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Psychosis and... Me?

prplchknz

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 11, 2007
Messages
34,397
MBTI Type
yupp
even if you don't think you have a mental illness and no one on here can dictate one or the other it wouldn't hurt to talk to someone, because something has to change. and it seems to me you aren't going to change it on your own, they can help you develop skills, maybe changing your major it took me 3 tries to find the major I like.
 

Oeufa

New member
Joined
Jan 5, 2010
Messages
694
MBTI Type
INTP
I've already said I can't change course (which I would need to do to change my major), as that would involve paying full fees which I cannot afford. It's not an option for me.
 

Oeufa

New member
Joined
Jan 5, 2010
Messages
694
MBTI Type
INTP
Hmmm, still no word from the counseling service as to when I might expect an appointment :(. I'm wondering if maybe I should bite the bullet and go to my GP instead. He is expensive though, and all he would be able to do is refer me to St Patrick's hospital mental health service if he felt it was necessary (which I'm not convinced it is, as that would involve hospitalisation and other fun things, but whatever). I cannot directly book an appointment with a psychiatrist after all :(

How do I know if I need to get help, and where to I go to get it if I do? :laugh:
 

Red Herring

Superwoman
Joined
Jun 9, 2010
Messages
7,488
MBTI Type
INTP
Enneagram
5w4
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
You find out by asking an expert. Simple as that. The GP can help rule out physical causes and recommend further steps.
 

Oeufa

New member
Joined
Jan 5, 2010
Messages
694
MBTI Type
INTP
Lol just took a test on mymoodmonitor that says there's a 90% chance I'm depressed and a 1in3 chance I'm bipolar. Happy happy fun times :laugh:

edit: @Within yeah, sorry about that :(
 

Oeufa

New member
Joined
Jan 5, 2010
Messages
694
MBTI Type
INTP
Nah, it's ok. I know I'm going in circles here. It's actually really really fucking annoying :laugh:. If I were someone else reading this thread I'd have lost patience aaaaaaaaaaaaaages ago.
 
G

Ginkgo

Guest
Nah, it's ok. I know I'm going in circles here. It's actually really really fucking annoying :laugh:. If I were someone else reading this thread I'd have lost patience aaaaaaaaaaaaaages ago.

Don't worry. This haze will dismiss itself eventually. :)
 

Synapse

New member
Joined
Dec 29, 2007
Messages
3,359
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
4
Like Choice Theory I suppose.

[youtube="eYJBBm7bilA"]Choice Theory[/youtube]
 

Oeufa

New member
Joined
Jan 5, 2010
Messages
694
MBTI Type
INTP
^ Looks interesting alright.


Still no word from the counseling service..... What a shambles of a university I go to. :shrug:


Anyway, I came on here to tell ye that something happened yesterday... I was lying in bed reading when my train of thought started going along the lines of, "Well if I don't want kids and I don't want marriage, then what am I here for? Am I gonna wind up a little old lady living all alone with absolutely nobody alive left I know?" and it got progressively more dangerous from there until I kinda snapped out of it. When I was thinking that way my mind felt kinda warm and fuzzy, like everything was tainted in a pinkish glow. When I realised the dark place I was going my mind became clear and normal again, but I'm scared now. Really scared. What if I hadn't snapped out of it? What if I kept thinking that way? I just whispered "I want to live" over and over until I finally fell asleep. I was afraid before that I might crack, but this was nothing like a crack. It was a fall down a slope, and if I hadn't snagged on a tree I would have kept slipping. I wasn't prepared for how that would feel.


I'm trying to fill my head with positive thoughts, but I'm terrified now. What if I don't regain control next time?? I don't want to die young. I'm not ready. I can't even begin to comprehend utter oblivion, and I fully intend to put off that moment as long as I can. But this? My mind betrayed me. It planted thoughts I don't remember thinking, but it felt like I'd thought them a 1000 times before. It was all too natural. It was too easy. I got lucky this time.

In other news, I've an exam in about 9 hours that I still haven't studied for. Hmmmm....
 
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