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  1. #11
    On a mission Usehername's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Metamorphosis View Post
    I can see the attraction of it for an INTJ (a female at least).
    Yes. It's the equivalent to your obsessive working out, but just to a warped degree where it's zero intellectualization and all control.
    *You don't have a soul. You are a Soul. You have a body.
    *Faith is the art of holding on to things your reason once accepted, despite your changing moods.
    C.S. Lewis

  2. #12
    Per Ardua Metamorphosis's Avatar
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    Interesting perspective...and probably true.
    "You will always be fond of me. I represent to you all the sins you never had the courage to commit."

    Reason is, and ought only to be the slave of the passions, and can never pretend to any other office
    than to serve and obey them. - David Hume

  3. #13
    Senior Member prplchknz's Avatar
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    So I didn't actually go to the gym with her. She said that he wasn't going to be their until 5:30 and she had class at 6. So I don't know if she's gone and talked to the teacher or not. Not too mentioned she was shocked when I said I wanted to go to the gym. I then explained that the one person who was going to go with her had an interview, so couldn't go and I was taking her place. I also have no clue what I would have said so maybe that was a good thing. It's still hard for me to understand her motivation when she knows their are healthier ways to lose weight, maybe it is for control. She doesn't need to lose weight if anything she needs to gain. My one friend who is (was) bulemic(and I did nothing, now has a tube in her stomach from gaestroparisis hell I may have encouraged it) said that my room mate knows. That people with eating disorders usually know, but don't admit.

  4. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by prplchknz View Post
    So I didn't actually go to the gym with her. She said that he wasn't going to be their until 5:30 and she had class at 6. So I don't know if she's gone and talked to the teacher or not. Not too mentioned she was shocked when I said I wanted to go to the gym. I then explained that the one person who was going to go with her had an interview, so couldn't go and I was taking her place. I also have no clue what I would have said so maybe that was a good thing. It's still hard for me to understand her motivation when she knows their are healthier ways to lose weight, maybe it is for control. She doesn't need to lose weight if anything she needs to gain. My one friend who is (was) bulemic(and I did nothing, now has a tube in her stomach from gaestroparisis hell I may have encouraged it) said that my room mate knows. That people with eating disorders usually know, but don't admit.
    It normally is to control something when everything is out of control. Since you said she is the INFJ (and I read that someone else had an INTJ friend with an eating disorder), think of what you've read about INFJ & INTJ perfectionism (and to an extent - control issues). Now think of that same perfectionism on turbo speed. That's really what keeps driving it. The losing weight is really just an after effect that has nothing much to do with it. People manifest their perfectionism problems in different ways - the straight A student who CANNOT get a B and MUST get into an Ivy League College, the girl who gets multiple plastic surgeries to have the perfect body, etc. None of it is healthy & the action is normally driven by something much deeper - a fear of failure or loss of control, most likely.

  5. #15
    Junior Member heykitten's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Usehername View Post
    THe thing about eating disorders is that they are not logical. Not in the slightest. So you can tell them facts, you can lay out bread crumbs of consequences for their actions...
    hell, my friend who was(is?) anorexic is an INTJ! And still, the only thing that helped her was spending her summer in the hospital with professional help because of her eating disorder. Doesn't that suck.

    none of it will help them. They need serious help from professionals.
    See, that's the thing, it is very, very, logical if you are eating disordered. Point A (calorie cutting etc) gets you to be Point B (weightloss etc) & the world is linear again, because most likely their world is otherwise in chaos. Physical effects does not deter the drive to get to Point B. Which seems warped in the mind of outsiders (understandably). It's hard to describe exactly because there are so many variables and reasons for one person, let alone the collective reasons for the eating disordered. It's upsets me when people simplify the reasons e.g. the media to the 'enlighten' the masses based on superficial rational of 'why'. There is no simplistic reason why.

    I'm not sure if it has shed light on EDs or not/the illogical of it all.

  6. #16
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    I've never been diagnosed with an eating disorder, but I understand the attraction of it.

    I'm not overweight, but I've found myself excessively counting calories and feeling sick at the thought of eating any fat. When things get really stressful, I sometimes skip meals and find a strange confort in ignoring my hunger. For me, it makes me feel strong--stronger than any physical problems: compensating for feeling very weak and out of control in other areas. It also feels a bit like I'm getting rid of excess nonsense that would "weigh me down". I know that doesn't make sense, I'm just trying to explain what it feels like. I also tend to lose my appetite under stress, and the thought of food feels yucky at times.

    When I realize I'm doing this, I try to turn the whole thing on its head. I tell myself that I am strong enough to choose to eat. I remind myself that I am in charge of my body and responsible for keeping it fit, so I will take care of this problem by giving my body materials necessary for it to build health. I make it a point to recognize the source of the stress and speak firmly to myself for 'giving in' to the tendency to misplace the desire for control.

    Explaining to her how she's damaging her body probably won't help her deep down inside. Inside, there are more important issues than just being healthy. She probably needs professional help. There are sites online for eating disorders. A friend of mine who used to be bulimic recommends the site somethingfishy.org

  7. #17
    Senior Member prplchknz's Avatar
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    Well good news she went to go see someone about her eating disorder today. She made the appointment and I went with her she tried to chicken out when we were at the door but I grabbed her and dragged her inside. She made me get up early (ok I don't sleep, but I had to get dressed) to go with her,
    In no likes experiment.

    that is all

    i dunno what else to say so

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