I'm considering in investing in cosmetic surgery...

[mmhmm]

Getting fit will make more difference than plastic surgery.

oh yeah. agree. i was watching a reality tv show,
and some of the chicks had incredible bodies.
but they all had raisin faces.

so close up shots especially with the hair pulled back
were like, ew 26 year old leather face. but when it's
a total body shot, they looked good. let down the
hair.

 

[Lady_X]

I think you need to watch all the seasons of Queer Eye for the Straight guy. <--- I know this sounds inflammatory, but I half mean it.

hey! didn't realize we both said this! haha i think it's good advice. some people just really don't have the eye for it.

and uber really people don't need perfection in facial symmetry...there are a lot of people who were not born with devastating good looks but look amazing based on their personality and style....that's really all that matters.

 

[Qlip]

hey! didn't realize we both said this! haha i think it's good advice. some people just really don't have the eye for it.

and uber really people don't need perfection in facial symmetry...there are a lot of people who were not born with devastating good looks but look amazing based on their personality and style....that's really all that matters.

I didn't know you worked in a salon.

OP: Concerning my comment on watching some style TV shows and the like, even if you don't see any benefit in changing your style and haircut because you may be particularly oblivious to that sort of thing, you will definitely see how other's react to visual transformations.

Anyway, I'm along with the others with the opinion that your cultivated repelling image, insecurity and prejudices are really what's keeping you from getting whatever you are trying to achieve here. I mean, you panned that last chick who messaged you because she was a Jew?! Any whiff of that sort of world view will kind of scare away about 90% of the dating pool.

 

[Lady_X]

I didn't know you worked in a salon.

OP: Concerning my comment on watching some style TV shows and the like, even if you don't see any benefit in changing your style and haircut because you may be particularly oblivious to that sort of thing, you will definitely see how other's react to visual transformations.

Anyway, I'm along with the others with the opinion that your cultivated repelling image, insecurity and prejudices are really what's keeping you from getting whatever you are trying to achieve here. I mean, you panned that last chick who messaged you because she was a Jew?! Any whiff of that sort of world view will kind of scare away about 90% of the dating pool.

haha i don't anymore...but did for years.

and yeah totally...learn to accept others and yourself...and you will be more approachable. sounds like you have unrealistic expectations on everyone...including yourself....you seek perfection in others and yourself...and...it's just not reality. people are flawed...people have imperfect features....but it adds character and dimension and the really attractive thing is when it doesn't matter...when it's not even noticed.

there are so many celebrities that were not born attractive but have developed such interesting characters and ways of being that it's all you notice..you are drawn in by that personality oozing out...that sex appeal that comes from within.

sort that out...in your brain and you'll be alright.

 

[The Outsider]

You look good; just get more sun and work out and use some product on your hair.

Or, if all else fails... become Zyzz.

 

[The Ü™]

I didn't know you worked in a salon.

OP: Concerning my comment on watching some style TV shows and the like, even if you don't see any benefit in changing your style and haircut because you may be particularly oblivious to that sort of thing, you will definitely see how other's react to visual transformations.

Anyway, I'm along with the others with the opinion that your cultivated repelling image, insecurity and prejudices are really what's keeping you from getting whatever you are trying to achieve here. I mean, you panned that last chick who messaged you because she was a Jew?! Any whiff of that sort of world view will kind of scare away about 90% of the dating pool.

If you view those posts again, I didn't pan her because she was a Jew, I panned her because of her limited vocabulary. I mean, it's kinda stupid to just say "Hi!" and "How are you?" in written format, don't you think?

And 90 percent of the dating pool isn't Jewish, statistically speaking.

You look good; just get more sun and work out and use some product on your hair.

You've only seen my face (and fat is the one thing I don't consider it), how do you know if I work out or not?

And as for product, basically you're saying that I should make my hair look like plastic?

 

[The Outsider]

You've only seen my face (and fat is the one thing I don't consider it), how do you know if I work out or not?

I don't even know why I assumed that, sorry if I was mistaken.

 

[Laurie]

This thread explains why nice looking stars (and non stars) destroy their faces. I've never seen it written out so clearly.

DO IT, UBER. DON'T LISTEN TO THE SENSIBLE PEOPLE. LISTEN TO YOURSELF!

Pretty much where I stand. Including the sarcasm, not the face value comment, of course.

 

[Randomnity]

And 90 percent of the dating pool isn't Jewish, statistically speaking.

This may surprise you, but you don't have to be a minority to despise racism.

 

[The Ü™]

Well, here are some photos I've taken that I think are clear enough. For privacy reasons (since I believe that guests can access this thread), I have posted the photos in The Ãœniverse.

