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Thread: names

  1. #11
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    I was never attached to my name before, because for reasons you can imagine, I didn't feel that that name described who I was. I actually hated it and always wanted to change it but couldn't think of anything I could change it *to*, except male names which weren't allowed for me then lol

    I went through a period of my transition where I was obliged by health system rules () to live full time in the male gender role, but yet I didn't look convincingly male yet, the hormones hadn't had time to kick in properly. So I went under a gender neutral name, intending to 'upgrade' it later, to avoid being arrested for fraud every time I used my credit card

    When I reached a point where I could upgrade the name, I did hate being called the shortened, gender neutral version of it for a long time. It kinda felt like y'know, I'd sweated blood and tears for the right to have this MALE name, don't you fucking gender neutral me now!!! :steam:

    But now I'm more laid back about it and don't really care what people call me. Even if it's disrespectful, I'm confident I can reciprocate more wittily
    Ils se d�merdent, les mecs: trop bon, trop con..................................MY BLOG!

    "When it all comes down to dust
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    I will help you if I can" - Leonard Cohen

  2. #12
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    Same as OP, I could care less what people call me, it holds no value, in fact I tend to give out random names whenever strangers speak to me if I'm in a group just for the fun of seeing the next person decide if they are gonna follow in suit or stutter. I rarely correct people if they get my name wrong.

  3. #13
    Minister of Propagandhi ajblaise's Avatar
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    One way I think names separate us from different cultures is that they all give out radically different sounding audible symbols for names. I remember a really small kid from South Korea came to my high school, he had a messed up name that no one could pronounce which alienated him even more. I renamed him "G Fresh" and by having a cool name, he almost became cool. Everyone would say hi to him, teachers even called him G Fresh.

    I think we should easily be able to change our legal names, even encouraged.

  4. #14
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    In the UK it is easy to change your name officially, it can be done for the equivalent of $10 in one day. In fact, there's a law here that says you're allowed to use any name you please as long as it's not for fraudulent purposes.

    For some people, I guess they relate strongly to their name, it means something to them, so it'd irritate them or upset them to have it incorrectly used or whatever. I suppose like you're calling them something they're not. But for others who feel their name doesn't accurately represent who they are (such as those with gender identity issues or who were say, given crazy names by hippie parents whose way of life the kid disagrees with etc), I guess being called by your 'real' name is worse than being called Butthead ...lol I know I used to say to people quite sincerely that I didn't care if they called me shit-head or whatever they liked as long as it wasn't THAT name my parents gave me.

    Since a person's name is so closely identified with the person themselves, I agree that people should have the right to choose for themselves how they're labelled. It always irritates me when I hear my friend saying of another friend "You know, JAMES" with audible quote marks around the name, as if to say he sees it as not valid because it wasn't the name registered on his birth certificate. I find that mentality very bizarre... I don't know how it can really stand up logically, the idea that something having been merely written on a piece of paper when a person was too young to have a say in the matter becomes the only official or valid label for them for the rest of their lives... like the individual's personal authority over who they are is completely irrelevant
    Ils se d�merdent, les mecs: trop bon, trop con..................................MY BLOG!

    "When it all comes down to dust
    I will kill you if I must
    I will help you if I can" - Leonard Cohen

  5. #15
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    If you find yourself at the library or bookstore, find a book with Asimov's short story "Spell my name with an 's'."

  6. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by prplchknz View Post
    So I noticed alot of people get upset when their name is mispronounced. Why? I mean what makes people so upset if they're called by the wrong thing? I've never been bothered if someone calls me not my name, as long as I know they're talking to me. Afterall too me it's just a name, one semester I had a professor that kept forgetting my name, I almost went "What name do I look like? I'll go by that" because to me I'm not attached to the name I've been given. So why do people put so much stress in names, it's just a title you were given at birth.

    I'm really curious. It just seems like a stupid thing to get upset over.
    According to Dale Carnegie, in How To Win Friends and Influence People,
    an excellent book, by the way, for learning to get along better with people,
    "...a person's name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language."

    The highlight points of the book are here:
    How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie


  7. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by INTJMom View Post
    According to Dale Carnegie, in How To Win Friends and Influence People,
    an excellent book, by the way, for learning to get along better with people,
    "...a person's name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language."

    The highlight points of the book are here:
    How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie

    Not having read the book, I'm guessing this is behind the general schmoozing advice of using people's names when you're talking to them. Like "Look, Bob, the thing is, Bob, you know this thing here..." and "I don't really wanna do that, Bob" and that sort of thing?

    Seems to work on people of average/low intelligence, who seem to buy it as a sign of sincerity. I've found that with smarter people though it tends to just be annoying. I know I find it irritating and my estimation of the person's sincerity goes down with each use of my name in that way.
    Ils se d�merdent, les mecs: trop bon, trop con..................................MY BLOG!

    "When it all comes down to dust
    I will kill you if I must
    I will help you if I can" - Leonard Cohen

  8. #18
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    I've read that, and it is advice for exactly "Influencing People," and somewhat effective if done properly (not overdone).

    The book is sociologically significant, and should be read by everyone if only to know how a lot of P.R. ideas were spread.

  9. #19
    Senior Member Ilah's Avatar
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    Becuase I have an unusual first name it is often mispronounce or mispelled. It happens so much I have kind of gotten used to it. It doesn't really bother me.

    What I find really annoy it that there is a person where I work whose name is a little bit like mine, and people keep calling me her name. Her name is Ida, which is like Ilah, but not a mispronounciating because there is no d in my name.

    Ilah

  10. #20
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    Ida know, they are kinha similar.

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