• You are currently viewing our forum as a guest, which gives you limited access to view most discussions and access our other features. By joining our free community, you will have access to additional post topics, communicate privately with other members (PM), view blogs, respond to polls, upload content, and access many other special features. Registration is fast, simple and absolutely free, so please join our community today! Just click here to register. You should turn your Ad Blocker off for this site or certain features may not work properly. If you have any problems with the registration process or your account login, please contact us by clicking here.

Extravert Prejudice

Qlip

Post Human Post
Joined
Jul 30, 2010
Messages
8,464
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
4w5
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
I know Introverts get a bad lot here in the US, but today I found my holy ire rising, prompting me to rise to the occasion to defend extraverts. I was at the lunch table with coworkers when the subject of a lady at a Mexican restaurant came up. Two people kept referring to her as crazy, the crazy lady, in a clearly derogatory way. I met this lady once, she was incredibly lively and fun. She owned the restaurant, she would banter with the customers while they were in line for their orders, she turned up Salsa music and told everybody to dance, she called all the men 'guapos' she didn't seem crazy to me.

So, I asked for clarification as to why she was crazy, I thought maybe I had missed something. They said it was because she was loud and always happy. That pissed me off and I corrected them (calmly). I told them that it didn't sound crazy to me, and that it sounds to me like she just enjoys interacting with people and it probably brings people into her restaurant. Some at the table agreed with me, the perps shrugged it off, not convinced. I must have sounded serious, as there was awkward silence (heh).

There's a lot of down in the world, and this lady was an up. She's amazing, I wish I were like that. I feel like I want to show them crazy, now.
 

Starry

Active member
Joined
May 22, 2010
Messages
6,103
I'm worried that my comments will somehow interfere with the desire and subsequent action of you showing these two walking deads what crazy really looks like but...

Between the three of them...we all know who goes to sleep at night happy.
 

Starry

Active member
Joined
May 22, 2010
Messages
6,103
^^I'm kinda cracking up right now because I'm thinking "is my post redundant?" (to the OP) haha. Maybe I'll fly down and show your co-workers what crazy is.
 

Qlip

Post Human Post
Joined
Jul 30, 2010
Messages
8,464
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
4w5
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
I'm worried that my comments will somehow interfere with the desire and subsequent action of you showing these two walking deads what crazy really looks like but...

Between the three of them...we all know who goes to sleep at night happy.

I suppose I understand them feeling threatened by her, but that's no reason to insult her. I suppose some people feel like enforcing their concept of 'normal' makes them feel safe, but this alienates good people. I thought the one guy was a snob already, but I *was* giving him the benefit of the doubt.
 

Starry

Active member
Joined
May 22, 2010
Messages
6,103
I want to see.

Oh cool! We'll get a date set. And until then... I mean, I guess I should say here for informational purposes (not like I'm bragging) that I am considered one of the best of all time in acting crazy so idk... depending on your own personal sensitivities and experiences... maybe start by first watching less crazy people do stuff...


I suppose I understand them feeling threatened by her, but that's no reason to insult her. I suppose some people feel like enforcing their concept of 'normal' makes them feel safe, but this alienates good people. I thought the one guy was a snob already, but I *was* giving him the benefit of the doubt.

I actually worked in a department that was 'introvert heavy' and saw so much of what you are describing but I'm not sure how to talk about it without pissing off a forum of introverts. I can understand "this person makes me feel tired" or "wow, that person sure is upbeat! time to go home to my books and cats!" But that's not what I witnessed. Yes, from what I learned there and in spite of what scientific research has to say, extrovertion and happiness are the sure signs of idiocy.
 

Rasofy

royal member
Joined
Mar 7, 2011
Messages
5,881
MBTI Type
INTP
Enneagram
5w6
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
Dem introverts need to check their privilege.

Wait, I'm doing this wrong.
 
