I looked into this a while back for myself, as I don't like milk.
Overall, there is no concern unless you have excess oestrogen, and even then it is likely to be more beneficial than harmful.
In general, soy is better.
There are two reasons this comes up - the first is the dairy lobby, which caused quite the uproar... combine that with the hippy association/vegetarian connection, you get quite the backlash for saying you drink soy in certain areas.
The second is that there are notable cases of animals changing to a soy diet and having it influence reproduction and so forth. However, it is also noted that the two common concerns - birds and rats - don't metabolize soy the same way humans do.
Humans are already doing large scale testing on soy products and nothing of note has been found. The absolute most that can be said is that a small segment of the population might be better off not consuming it, while the majority would do better.
I like vitasoy. And various locally-made soy milk brands they sell in asian markets (some delis/lunch places make it themselves too). When I was a kid, I loved Yeo, but it's sort of a thick, dessert-y soy- not for every day use, I'm afraid.
My grandmother loves buying tons of Silk at Costco too- and maybe I'm just imagining it but it always tastes like vanilla to me (like yellow vanilla ice cream)- which is unpleasant to me in a soy milk. I'm possibly projecting this unpleasantness as I once had carton-tasting Silk at a coffee place.
Funny story, once I think I cross-contaminated soy milk and yogurt and the soy milk turned into a tofu-yogurt hybrid over a few days before I figured something was different.
I've had trouble with female pain etc all my life, and soy is a good way to interrupt your body's manufacture of "bad" estrogen by uptaking the good estrogen in soy Eat/drink it in good health, Bella! It's not at all a bad thing.
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I hope it doesn't do anything to men's systems. Even a tiny bit of estrogenic endocrine disruptor can cause some severe problems in guys. Me and the GF drink Silk soymilk at home all the time. I don't even buy regular milk anymore.
I used to work with estrogen, too. Let me tell you, it's nerve-wracking for a guy when you're weighing out a few milligrams of 99.9% pure estrogen, to make a 1:2000 dilution. The stuff is really fluffy, and the slightest breath will blow it all over the place. I did NOT want that stuff anywhere near my mouth or skin.