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Thread: Bullying

  1. #141
    Junior Member Array Cirrus's Avatar
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    I've been bullied all of my highschool life - I came in half way during the first year after friendship groups had already been made, and we had moved there just then so I didn't know anyone from the previous school, either.

    I think I had a very INFJ reaction to bullying. Because of bullying I sank a little into depression, but it didn't seem to work - although passive-aggressive I've never been one to take shit and start to believe it. But it did make me want to constantly evaluate myself and every day on the way to school I would 'renew' myself by creating a new "me" - it's kind of difficult to understand, perhaps another INFJ will get what I'm talking about.

    The more bullied I got, the more I felt inadequate and had to do this, compulsively. I also started withdrawing more into myself and even at a young age at about twelve or thirteen I saw it as a "shell" or "shield", and imagined it around me, strengthening each time I took what I considered to be a "blow" (even though I've never been physically bullied, it's always been verbal because all the bullies I've ever encountered were wimps... =P) and it would get tougher and tougher with each one.

    Over time I am still one of the most hated people in the year, I have never had more than two or three friends, we've banded together and managed to stick it out. I am now very tough towards bullying, and put on my perfect "shield" which unfortunately makes me unsociable and cold towards any stranger because I don't trust them any more.

    I know other people get severely under-confident from bullying and just can't take it - for me, it only made me stronger. I do regret not at least experiencing what a happy, confident, popular life would be like at school (I would probably have made more academic progress with that too) but I think it was a good experience all the same for making me stronger.

    I wonder if this is just my personal way of dealing with it but it seems very INFJ-ish to me.

    Also - my best friend deals with it in a very opposite manner - I tend to try and use irony and wit against bullies or else just completely ignore them, perhaps making them feel uncomfortable by showing they do not scare or intimidate me. She on the other hand gets aggressive and confused, and they know they'll get a good reaction out of her, so she gets much more hassle than I do.

  2. #142
    brat Array Mitzy's Avatar
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    whats wrong with bullying every now & then.
    it adds character
    She talks pretty but says mean things

  3. #143
    Senior Member Array Moiety's Avatar
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    Always had a short fuse for pushovers so never really had a problem. It was kinda shitty having to babysit some of the more weak-minded of my friends, though. I can't understand how some people just don't have the urge to stand up for themselves.

    Quote Originally Posted by Mitzy View Post
    whats wrong with bullying every now & then.
    it adds character
    To whom exactly?

  4. #144
    A GOD Array Mace's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mitzy View Post
    whats wrong with bullying every now & then.
    it adds character
    ... are you a sad person?

  5. #145
    Senior Member Array Kyrielle's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MrME View Post
    Hi all, it's really funny (weird funny, not ha-ha funny) that there's a thread like this stickied at the top of the forum. I logged in today to see if I could gather some information about bullying for a horror script that I'm currently writing.

    I have plenty of personal experience when it comes to bullying, I was pretty much the whipping boy for a lot of assholes in my graduating class. But, these were boys bullying boys.

    I need information about how girls bully other girls. Anecdotes are ideal, but general viewpoints or opinions from women who were bullied as kids would also be very helpful. I'll be sure to comb through the thread, too, so people won't have to repeat themselves.
    With girls:

    Imagine a pack of wolves. Now imagine that pack circling around a herd of deer. Imagine them slowly singling out one person who they perceive to be the weakest. All right, now imagine the wolves unendingly isolating that person and managing to turn the entire herd of deer against that isolated one. The wolves never eat the deer. They only nibble on it, bite it, shove it when it starts to look like it's getting tired/stronger.

    That's what girls do. All of this is verbal, by the way. None of it is ever physical, but it's that same kind of subtle manipulation that ends up becoming unnoticed until it's too late.

    Quote Originally Posted by Mitzy View Post
    whats wrong with bullying every now & then.
    it adds character
    Not cool. It's that kind of attitude that allows bullies to thrive in the first place. Bullying destroys character rather than builds it.
    "I took the one less traveled by,
    And that has made all the difference."

    Robert Frost

  6. #146
    Senior Member Array MrME's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mitzy View Post
    whats wrong with bullying every now & then.
    it adds character
    Incorrect. It's only destructive to the victims.
    INFJ
    4w5

  7. #147
    brat Array Mitzy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MrME View Post
    Incorrect. It's only destructive to the victims.
    oh god. why are you guys being uptight. obviously i was joking. well maybe not so obviously since apparently my sarcasm didnt get through too well.

    bullying? what do i think about it? i think its a waste of time. no one should ever put in their own effort and/or energy just for the sake to make ANOTHER ONE'S life [who would even bother to care?] miserable. i was never bullied and i never did bully anyone...

    i think most people bully because they want a challenge. they see something weak that they want to make stronger or see a reaction from the 'victim'.
    sometimes people bully because theyre actually afraid of the other person. kids dont have a big in-depth opinion on people. they have a general idea of what is "normal" and what isnt so when they see something strange, they want to go away and they usually resort to some sort of verbal abuse or physical [its in our instincts to do so, most kids dont know how to channel this]. other just want to show off how tough they are because they are actually insecure about themselves and want to put up a front...maybe that will keep them from being bullied by others as well or maybe they just want to seem stronger.

    again, i think a lot of this has to do with instincts and "behavioral manifestations of fight-or-flight"
    kids are just most likely to be prone to this because they are less developed.
    She talks pretty but says mean things

  8. #148
    Was E.laur Array Laurie's Avatar
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    People are uptight about it because it greatly affected them.

  9. #149
    brat Array Mitzy's Avatar
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    oh well im sorry i dont carry around sympathy in my bag but i'll send you all flowers next time. idk what else you want me to do or say besides give my opinion as to why people do it...i believe i gave some valid info & my point of view as an innocent bystander
    She talks pretty but says mean things

  10. #150
    Senior Member Array Kyrielle's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mitzy View Post
    oh well im sorry i dont carry around sympathy in my bag but i'll send you all flowers next time. idk what else you want me to do or say besides give my opinion as to why people do it...i believe i gave some valid info & my point of view as an innocent bystander
    Regardless of what you do or do not carry around in your bag, surely you realise that when you posted that it was a rather charged statement (kidding or not) for such a topic given the replies. Was kinda asking for trouble.
    "I took the one less traveled by,
    And that has made all the difference."

    Robert Frost

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