 

[Laurie]

I looked at your photos. What kind of women are you trying to attract? The death stare reminds me of a MySpace type picture. You look fine. Your style of picture would have been off putting to me back when I was looking for someone.

 

[The Ü™]

I looked at your photos. What kind of women are you trying to attract? The death stare reminds me of a MySpace type picture. You look fine. Your style of picture would have been off putting to me back when I was looking for someone.

Wait, i look fine, but the style of picture is off putting? This is sorta contradictory.

Maybe my problem is in the eyes. Maybe they're too dark? Too large?

 

[Tigerlily]

Come on! He doesn't really want to have plastic surgery, he's just fishing for compliments! Thankfully he's not as bad as another INTJ that used to post here was. He was just pitiful the way he always went on and on about being an ugly loser and everyone kept telling him, "you look great" and pumping up his ego. *yawn*

Edit: I'm with Usehername. Get a better haircut. As for coming off as creepy and someone people should avoid, there's not much you can do about that, but they say there's someone for everyone so at least there's that.

 

[Fidelia]

Wait, i look fine, but the style of picture is off putting? This is sorta contradictory.

Maybe my problem is in the eyes. Maybe they're too dark? Too large?

No, it's more the "I'm going to take you back to my place and murder you in cold blood" look that is a little unsettling. I think as much as you can, also try to avoid pictures taken in dark environments with lighting coming from below the face. Makes you look scary. Dark eyes are nice. So are large eyes.

I don't think I've ever seen you smile for a picture. Is there any particular reason for that? I don't mean a glued on fake smile, but something that involves relaxing your eyes and facial muscles a little into something that invites the viewer to approach you. Are you especially attached to that particular look? Do you dislike your teeth? Did you have Botox that froze your face into a tense position? Are you looking for someone who's into that murderer look? Give us something to work with here!

 

[The Ü™]

I wonder if it's possible for my eyes to be larger or at least look larger?

As for the dark lighting pictures, I take those so that attention is drawn to the subject and not the background. And because I look cooler in those photos.

What is this serial killer look that you speak of? I figured it was a look that I did on purpose, but now I'm finding that maybe I naturally look this way. Maybe I can pinpoint the parts that I need to change.

 

[OrangeAppled]

Don't do surgery. You don't "need" it (almost no one does, IMO). I echo getting new clothes & a better haircut. Your personality will work better with something sleeker, tailored, a tad dark & artistic, IMO. Then you can be mysterious, cool INTJ & not creepy INTJ.

Also, start working out (if you don't already). It will make you FEEL better about yourself, which is more significant than any actual changes to your body, IMO.

 

[The Ü™]

I hear getting tailored clothing is expensive. And typically, I wear black; can't get much darker than that.

 

[Fidelia]

Go for normal lighting. Anytime you think something makes you look cooler, avoid it!!!!!
Look like you don't hate the world.
Allow the muscles around you eyes to squinch up a bit as if you are happy, or at least relaxed.
Smile.

Uber, unless you are autistic, I really can't imagine that these kinds of tips can be ones that's aren't pretty obvious. You really seem to be trying hard to make this all about something that you can't change about yourself. I would venture to say that 99% of what concerns you is purely internally driven. As you become more happy, relaxed and open towards people, your looks will also reflect that.

I believe the suggestions about working out are not because you look out of shape, but rather because when you feel like you look your best, and when you feel healthy as well, you carry yourself differently and relate to people in a different way. Exercise is a huge destressor and it also gives you confidence and a sense of accomplishment when you challenge yourself and see progress happening.

Tailored doesn't have to mean altered to fit you perfectly, but rather that you should choose something that follows the shape of your body a bit rather than being baggy or tight. Generally that is the most flattering for everyone.

 

[DiscoBiscuit]

If you are content and resilient yourself, the world is going to look like a decent place and you can find happiness, even when your circumstances are difficult. If you aren't content or resilient, you will also find yourself mistrustful of people at the same time as wanting acceptance from them. At the same time, you will continue doing exactly what is not working for you.

You will only want people in your life if you can remain in control of the interaction, and most people just don't respond well to that. It is difficult to be happy for anyone's success, because everything is a competition. When you start getting closer to someone, you do something to sabotage it.

You need to be able to care for other people's needs as well as allowing yours to be taken care of. That requires taking the risk of being vulnerable and building trust. It is not instant, and it does make it possible for you to get hurt, but if you don't start working on it now, it will delay your happiness that many years longer.

Fuck... you might as well have been talking about me.

I've been wanting to talk about this, but the time and effort it takes me to articulate my thoughts when they concern my emotions is prohibitively large.

I need to figure out how to get close to people again.

 

[The Ü™]

You do not want to see my smile. Trust me. And my eyes are in their normal, relaxed position in those photos. But I'll try different experiments and post them.