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  1. #31
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    Quote Originally Posted by FLD View Post
    There's "appropriate" and there's "inappropriate." You personally don't mind being "inappropriate" because you're afraid that if you have to act "appropriate," it will limit your freedom. And the description in the OP says "....very concerned with their independence – want to be free in order to fulfill their visions and dreams."

    OTOH, acting "inappropriate" as your default mode ends up cutting you off from others and makes it difficult for you to form easy connections. And really, that's the answer to your question in the OP, as others have pointed out.

    If you ever want to explore "appropriate," there are "appropriate" ways to get things done that still preserve your freedom. For example, you could have blown off Halla74's original message but in an "appropriate" fashion by saying, "Thanks, I'll consider what you said." That response doesn't commit you to anything, but it also doesn't burn any bridges the way an inappropriate response does.

    It's easier to connect with people if you aren't always burning bridges.
    Yep I do a lot of things for more freedom. Good burn the bridges I can't burn them fast enough.

  2. #32
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    Quote Originally Posted by badger055 View Post
    Yep I do a lot of things for more freedom. Good burn the bridges I can't burn them fast enough.
    Your choice. Inappropriateness isn't a hanging crime; you're not committing any felonies by acting that way. But like I said, the issue of burning bridges is the answer to your question in the OP.

  3. #33
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    Quote Originally Posted by FLD View Post
    But like I said, the issue of burning bridges is the answer to your question in the OP.
    Unless you got a similar personality type you don't know what you are talking about. You can only comment as a spectator.

  4. #34
    untitled Chanaynay's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by badger055 View Post
    Look you aren't going to get it 6s don't understand what individualism is. I always aggravate 6s. So just drop it I'm not talking about this with you anymore.
    It's official - I'm convinced you're 13 years old. The avatar of the panda holding guns really supports my theory too.

    Quote Originally Posted by badger055 View Post
    I'm only taking advice from people who are similar to me rather than different
    At least this explains why you're constantly riding @Azure Flame's dick in every thread he posts in. Except at least that guy is a little more rational.

    Seriously, @Halla74 probably gave you the best advice. He was genuinely trying to help you and tried to be as clear and steady as possible, but you decided to get all reactive and go with the "YOU'RE NOT MY FATHER" bs. If you're genuinely trying to find happiness in life and get what you want out of it, that man you irrationally shut down is probably the most successful and happy people I know on this forum. His experience in life has made him all the wiser, but if you refuse to actually listen to people with an open mind and just keep doing things the way you want to do them hoping for different results, he (or most other people on this forum) can't help you. I would add more but Alex covered it all. When you're not busy whining over how the big mean man told you something you didn't want to hear, try reading what he said with an open mind next time.
    7w6 - 2w3 - 8w7 sx/so


  5. #35
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    Quote Originally Posted by badger055 View Post
    Unless you got a similar personality type you don't know what you are talking about. You can only comment as a spectator.
    Lol! It's not rocket science.

    You act like a dick, and you end up isolated. And in turn, when you meet someone new, you have to make snap decisions about whether you like them or not, because you know that soon enough you'll be shooting off your mouth and acting like a dick, topedoing any possible relationship.

    You're in a rut. Lose a little of the attitude and try a new approach.

  6. #36
    Senior Member prplchknz's Avatar
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    IRL people generally like me: You know why? because I stay true to myself, yet I respect others, I don't judge people. Yes I do form first impressions, but I don't let that keep me from knowing them. So yes you can be true to yourself, and not be a complete dick. I realize that people aren't going to do what I want and all I can control is my actions, and how I react to situations. I don't try to be friends with people I also don't push them away either. Not everyone is going to like me and I'm not going to like everyone, but I have no enemies. I have tons of aquaintences and people I can count on one hand that I'd call true friends. I'm smart enough to know when I should pick my battles (most of the time) clearly I was wrong about this one. I've also always had a curiousity about people. I want to know things, not because I plan on judging them for it, or for any malicious reason. I've also proven myself trustworthy, countless times
    In no likes experiment.

    that is all

    i dunno what else to say so

  7. #37
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    @Chanaynay

    lol oh hey chanaynay tell me how you really feel <3. Sorry but I'm not part of halla's fan club. If we are talking about success I doubt there is anyone on this forum who makes more than me. Just because you are older doesn't mean you are wiser. It doesn't give you the right to go around telling everyone how they should live their lives. I don't respond well to people who think they have moral superiority.

