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  1. #11
    Senior Member Survive & Stay Free's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by danseen View Post
    er.. abuse as in telling falsehoods? Criticising clients personally? Mocking their beliefs and value systems?

    But if you support unethical conduct, fine. Unless it happens to you, eh?
    You're an unknown poster to me and I'd assume possibly others, so it looks like you dropped randomly into an online forum looking for validation from strangers, within three or four posts of failing to get that validation you're in a flame war with another poster.

    It could just be me buddy but I'm guessing there's a pattern here.

    Sometimes when the same shit happens with different people, it really is you.

  2. #12
    Temporal Mechanic. Lexicon's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by danseen View Post
    Well kind of. But then according to them:

    - I deserve to be beaten up because I'm reserved
    - I am "bad" for being an atheist and that doing things most don't is "wrong"
    - I am wrong to like casual sex, and it's something "not done"
    They said you "deserved to be beaten up" ?
    Is that verbatim?

    I'm not saying I don't believe you- people can surprise you in some pretty awful ways, but I'm curious if that's your interpretation of their words or something they specifically said. They'd get int a lot of trouble if they actually said that, word for word.


    Lodge a complaint within the facility if you feel it's warranted, and then... find a new doctor?

    Sucks to share vulnerable things with someone who's paid not to be an obtuse twat to you, & have them act that way all the same.


    There are a lot of good ones out there. Don't let one bad experience ruin exploring a potentially helpful resource for you.

    Good luck.
    03/23 06:06:58 EcK: lex
    03/23 06:06:59 EcK: lex
    03/23 06:21:34 Nancynobullets: LEXXX *sacrifices a first born*
    03/23 06:21:53 Nancynobullets: We summon yooouuu
    03/23 06:29:07 Lexicon: I was sleeping!



    04/25 04:20:35 Patches: Don't listen to lex. She wants to birth a litter of kittens. She doesnt get to decide whats creepy

    02/16 23:49:38 ygolo: Lex is afk
    02/16 23:49:45 Cimarron: she's doing drugs with Jack

    03/05 19:27:41 Time: You can't make chat morbid. Lex does it naturally.

  3. #13
    Senior Member Survive & Stay Free's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by danseen View Post
    Well kind of. But then according to them:

    - I deserve to be beaten up because I'm reserved
    - I am "bad" for being an atheist and that doing things most don't is "wrong"
    - I am wrong to like casual sex, and it's something "not done"
    You're posting in this thread alone leads me to suspect there's more to this than meets the eye.

    I think there's grounds to believe, from this thread alone, that you're rationalising your behaviour, behaviour you admittedly dont want to give up or refrain from and which are being challenged by your therapist rather than validated.

    If you are supposed to be working with a therapist to overcome or change this behaviour and you are unwilling to have it challenged I'm really not sure what you will achieve. There's too much resistance for analysis, if its a depth psychologist, if its cognitive behaviour therapy, rational emotive behaviour therapy or any of the variations on those themes then there's really has to be a desire to change in the client.

    Like I say you're finding fault in the therapeutic process and your therapist but you should be looking to your self instead.

  4. #14
    Senior Member Survive & Stay Free's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lexicon View Post
    They said you "deserved to be beaten up" ?
    Is that verbatim?

    I'm not saying I don't believe you- people can surprise you in some pretty awful ways, but I'm curious if that's your interpretation of their words or something they specifically said. They'd get int a lot of trouble if they actually said that, word for word.


    Lodge a complaint within the facility if you feel it's warranted, and then... find a new doctor?

    Sucks to share vulnerable things with someone who's paid not to be an obtuse twat to you, & have them act that way all the same.


    There are a lot of good ones out there. Don't let one bad experience ruin exploring a potentially helpful resource for you.

    Good luck.
    Complaints procedures are there for a reason but going down that avenue could be a diversion or distraction from getting any work done.

    Its unclear why this person is in therapy at all, there's been nothing so far but an apparent frustration with the therapist's unwilingness to validate the client. There's more to therapy than paying someone to perform the role of a yes man. Way more.

    Like you say its possible that they just got a disappointing therapist but what would you base that conclusion on? Not anything that's come up in the thread so far, it'd be supposition and speculation.

  5. #15
    i love skylights's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by danseen View Post
    Do psychologists make sense?

    I thought the basis of treatment was they help clients on any terms they want, resource/knowledge dependent of course.

    So why do most restrict treatments at whim? I don't get it.

    Depends on who you go to. From what you've written, it doesn't sound like the ones you've had experiences with have been either ethical or helpful.

    Quote Originally Posted by danseen
    Well kind of. But then according to them:

    - I deserve to be beaten up because I'm reserved
    - I am "bad" for being an atheist and that doing things most don't is "wrong"
    - I am wrong to like casual sex, and it's something "not done"
    Are these people that have said these things accredited professionals? It's sounding more like you've been interacting with religious advisors than scientific-practitioner psychological therapists.

  6. #16
    Temporal Mechanic. Lexicon's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lark View Post
    Complaints procedures are there for a reason but going down that avenue could be a diversion or distraction from getting any work done.

    Its unclear why this person is in therapy at all, there's been nothing so far but an apparent frustration with the therapist's unwilingness to validate the client. There's more to therapy than paying someone to perform the role of a yes man. Way more.