G

Ginkgo

Guest
It sounds like it might be prejudice of another sort, since she's not only Latino, but seems to fall into the stereotype of "Fiery Latino". I say that also because U.S. harbors a very sort of extraverted energy in its culture and not very many people here complain about the more characteristic versions of it. Or, rather, the complaints aren't very vocal.
 

digesthisickness

✿ڿڰۣஇღ♥ wut ♥ღஇڿڰۣ✿
Joined
Apr 24, 2007
Messages
3,248
MBTI Type
ENTP
Some people just hate what's different. Love that box. Lick it.
 

Southern Kross

Away with the fairies
Joined
Dec 22, 2008
Messages
2,910
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
4w5
Instinctual Variant
so/sp
I know Introverts get a bad lot here in the US, but today I found my holy ire rising, prompting me to rise to the occasion to defend extraverts. I was at the lunch table with coworkers when the subject of a lady at a Mexican restaurant came up. Two people kept referring to her as crazy, the crazy lady, in a clearly derogatory way. I met this lady once, she was incredibly lively and fun. She owned the restaurant, she would banter with the customers while they were in line for their orders, she turned up Salsa music and told everybody to dance, she called all the men 'guapos' she didn't seem crazy to me.

So, I asked for clarification as to why she was crazy, I thought maybe I had missed something. They said it was because she was loud and always happy. That pissed me off and I corrected them (calmly). I told them that it didn't sound crazy to me, and that it sounds to me like she just enjoys interacting with people and it probably brings people into her restaurant. Some at the table agreed with me, the perps shrugged it off, not convinced. I must have sounded serious, as there was awkward silence (heh).

There's a lot of down in the world, and this lady was an up. She's amazing, I wish I were like that. I feel like I want to show them crazy, now.
Yeah, I've heard people say this sort of things. It bothers me too.

There's a pub quiz I go to and people in my team (including my mother) make derogatory remarks about this (likely) ENFP woman in another team, whom we've known for a while. She's cheerful, fun and jokes around a bit, but she's never over the top or in your face. I think she's a lovely, enthusiastic and funny woman, but others roll their eyes and say she's ridiculous and irritating. It's just so unwarranted and unfair.
 

Z Buck McFate

Pepperidge Farm remembers.
Joined
Aug 25, 2009
Messages
6,048
Enneagram
5w4
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
I suppose I understand them feeling threatened by her, but that's no reason to insult her. I suppose some people feel like enforcing their concept of 'normal' makes them feel safe, but this alienates good people. I thought the one guy was a snob already, but I *was* giving him the benefit of the doubt.

Yeah, that's what I'd chalk it up to as well. It's just sad, how insecurity makes people act that way. Part of me also wants to say it's jealousy: if they aren't allowed to be free spirits and still love who they are, then (in their universe) other people shouldn't either.
 

Evo

Unapologetic being
Joined
Jul 1, 2011
Messages
3,160
MBTI Type
XNTJ
Enneagram
1w9
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
Yeah, that's what I'd chalk it up to as well. It's just sad, how insecurity makes people act that way. Part of me also wants to say it's jealousy: if they aren't allowed to be free spirits and still love who they are, then (in their universe) other people shouldn't either.

Yes. It's that simple. I often want there to be more complexity to the reasons why people act as they do. But it's often exactly what you've said.
 

five sounds

MyPeeSmellsLikeCoffee247
Joined
Jul 17, 2013
Messages
5,393
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
729
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
I've heard this kind of thing before and it bothers me. I'm much more like that lady than I'm comfortable with sometimes. Growing up, I remember a conscious 'chilling out' of my happy, enthusiastic demeanor because of not wanting to rub people the wrong way or be judged for it. I still try to keep it in check, and only really let it out all the way when I know I'm among company who won't be bothered by it. Other times, I see it as a great gift and use my natural crazy to liven up situations or to make things fun for myself.

I agree with what starry said about people with an upbeat demeanor being written off as stupid by some, and it really is unfair. I think it might be hard for some introverts to see people like that and believe that they think about all the messed up parts of life too. It's just a different style of dealing with it, for me anyway.
 

gromit

likes this
Joined
Mar 3, 2010
Messages
6,508
It sounds like it might be prejudice of another sort, since she's not only Latino, but seems to fall into the stereotype of "Fiery Latino".

Yes this option occurred to me as well...
 
Top