    Quote Originally Posted by FLD View Post
    Lol! It's not rocket science.

    You act like a dick, and you end up isolated. And in turn, when you meet someone new, you have to make snap decisions about whether you like them or not, because you know that soon enough you'll be shooting off your mouth and acting like a dick, topedoing any possible relationship.

    You're in a rut. Lose a little of the attitude and try a new approach.
    You call it isolating myself I call it filtering. I'm looking for the one in a milion. My filtering methods just need to get better. I'm not in a rut I never said I was. This was an off hand thing I thought I should look at.

  8. #38
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    Quote Originally Posted by badger055 View Post
    You call it isolating myself I call it filtering. I'm looking for the one in a milion. My filtering methods just need to get better. I'm not in a rut I never said I was. This was an off hand thing I thought I should look at.
    Okay, fair enough. You asked an offhand question, and I gave you an offhand response. We'll leave it at that.

  9. #39
    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
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    @OP

    Halla's post may be too far atm, for you to be able to relate to. It is however advice that you might find useful as you continue to grow as a person so...it might be wise to like..save it somewhere, for the future.

    I can understand why you relate more to Whocares and those that are more your style, it's only natural. And yes, their posts therefore will be of more use to you. I also suspect you probably didn't start this thread as asking for advice on how to fix this issue, but for a way to collect data points and other people's experiences that could help you grow in the way you want to grow.

    Right now, Hallas style of advice and being probably triggers a ton of rebellion in you coz it's too foreign still. I do believe though that you're actually doing exactly what you're meant to be doing - engaging people here, finding people that you can relate to and learn from and growing together with them, as we all do - at this particular time.

    I know you probably cannot imagine this right now, but I think it is possible that you'll end up with a variation of how Halla navigates the world - he is after all very close to your personality type, but he has a couple more years under his belt and his priorities and outlook on life have no doubt changed as he too grew as a person.
    With that in mind, I'm hoping that you'll find what you're looking for with this thread and that you hopefully get the space to figure this stuff out on your own terms.
    After all, growth, and change happen when people get the chance to stretch, grow and experience for themselves. And it usually works better when you're not asked to do things that - for the moment, or ever - may not make sense to you yet. And it seems that in your own way, this is what you are doing right now.

    One thing you might want to look into to find what you are looking for is wording things in a way that perhaps doesn't cause a stir with the general public - it seems that it would cloud the thread due to the responses it triggers which aren't of use to you at this particular time. While you certainly have the freedom to express your opinion, it can do a lot when you choose to optimise your communication style and might aid you in getting to our goal more swiftly. For instance, a simple acknowledgement that what you're aware you're expressing an unpopular opinion, but you want to explore this mindset further with people who might experience things the same way is often quite effective - especially here, on a forum dedicated to understanding yourself better. It is just a thought, though.

    And with that said - I know I'm not one of the people you'll likely find useful and relatable right now, so Imma bow out

    Happy hunting to ya
    ★ڿڰۣ✿ℒoѵℯ✿ڿڰۣ★





    "Harm none, do as ye will”

  10. #40
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    @badger055, nice that you can relate. Its also worth pointing out that I am, by the standards of society, an anomaly. I function in society, hold a job, do the things normal people do, but I wont ever be a part of society. And that's the choice I've consciously made and it suits me. If you ever desire to be a part of society then you will eventually need to conform (at least outwardly) to the ideals stated by the other posters here. Some may consider me unhealthy, disordered or whatever. I personally find no need to judge others relative mental state and dislike others judging mine. But its what people do.

    I pose no threat to others, have no desire to be malevolent and actually do hold empathy for others. I just don't express it in ways others understand or care about. I also have a mode of expression which is considered to be inappropriate by others so it makes me an outsider. The best I can do in life is to parrot the social customs people care so much about and otherwise live apart from society. I observe but I do not participate in any real way.

    It's not a lonely existence to me, but its not a fulfilling one either. It is what it is. Your life will be what you make of it too. Personally I dont think people raining condemnation upon you is really very helpful. As Amargith pointed out it will just cause you to reject what they have to say. You are questioning who you are, what you do and why you do it, so you can make conscious choice. There is nothing wrong with that.

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