dads, and they feel very isolated. (A la Plath's book.)

    I'm all for it, I just think that if it's a loong term thing, it is just incredibly unlikely to work out. (From my earlier research. I'm single and don't really have a career yet, so I don't think I researched that heavily, just enough to satiate the typical INxJ needing information to make an informed decision. Because I'm not going to be a SAHM.) The men cannot connect socially because they don't fit in anywhere, and after several years, they lose themselves which isn't good for anyone.
    *You don't have a soul. You are a Soul. You have a body.
    *Faith is the art of holding on to things your reason once accepted, despite your changing moods.
    C.S. Lewis

  8. #18
    Strongly Ambivalent Ivy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    MBTI
    INFP
    Enneagram
    6
    Posts
    24,060

    Default

    Well, I basically agree with that- but I think most mothers want something else to do after a few years, too. Especially if they were very work-oriented before spawning. The difference, IMO, is that the societal expectations for women are different from those for men. IMO, they're even more strict for boys and men.
    The one who buggers a fire burns his penis
    -anonymous graffiti in the basilica at Pompeii

  9. #19
    ^He pronks, too! Magic Poriferan's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    MBTI
    Yin
    Enneagram
    One sx/sp
    Posts
    13,905

    Default

    I've thought about this, because I hate working out in society, and dislike the whole concept of employment.
    Go to sleep, iguana.


    _________________________________
    INTP. Type 1>6>5. sx/sp.
    Live and let live will just amount to might makes right

  10. #20
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Enneagram
    9w1 sx/so
    Posts
    18,086

    Default

    totally think whoever is happiest staying home should.
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

Similar Threads

  1. What would an INTJ male find physically attractive?
    By Usehername in forum Myers-Briggs and Jungian Cognitive Functions
    Replies: 102
    Last Post: 07-11-2015, 10:04 PM
  2. Rarest male type?
    By Economica in forum Myers-Briggs and Jungian Cognitive Functions
    Replies: 65
    Last Post: 08-18-2007, 01:25 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO