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  1. #81
    The Black Knight Domino's Avatar
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    When you transition from your 20s to 30s, there's something of a freak-out that can occur. I freaked around 27, then got over it. THANK GOODNESS. Once I hit 30, I determined, on a cellular level, that I would punch the daylights out of anyone judging my appearance and I felt calm. I recently went to a club and someone guessed my age as 21. Some lady in a grocery store asked if I was 23 or 24. I chalk this up to taking care of myself, encouraging good genetics, and refusing to act old.

    Smack anyone who bitchs about getting old just so you can suffer with them. Yes, getting older is hard in many ways, but don't let anyone take you hostage.
    eNFJ 4w3 sx/so 468 tritype
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  2. #82
    Emerging Tallulah's Avatar
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    I feel like I look a bit older this year, despite doing everything I could to take care of myself all my life. At a certain point, you lose some of the fat in your face, which makes stuff shift around or hollow out. But yeah, there are still facial exercises you can do, and most people aren't looking at you with as much scrutiny as you would yourself. I still get the same reactions that I did before I started looking older to myself. But it still sucks because I know what's different. I'd say, try not to look in the mirror expecting to see a 20 year old.

    I tend to think women who are in their 40s and 50s who've taken care of themselves are quite beautiful, so I'm less scared of what lies ahead. It's just hard to see yourself through the same lens.
    Something Witty

  3. #83
    The Black Knight Domino's Avatar
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    I've seen you, Tallulah. You're stunning. I want to age as well as you have/are.

    Then again, I may, because we cuzzinz!
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  4. #84
    Emerging Tallulah's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Domino View Post
    I've seen you, Tallulah. You're stunning. I want to age as well as you have/are.

    Then again, I may, because we cuzzinz!
    Merci, dear cousin! You will always be stunning!
    Something Witty

  5. #85
    nee andante bechimo's Avatar
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    *pouts*

    I wanna see Tallulah!

  6. #86
    The Black Knight Domino's Avatar
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    You should, Jen. She's a peach.
    eNFJ 4w3 sx/so 468 tritype
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  7. #87
    ThatGirl
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    Lol @ this thread. First of all, I just hit 30. Though if anyone asks for the next 30 years, I will be 25.

    My 20s, were horrible. One thing after another. While things are finally starting to look up, I feel like I handled the past stress well, never let it show (physically). In the last 6 months, my looks have declined at a massively accelerated rate. I went from looking 20 to 35 in six months. In the last six months, I gained weight to 170 lbs. My hair has a huge patch of grey growing in right in the front. My skin elasticity is worn from fluctuations in weight, and if I turn my head to the side I get all these wrinkles down my neck. Everything is starting to sag, and jiggle.

    I know I feel ugly because the thought of feeling sexy right now is absolutely absurd to me. Instead I just have to have a cheerful disposition to be charming, and to me, that is exactly how women get old! Once they really start loosing their looks.

    My mental maturity, has not caught up to my physical aging. I know everyone is beautiful. I see beauty in everyone. I know that right now I look ten times younger than I will in the future, so I should enjoy it. I know Looks are such a superficial thing, one should not even consider it in the first place. I know all this. But I am not ready.

    I may not look awful, but I don't look like me. Gingko was correct in saying I should heed my own signature, but my mind hasn't caught up with my physical limitation.

  8. #88
    The Black Knight Domino's Avatar
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    Give yourself some time to get calm, truly calm, before trying to do anything about your concerns. And know that you aren't alone (in this sucky club!)
    eNFJ 4w3 sx/so 468 tritype
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  9. #89
    Senior Member Gish's Avatar
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    Yeah, definitely take some time to chill out before you make a decision, sometimes the desire for something can make you forgo thinking about the effects of making that decision. Which is why I always masturbate before making important relationship decisions.
    Whoops.

  10. #90
    RETIRED CzeCze's Avatar
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    Ah, so you're talking about the jarring when you see yourself in the mirror now compared to your mental image. I think most people look at themselves and go on autopilot, the way you drive familiar routes without even thinking. Once you get over the shock of looking different from how you see yourself, you can adjust your self-image or tell yourself you are whoever at whatever age you prefer.

    As far as ageing, it's like with all the other stuff in life, you're only competing against yourself and your genes.

    As far as comparing with the rest of the population, what I always say is that beauty is a marathon, not a race. People age poorly because they either did not have the opportunities or the desire to take care of themselves when they thought they looked fine. Lots of stuff catches up to you years and years after the fact. And ounce of prevention = a pound of cure and all that.

    That's what I tell myself when others stare at me for wearing large floppy hats, huge sunglasses, that thick SPF that makes you slightly oily and pasty and gloves when it's sunny out. Laugh at me now mofos! We'll see who's laughing when we're 60.

    ^^ That was totally on topic.

    So don't worry TG. Every day is a new chance to drink lots of water, not smoke, etc. and take care of ourselves.
    “If you want to tell people the truth, make them laugh, otherwise they'll kill you.” ― Oscar Wilde

    "I'm outtie 5000" ― Romulux

    Johari/Nohari

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