    Like you say its possible that they just got a disappointing therapist but what would you base that conclusion on? Not anything that's come up in the thread so far, it'd be supposition and speculation.
    Of course a psych isn't supposed to be a yes-man. However, they're supposed to establish a trusting, nurturing environment.
    I know nothing about this individual's issues/situation, but if the psychologist actually told him/her (verbatim) "you deserve to be assaulted," that's a professional faux pas, potentially endangering the life of the patient, for all we know. But, like I said.. I dunno if that was just the OP's impression of what transpired, or what was actually said. If it were actually said, then I think some kind of report should be made on that particular doctor.

    If not, well.. @skylights makes a good point. It's hit or miss. Some doctors are useful, some are not, sometimes patients/doctors don't click for various reasons. Up to the patient in the end. You make valid points, as well, though. In the end it's up to the patient to be proactive about their treatment, no matter what. I don't think any of us are familiar enough with this person to really offer much more than that, in terms of conclusive information/advice.
    03/23 06:06:58 EcK: lex
    03/23 06:06:59 EcK: lex
    03/23 06:21:34 Nancynobullets: LEXXX *sacrifices a first born*
    03/23 06:21:53 Nancynobullets: We summon yooouuu
    03/23 06:29:07 Lexicon: I was sleeping!



    04/25 04:20:35 Patches: Don't listen to lex. She wants to birth a litter of kittens. She doesnt get to decide whats creepy

    02/16 23:49:38 ygolo: Lex is afk
    02/16 23:49:45 Cimarron: she's doing drugs with Jack

    03/05 19:27:41 Time: You can't make chat morbid. Lex does it naturally.

  7. #17
    Emperor/Dictator kyuuei's Avatar
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    Short answer: Absolutely I think they are worth every bit of their costs. It is an investment in the self, and I feel people spend far too little money on themselves and their own well being and happiness, supplementing it with sale items and material products.

    Psychs are like any other thing--they're assisting you in helping yourself. If you're not willing to listen to them, and give their way a shot (as clearly whatever you've been doing on your own accord is not working) then they're going to seem like total quacks to you no matter what.

    I think they serve a really great purpose. We don't just throw people into loony bins anymore. We don't think people just have nameless disorders like hysteria. They're a great buffer between yourself and your support network, and some serious issues that can really destroy your own life.

    And really, even without grave issues being present, sometimes a counselor of some sort is a great asset to a person. My parents insisted on my sister seeing one when a somewhat traumatic incident happened to her, and I feel that working through it then gave a lot of closure to the situation and it has been years without any side effects of that trauma. I think without the psych it wouldn't be like that entirely.

    To give a personal example: my sisters and I started attending a psych this past year because my two sisters were fighting like cats and dogs. They really could NOT get along, to the point where they were actually punishing their own kids over.. shit, really. Pointless shit that no one cares about or cared about then except those two at the time, and grudges held in the mean while.

    Now, the psych literally said NOTHING that I did not say to them for the past 2 years. Not a thing. The methodology she used, and the things she tried to implement.. they were precisely what I was working for and towards. The problem is that I wasn't getting through, and the counselor did. I guess hearing it from someone else that's impartial to the situation and problem really does make a lot of difference. I think it'd have been frustrating to me, only I was just happy that they were starting to get along at all. We didn't finish the counseling sessions--my free services from the army expired when I got out--but even with half-assing it the psych helped my sisters a lot, and in turn helped me a lot.

    I have had friends that just had life shit in their hands their whole lives, and they finally decided they wanted out of that situation and to improve their position.. and with the help of a counselor, even with their disagreements with his instructions and motivations and all, I think the counselor helped them pull themselves up and out of the muck. My family still asks about how they are doing, and talks about how proud they are of the work they've done.

    I know there's a lot of quacks out there.. and there are human psychs just like human doctors or lawyers--some suck, some rock, some just do their job. But I still think if you have an issue, at all, any issue.. and you truly just need some guidance, venting, perspective, and analysis, that a psych is really a huge asset. Friends and family are not trained nor are they required to have the experience nor confidentiality to deal with more serious issues. And sometimes people don't realize how deep and dug in those issues run--like in the case of my father's depression which took counselors and psychs at the VA hospital weeks to uncover because he always attributed his sleepiness, lethargy, and disinterest with his illness.

    I recommend them on the forum here a lot to people, and there's good reason for that. They truly are there to help. Sure, they need to make money too, but a good counselor is there to help you with what you need help with. They cannot do anything for you.. but they can light lanterns on your path.
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  8. #18
    Temporal Mechanic. Lexicon's Avatar
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    You guys may enjoy this short:

    03/23 06:06:58 EcK: lex
    03/23 06:06:59 EcK: lex
    03/23 06:21:34 Nancynobullets: LEXXX *sacrifices a first born*
    03/23 06:21:53 Nancynobullets: We summon yooouuu
    03/23 06:29:07 Lexicon: I was sleeping!



    04/25 04:20:35 Patches: Don't listen to lex. She wants to birth a litter of kittens. She doesnt get to decide whats creepy

    02/16 23:49:38 ygolo: Lex is afk
    02/16 23:49:45 Cimarron: she's doing drugs with Jack

    03/05 19:27:41 Time: You can't make chat morbid. Lex does it naturally.

  9. #19
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    No.

  10. #20
    Senior Member danseen's Avatar
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    Ok so i ds

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