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Thread: Deep shame

  1. #1
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    Default Deep shame

    so..I seem to have a permanently guilty conscience for reasons I don't understand. A deep sense of shame, and lately it has been really bothering me.

    Just to clarify some things..I've never killed anyone, never been in a fight, never stolen things, never physically hurt an animal or human, never cheated in a relationship, never bullied or tormented someone, never committed fraud, never been arrested, etc.

    So what am I feeling this shame for? Maybe it's from low self esteem, social anxiety, feeling guilt that I have not reached goals? Does anyone else relate?
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    I could do things Hard's Avatar
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    This is something you should talk to a therapist about. It's very likely this is deep seated and would take a lot of work to tease out.
    MBTI: ExxJ tetramer
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    Quote Originally Posted by birdseye View Post
    So what am I feeling this shame for? Maybe it's from low self esteem, social anxiety, feeling guilt that I have not reached goals? Does anyone else relate?
    Or maybe you have a destructive parent who knew how to pull your strings and you just haven't put it all together yet?

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    Maybe you're just an E 4!!!
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    Senior Member prplchknz's Avatar
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    I've been told I have shame but its more of I'm scared of being judged harshly and scared of what comes after I do 90% of possible actions.
    In no likes experiment.

    that is all

    i dunno what else to say so

  6. #6
    darkened dreams labyrinthine's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by birdseye View Post
    so..I seem to have a permanently guilty conscience for reasons I don't understand. A deep sense of shame, and lately it has been really bothering me.

    Just to clarify some things..I've never killed anyone, never been in a fight, never stolen things, never physically hurt an animal or human, never cheated in a relationship, never bullied or tormented someone, never committed fraud, never been arrested, etc.

    So what am I feeling this shame for? Maybe it's from low self esteem, social anxiety, feeling guilt that I have not reached goals? Does anyone else relate?
    During your development years, was there ever an authority figure who treated you unkindly? Anyone who hurt you?

    Very young children don't understand the world and tend to absorb the worldview that their trusted authority figures present them. It is usually a great survival instinct to do this, but when the authority figures are dysfunctional and harmful, then it creates a deep, subconscious, distorted view of the world. It could even be a kindergarten teacher, a Sunday School teacher, an aunt, or anyone who you trusted. This can also result from millions of tiny, micro-attacks in what would otherwise appear to be a reasonably functional environment. If the child is especially intelligent, sensitive, and perceptive, then the impact can be greater than average.

    Children who have been abused are especially vulnerable to this free-floating guilt that keeps trying to map to something in reality and often results in feeling disproportionately guilty for small things. I deal with it myself.
    Step into my metaphysical room of mirrors.
    Fear of reality creates myopic morality
    So I guess it means there is trouble until the robins come
    (from Blue Velvet)

    I want to be just like my mother, even if she is bat-shit crazy.
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