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Thread: Bullying

  1. #311
    Klingon Warrior Princess Patches's Avatar
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    I disagree that victims of social exclusion are primarily female. Social exclusion happens within both genders. Especially in highschool, which is where my point of reference comes from. Think of the nerdy/awkward boys and how the popular/jocks treat them. Furthermore, I would think that physical bullying inherently carries emotional damage with it... Meaning that physical bullying is both physical and emotional, whereas emotional bullying is purely that.

    I wouldn't encourage either within our schools, but given a PERSONAL choice for myself? I put much less stock in social relationships than the vast majority of people, I think. Feeling excluded would hardly be an issue for me. And so, I stand by my statement. For me as an individual... I would rather face social exclusion than have 3 females kicking me while I curl up in the fetal position.
    “Everybody has a secret world inside of them. All of the people of the world, I mean everybody. No matter how dull and boring they are on the outside, inside
    them they've all got unimaginable, magnificent, wonderful, stupid, amazing worlds. Not just one world. Hundreds of them. Thousands maybe.” -Neil Gaiman

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  2. #312
    Senior Member Bamboo's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Illmatic View Post
    I got this dude in my school he's really big and a rugby player and I'm kinda short 5'5 skinny built. I am well liked by people and got quite a lot of friends but every time he gives me shit for some reason. Throwing potato chips at me, slapping me on the back of the around out of nowhere, making dirty comments about me...it's fucking shit cuz i can't do anything about it. I'm always scared around him because I know I'm the likely target. Sometimes i just wish he would die or something and just go away. Maybe it's because i act like a clown always joking and so I become an easier target but fuck it's annoying. IDK what to do.

    What are some shit of yours?
    Sounds a lot like some kid in high school that used to give me shit for no reason, yelling stuff at me, that kinda thing. I was mostly confused as to why he was giving me shit so I just observed him when I saw him, like in my weight lifting class. At some point I was looking at him walking by and he suddenly said in a sorta friendly tone "oh hey, how are you?" He wasn't really asking, of course, but he wasn't acting the way he was before. I never had issues with him again.

    In retrospect I think it was just a matter of me observing him, making eye contact, and not being observably threatened that made him change his tone. I think bullied kids might think there is some extraordinary measures that need take place to stop it because they feel so bad about it (response proportional to their emotional reaction), but really I think a large part of it is just not making a good target. Small, simple things.

    Turn frustration in curiosity. Try to figure the guy out.
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  3. #313
    & Badger, Ratty and Toad Mole's Avatar
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    Odd Girl Out

    Quote Originally Posted by Patches View Post
    I disagree that victims of social exclusion are primarily female. Social exclusion happens within both genders. Especially in highschool, which is where my point of reference comes from. Think of the nerdy/awkward boys and how the popular/jocks treat them. Furthermore, I would think that physical bullying inherently carries emotional damage with it... Meaning that physical bullying is both physical and emotional, whereas emotional bullying is purely that.

    I wouldn't encourage either within our schools, but given a PERSONAL choice for myself? I put much less stock in social relationships than the vast majority of people, I think. Feeling excluded would hardly be an issue for me. And so, I stand by my statement. For me as an individual... I would rather face social exclusion than have 3 females kicking me while I curl up in the fetal position.
    Perhaps if you read the literature, starting with, "Odd Girl Out - the Hidden Culture of Aggression In Girls", by Rachel Simmons, you may change your mind.

    I hope so, for I would hate to think any moderator was complicit with group bullying and social exclusion.

  4. #314
    Insert witty line here... Ponyboy's Avatar
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    I have to agree with Patches here. I didn't have issues at school, but at home. I would have much preferred to have been ignored than to be beaten on a daily basis. And how is her giving her opinion being complicit with bullying? Everything I have seen from her in the 2 "bully" threads has been honest at worst, stand-up commendable at best!
    I'm never wrong, I'm just sometimes less right

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  6. #316
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    Quote Originally Posted by chana View Post
    what a waste of drugs
    lulz.

    Though not a waste, a sacrifice.

    Pawn for a bishop.

  7. #317
    Senior Member Richardsen's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by 93JC View Post
    The Tombstone of Undertaker

    What a knock down O.o


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  8. #318
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    Is this topic still open? I've been both the victim of bullying and also I've been the bully. I think most bullies are like this. I hated the feeling of being a victim but also now that I'm older, I realized something. During those times when I was being bullied in school I never realized that it could have a somewhat chain reaction wherein I end up bullying my younger cousins. This happened years ago though. I don't "bully" my younger cousins anymore or anyone for that matter. But whenever I remember the times where I was verbally harassing and physically hurting my younger cousin I feel pretty damn bad about it now. I made it a point to be nicer to her, treat her to movies and the like. I think age gap also has a factor in bullying? I'm not sure but from the way I see it and have experienced it with my family, the little ones tend to be bullied by the older ones. I treat my cousins like they were siblings because like I said, I don't have any.

    I come from a damn big family, and my cousins and I are all very close. No one bullies each other from my generation because we're all grown up now. But when we were younger, omg we'd be kicking, yelling, pushing and shoving each other lol.

    At home I'm a little bit at ease with everyone, I'm able to laugh and hang with family and friends. Kid and fool around with them. I do have my limits though. I have always been reserved. My tantrums normally involve when someone keeps pushing my buttons. I tend to get ticked off easily, and I'm ashamed to admit it but my younger cousins tend to take the heat of my temper. In school however I'm completely opposite. I'm the bullied one, and extremely so.

    So I'm thinking these two are actually related somehow? I laugh more when I'm home and I'm more "relaxed". I'm never relaxed, I'm always agitated or nervous about something. And also I can't have alot of people around me so much. I need space even from family. I'm still the hermit type even up to now. I can't handle being around big and rowdy crowds I don't understand why. I get extremely cranky and irritated when I have people over because I seriously need my space. Like when my mom has friends over or there's a party at home, I just usually say hi, and go immediately to my room and hide. Even when we have family gatherings I'm like this. Not unless the party is outside the house. I can only hang with a few people at a time and I guess they probably think I'm like a leech or something coz I only stick to them lol. Yeah that kinda sucks but that's me.

    So anyway, uhm, I don't think this helped much at all lol, sorry @_@

  9. #319
    I'm not Trunks
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    I despised bullies..

  10. #320
    Senior Member Stigmata's Avatar
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    While I don't condone the act of bullying, I believe there's a lesson to be learned through it. I see it as somewhat of a rite of passage that test one's ability to conquer or be conquered, as the essential components behind bullying(one person exerting their power over another to infringe upon their right, be it by physical or non-physical force) generally persist long beyond the playground. You either learn to deal with it in some manner (ignore it, fight back physically, verbally, or mentally) or succumb to it. At some point or another, we all must learn to assert ourselves, as we live imperfect, amoral existence in which the strong are established by stepping over and exploiting the weak. To me, I see it as a basic test of one's fight-or-flight instinct; At some point you either adapt or cower, with the outcome generally setting the tone for one's general method for conflict resolution.

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