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Thread: Bullying

  1. #351

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    I'm surprised I was actually never harassed in this way, except by one a roommate I had that was impossible to live with. She was unbearably controlling, irritable, and judgmental. She would overreact to petty things that had no direct effect on her, like the fact that it bothered her to have to look at my disheveled bed. Then she would go on about what negative things it said about my "character". She would get annoyed if I apologized for bumping into her or if I held the door for her, but when I didn't, I still got yelled at! Sometimes she would even vent to me and I would offer her advice, only to be told that what I have to say is worthless because I'm younger than her. At first I tried to be accommodating and explain that I only wanted to have a harmonious relationship and never intended to offend her, but then she started inappropriately saying flat-out disrespectful things to me and becoming more and more obnoxious, until I started defending my actions and telling her to get over it and to mind her own business because truthfully, her opinions are of no interest to me, I just want to relax. I'm more than willing to compromise and practice common courtesy, but she has to have some tolerance herself and realize that her preferences do not naturally take precedence over my own. She backed off some because she knew I was fed up and would bite back, but I still sucked up to her just so I wouldn't have to deal with her. I think one trick is to make the other person think you see them as a joke and don't give a shit about them, without seeming desperate/like you have something to prove. Have some pride.

  2. #352

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    Witnessed a lesbian.

  3. #353
    noʎ ɟo ǝʇnɔ ʍoH Mademoiselle's Avatar
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    The solution is simple.
    Knowledge:
    People learn it is ridiculouse.
    People learn a person who is bullied doesn't lose any value the person even earns respect.
    And the dump who bullies people is empty.
    Last edited by Mademoiselle; 07-14-2015 at 05:15 PM. Reason: Bad connection, yeah
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  4. #354
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    My sisters friends and their family members were generally pretty cruel to me. Excluding me from all activity's, pushing, hair pulling, getting locked in a dog kennels, spying on me in the bathroom, ect. At the time I didn't realize it was bullying and since no one intervened I assumed it was normal. Another time a much older person hit me a couple times and went a few yards away to laugh about with someone he didn't even like, which was humiliating. By now I've put it all behind me but when I was a kid it messed me up a little. I admit I still occasionally wonder why they treated me that way.

  5. #355
    Senior Member Pinker85's Avatar
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    Meh. Bullying. I don't know. It possibly depends on ur definition.

    I've definitely bullied people in the past. I once ganged up on a girl with another girl, she had first started out friends, actually we all were, then one of the girls got upset at the other girl and she was ousted. I don't even recall the extent of cruelty but it made her cry at one point. I knew it was wrong but I wanted to be liked so I went along. I do recall though, the meeting in which the girl cried, another girl was present, a friend, really in the truest sense, and she defended this girl with such brilliance and beauty ... At one point I said to her, u do realize this other girl talks badly behind ur back, it was true, she didn't bat an eyelash and said, I don't believe that. The loyalty made me feel ashamed, even then.

    But it's still something I do occasionally, ok, I can see how there r instances even in my everyday life where I can be a bit of a dick ... Those could be considered bullying.

    If u genuinely have never bullied before, that's awesome ... Great that such kindness can be found in the world. But I'm guilty. I think because of that I'm not so hard on people that bully, especially kids. Crap I still have difficulty even as an adult. More than a few times I've said something behind someone's back with less than kind intent, more than a few times inserted a sharp jab in a conversation when someone had irked me. I try. Mostly things happen. I assume when others have bullied me it was more of stuff happening, where shit they weren't monsters ... Just circumstances.
    "My comrades and my beloved, upon your way you shall meet men with hoofs; give them your wings. And men with horns; give them wreaths of laurel. And men with claws; give them petals for fingers. And men with forked tongues; give them honey words." --Kahlil Gibran, The Garden of The Prophet

  6. #356
    Senior Member Proctor's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pinker85 View Post
    Meh. Bullying. I don't know. It possibly depends on ur definition.

    I've definitely bullied people in the past. I once ganged up on a girl with another girl, she had first started out friends, actually we all were, then one of the girls got upset at the other girl and she was ousted. I don't even recall the extent of cruelty but it made her cry at one point. I knew it was wrong but I wanted to be liked so I went along. I do recall though, the meeting in which the girl cried, another girl was present, a friend, really in the truest sense, and she defended this girl with such brilliance and beauty ... At one point I said to her, u do realize this other girl talks badly behind ur back, it was true, she didn't bat an eyelash and said, I don't believe that. The loyalty made me feel ashamed, even then.

    But it's still something I do occasionally, ok, I can see how there r instances even in my everyday life where I can be a bit of a dick ... Those could be considered bullying.

    If u genuinely have never bullied before, that's awesome ... Great that such kindness can be found in the world. But I'm guilty. I think because of that I'm not so hard on people that bully, especially kids. Crap I still have difficulty even as an adult. More than a few times I've said something behind someone's back with less than kind intent, more than a few times inserted a sharp jab in a conversation when someone had irked me. I try. Mostly things happen. I assume when others have bullied me it was more of stuff happening, where shit they weren't monsters ... Just circumstances.
    That's an interesting thought. What you perceive as just being thoughtless could be seen as bullying by others.

    I think there are times where I acted in a way that could be called bullying. I wouldn't have thought so at the time, but my overly blunt and argumentative manner has resulted in upsetting others, even causing them to cry. I've also taken the dominant role in one or two relationships and it could easily be perceived as bullying by an outside party. Despite the fact that my partner preferred being in a submissive position.

  7. #357
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    I have been bullied for most of my life---I am not really sure why.


    I`m not normal, so I suppose that`s usually motivation enough. Now, I hardly react, and it doesn`t really bother me, but I more or less expect it. I have become pretty peculiar about the type of environments I avoid, and types of people I associate with now because of it. I think it must be because I am quiet, and don`t really brag, or talk myself up.

    It has always more or less cemented my sense of feeling disconnected and almost like an alien. Oddly enough, I am considered reasonably attractive as well, but it does not often seem to make very much of a different; I think if anything, it just attracts more strange attention.
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  8. #358
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    Whenever I changed schools, I was usually teased for being "odd".

    (Un)Fortunately, I was extremely antisocial as a teenling and would fight and threaten people to leave me alone. I think it made me less of an interesting target but people will always gossip and make fun.

    Having obvious sensitivities and a less assertive personality definitely makes one more of a target though.
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  9. #359
    Senior Member evilrubberduckie's Avatar
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    for a strong 8 wing im suprised I never bullied. if anything I got bullied.

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  10. #360

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    I bullied peers in my early years and authority figures in my young adult years.

    Early year bullying was entirely physical. I picked fist fights with kids of both genders looking to get a rush and have a good power struggle.

    Young adult years involved more psychological. Most figures just sucked it up and kept their mouths shut. One confronted me politely and asked me to stop; I did. Another showed such a great level of patience and humility that I ended up admiring him. Only those two earned my respect.

    That said, I look back now with a great mixture of embarrassment and disbelief at most of my behavior. I was young, with a lot of energy, and just looking for a way to get a reaction out of my surroundings. It was rarely about the people as individuals.

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