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Thread: Bullying

  1. #261

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    I'm beginning to wish that the assholes who're stalking me on Amazon would catch leprosy.
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  2. #262
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lark View Post
    I'm beginning to wish that the assholes who're stalking me on Amazon would catch leprosy.
    Pick a different disease. Leprosy is generally easily curable these days. Ebola is better.

  3. #263
    One day and the next Rainne's Avatar
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    The only way to get rid of bullying is to confront it. Show them you're not scared and you're ready to take them on.

  4. #264
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rainne View Post
    The only way to get rid of bullying is to confront it. Show them you're not scared and you're ready to take them on.
    Depends on the type of abuse that is taking place. I can tell you talking back will not stop group verbal mobbing, it just adds fuel to the fire if they see a reaction.

    And before the suggestion is made to take it to the next level: How many little girls are ready to "take on" an entire mixed gender classroom group with their fists?

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    Quote Originally Posted by heart View Post
    Depends on the type of abuse that is taking place. I can tell you talking back will not stop group verbal mobbing, it just adds fuel to the fire if they see a reaction.

    And before the suggestion is made to take it to the next level: How many little girls are ready to "take on" an entire mixed gender classroom group with their fists?
    Well, I'm not too experienced w/ female bullying (I hear it's worse than male bullying) or mob vs. one (this is really cruel) bullying for that matter, but for 1-3 vs. 1 encounters, ask them what the fuck their problem is, and if they continue, tell them to back the fuck off, and if that doesn't work, ask if they want to fight head on physically. Sure you'll get hurt (bring more friends if you want to mitigate damage). Honestly, some people are just stupid and can't talk things out, only physical confrontation gets into their brain. Then again, I'm a ISTP and we're usually really easy going people, but if you invade our personal space for no specific reason, we'll go berserk on you.

    Everyone has their own solution and approaches, find out which works best for you.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Rainne View Post
    Well, I'm not too experienced w/ female bullying (I hear it's worse than male bullying) or mob vs. one (this is really cruel) bullying for that matter, but for 1-3 vs. 1 encounters, ask them what the fuck their problem is, and if they continue, tell them to back the fuck off, and if that doesn't work, ask if they want to fight head on physically. Sure you'll get hurt (bring more friends if you want to mitigate damage). Honestly, some people are just stupid and can't talk things out, only physical confrontation gets into their brain. Then again, I'm a ISTP and we're usually really easy going people, but if you invade our personal space for no specific reason, we'll go berserk on you.

    Everyone has their own solution and approaches, find out which works best for you.
    Oh, Rainne, you make it sound way too easy...
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bubbles View Post
    Oh, Rainne, you make it sound way too easy...
    From my experience it's all right. Then again, I really don't get picked on much, it only happened once. What fuckheads.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Rainne View Post
    From my experience it's all right. Then again, I really don't get picked on much, it only happened once. What fuckheads.
    I'm glad it worked for you. I've had different experiences but most were unfortunately verbal, not physical. Both types are dreadful, and arguably I got the better end of the two, but it doesn't quite feel that way. The after-affects just....suck, haha. You consciously have to poo-poo them and tell them they're wrong beliefs about yourself.
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    According to Zakk Wylde the best policy is to bite their manhood off and french kiss it back in to their mouth.
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    than to serve and obey them. - David Hume

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    Quote Originally Posted by substitute View Post
    I'm pretty sure that everyone experiences instances of bullying at some point in their lives. Some deal with it better than others; some head it off at the pass and it becomes just a series of isolated and rare events, whilst others don't manage to neutralize it early enough or at all, and end up being ground down by it for years.

    I suffered from ruthless bullying all the way through school and it cut my self-esteem into ribbons and contributed to my spending the first 20 years of my life pretty downtrodden and very isolated.

    I've learned that the choice of who gets bullied can be pretty arbitrary and is mainly nothing to do with the actual qualities or characteristics of the victim themselves. But if there is any deciding factor it's this: bullies only pick on people who they believe will not fight back. But the crucial factor in 'successful' bullying is that the victim must not glimpse this thruth: the victim must absolutely believe that they really ARE ugly, dumb, that nobody likes them, that they're not worthy of being treated as a human being. Because if they begin to realize the BS level of what the bullies tell them then they just might start fighting back.

    But I've learned that simply losing my temper and yelling doesn't help - it didn't work at school either. If I did that, the bullies would just laugh at me and then I'd feel ten times worse. So the only way to check-mate it is to unleash my inner sadist and throw some barb that makes them feel ten times shittier than they wanted to make me feel. But not everyone has it in them to do this.

    Is that it then? It's rather sad if that's it; if the choice is to either bully or be bullied. There must be another way.

    I'd like if people here could talk about their experiences of bullying, and if anyone's found a way to deal with it, what is it?

    Parents - how do you deal with it when your children get bullied?

    I'm interested in comments from people who might be or have been bullies themselves. I want to explore the mindset of both bully and victim, in the hope that I'll be inspired with *something* to tell my 11 year old daughter when she comes home crying again tomorrow
    Actually i have been both, bullied and the bully. To be honest neither in extreams, and probably not in the sense you mean. The two occaisions where i have bullied were one off's to two different people but as they were people that were regulary bullied i should have been protecting them not being spiteful.
    Both of those situations were befor the age of 11 and i felt crappy about it at the time because i felt i behaived badly. I'm not sure why i did it, probably to feel powerful for some reason but really i didn't, i felt shitty.
    The times i was bullied were again occaisions rather than ongoing and by older groups of kids. I think i just felt powerless and embarrassed, Probably Karma. I found that when i got to around 13 it never happened again mainly because people either liked me or thought i was too wierd/crazy to mess with. Actually there was this one occaision when i was about 14 when i had been overheard talking about a girl called Alison and her new boyfriend. She happened to share her name with another pupil and consequently i got surrounded by a large group of girls (friends of the Alison i didn't know) trying to get me to fight this girl who i didn't know called Alison.
    That was a tricky situation and i got out of it the same way i got into it, by pure chance, but maybe it's not bullying in the sense you mean.
    I think school bullies tend to be bullies because either they get bullied at home or they have other bad things happening to them that they can't control so they try to control others situations.
    Personally, in regards to my own child/children, if the school didn't sort out the problem i would go to the parents. If that still didn't help i'd take my child out of the school.
    I saw some awful bullying going on at school and some very depressed kids because of it. I'm very assertive and always stood up for myself and i also stood up for other people, i ended up being a bit of a peacemaker in a roundabout way.
    "We knew he was someone who had a tragic flaw, that's where his greatness came from"

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