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Thread: Extravert Prejudice

  1. #11
    Away with the fairies Array Southern Kross's Avatar
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    Dec 2008
    4w5 so/sp


    Quote Originally Posted by Qlip View Post
    I know Introverts get a bad lot here in the US, but today I found my holy ire rising, prompting me to rise to the occasion to defend extraverts. I was at the lunch table with coworkers when the subject of a lady at a Mexican restaurant came up. Two people kept referring to her as crazy, the crazy lady, in a clearly derogatory way. I met this lady once, she was incredibly lively and fun. She owned the restaurant, she would banter with the customers while they were in line for their orders, she turned up Salsa music and told everybody to dance, she called all the men 'guapos' she didn't seem crazy to me.

    So, I asked for clarification as to why she was crazy, I thought maybe I had missed something. They said it was because she was loud and always happy. That pissed me off and I corrected them (calmly). I told them that it didn't sound crazy to me, and that it sounds to me like she just enjoys interacting with people and it probably brings people into her restaurant. Some at the table agreed with me, the perps shrugged it off, not convinced. I must have sounded serious, as there was awkward silence (heh).

    There's a lot of down in the world, and this lady was an up. She's amazing, I wish I were like that. I feel like I want to show them crazy, now.
    Yeah, I've heard people say this sort of things. It bothers me too.

    There's a pub quiz I go to and people in my team (including my mother) make derogatory remarks about this (likely) ENFP woman in another team, whom we've known for a while. She's cheerful, fun and jokes around a bit, but she's never over the top or in your face. I think she's a lovely, enthusiastic and funny woman, but others roll their eyes and say she's ridiculous and irritating. It's just so unwarranted and unfair.
    INFP 4w5 so/sp

    I've dreamt in my life dreams that have stayed with me ever after, and changed my ideas;
    they've gone through and through me, like wine through water, and altered the colour of my mind.

    - Emily Bronte

  2. #12
    wants Mifune clone minion Array Z Buck McFate's Avatar
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    Aug 2009
    5w4 sx/sp


    Quote Originally Posted by Qlip View Post
    I suppose I understand them feeling threatened by her, but that's no reason to insult her. I suppose some people feel like enforcing their concept of 'normal' makes them feel safe, but this alienates good people. I thought the one guy was a snob already, but I *was* giving him the benefit of the doubt.
    Yeah, that's what I'd chalk it up to as well. It's just sad, how insecurity makes people act that way. Part of me also wants to say it's jealousy: if they aren't allowed to be free spirits and still love who they are, then (in their universe) other people shouldn't either.
    Reality is a collective hunch. -Lily Tomlin

    5w4 sx/sp Johari / Nohari

  3. #13
    . Array Urarienev's Avatar
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    Jul 2011
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    Quote Originally Posted by Z Buck McFate View Post
    Yeah, that's what I'd chalk it up to as well. It's just sad, how insecurity makes people act that way. Part of me also wants to say it's jealousy: if they aren't allowed to be free spirits and still love who they are, then (in their universe) other people shouldn't either.
    Yes. It's that simple. I often want there to be more complexity to the reasons why people act as they do. But it's often exactly what you've said.
    I'm that person that embodies pretty much everything that you hate.

    Unapologetically bonding in an uninhibited, propelled manner

    "Freedom is the right to tell people what they do not want to hear." ~ Eric


  4. #14
    Alma Array five sounds's Avatar
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    Jul 2013
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    I've heard this kind of thing before and it bothers me. I'm much more like that lady than I'm comfortable with sometimes. Growing up, I remember a conscious 'chilling out' of my happy, enthusiastic demeanor because of not wanting to rub people the wrong way or be judged for it. I still try to keep it in check, and only really let it out all the way when I know I'm among company who won't be bothered by it. Other times, I see it as a great gift and use my natural crazy to liven up situations or to make things fun for myself.

    I agree with what starry said about people with an upbeat demeanor being written off as stupid by some, and it really is unfair. I think it might be hard for some introverts to see people like that and believe that they think about all the messed up parts of life too. It's just a different style of dealing with it, for me anyway.
    You hem me in -- behind and before;
    you have laid your hand upon me.
    Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
    too lofty for me to attain.

  5. #15


    Quote Originally Posted by Ginkgo View Post
    It sounds like it might be prejudice of another sort, since she's not only Latino, but seems to fall into the stereotype of "Fiery Latino".
    Yes this option occurred to me as well...
    Your kisses, sweeter than honey. But guess what, so is my money.

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