WHat can I do about rage?

[Julius_Van_Der_Beak]

It might not. It didn't happen to me the handful of times I've done it.

I've tried it though... sometimes it made me feel good, sometimes it made me paranoid. I think at work it would make me paranoid.

 

[greenfairy]

I've tried it though... sometimes it made me feel good, sometimes it made me paranoid. I think at work it would make me paranoid.

Well, that might not be good. You're right.

Umm...kundalini yoga is good! I've gone to a few classes and it makes me feel awesome. If you do a set that is physically demanding it just makes everything go out of your mind.

 

[Julius_Van_Der_Beak]

Well, that might not be good. You're right.

Umm...kundalini yoga is good! I've gone to a few classes and it makes me feel awesome. If you do a set that is physically demanding it just makes everything go out of your mind.

My friends said exercise too. I'll go with that.

 

[Julius_Van_Der_Beak]

Well, that might not be good. You're right.

Umm...kundalini yoga is good! I've gone to a few classes and it makes me feel awesome. If you do a set that is physically demanding it just makes everything go out of your mind.

My friends said exercise too. I'll go with that. Exercise is probably a good idea anyway. I think the key thing is something physically demanding, probably.

 

[ndovjtjcaqidthi]

Just like... I can't solve these kinds of problems and manage people's feelings at the same time. And nobody cares that I do the former. People make more stupid, careless mistakes, but they never get reprimanded, because they can control their rage better. Actually, I was cleaning up after someone like that when I got dumped call, and the person on the other line.. I'm doing that constantly, and I have to deal with that, and if my tone is wrong, while cleaning up after someone else's mistake, I get reprimanded. But the person in question gets rewarded for doing and gets achievement awards because they're a "positive influence."

I have to massage the egos of overly chipper mid-western ladies day in and day out, and it gets exhausting.

Customers are ok, I guess. I'm used to them being crazy and clueless. Most of them leave it at that and are content to let me fix things. Other emplyees though, ask me questions, then feel defensive about not-understanding things or realizing they made a mistake. Half the time there's a customer-waiting on the line, and I have to be soothing for them. I can only take so much of this. I have to provide explanations only to be told "Oh, I'm not a technical person. I'm going to bring the customer on." I tried to get the customer on my line before... but they want to drag it out, and they never understand anyway. It's not even like my explanations are that technical. I don't use jargon to sound more impressive.

You already know this, but you need a change of scenery.

And about pot, lol, I was only being half-serious before when I said "Do it pussy". But now you have me curious. The last time you tried it, were you comfortable with your surroundings? How much did you smoke? Your set/setting has a lot to do with how you'll react to things like that.

Maybe if you did it by yourself and only had a bit, you'd have a better experience. It couldn't hurt.

And yes, exercise is a good idea too.

 

[Julius_Van_Der_Beak]

You already know this, but you need a change of scenery.

Yeah. What the fuck am I doing talking to customers and overly cheery midwestern ladies?


California, feeling isolated because everyone else in the volunteer program I was in was hooking up and I wasn't. Not to mention the fact that I had to deal with their relationship drama constantly spilling over into my life. And nobody wanted to hang out with me because they were too busy hanging out with whoever they were fucking at the time. And I was still a damn virgin (I'm not anymore, if you're wondering).

I guess I have a good memory from then of listening to music and hearing lots of details, but otherwise, it does not have positive associations.

Everyone told me in my late teens that it would improve my life, and that was the first time I had it, and I did it a number of times... probably not more than 20. It didn't improve my life though.

 

[greenfairy]

My friends said exercise too. I'll go with that. Exercise is probably a good idea anyway. I think the key thing is something physically demanding, probably.

Yeah. Emotions are energy which builds up and needs expression. Burning off the excess energy helps clear the perspective to neutrally assess the situation.

 

[Julius_Van_Der_Beak]

Yeah. Emotions are energy which builds up and needs expression. Burning off the excess energy helps clear the perspective to neutrally assess the situation.

journal writing sometimes helps, too.

 

[ndovjtjcaqidthi]

Yeah. What the fuck am I doing talking to customers and overly cheery midwestern ladies?

Yeah, what the fuck man? Srs.

California, feeling isolated because everyone else in the volunteer program I was in was hooking up and I wasn't. Not to mention the fact that I had to deal with their relationship drama constantly spilling over into my life. And nobody wanted to hang out with me because they were too busy hanging out with whoever they were fucking at the time.

"If you french fry when you're supposed to pizza you're gonna have a bad time".

And I was still a damn virgin (I'm not anymore, if you're wondering).

Mah man.

I guess I have a good memory from then of listening to music and hearing lots of details, but otherwise, it does not have positive associations.

Then you know what you must now do.

 

[Julius_Van_Der_Beak]

Then you know what you must now do.

Listen to music? With or without pot? You're probably not going to get me to touch the stuff again. It didn't do for me what everyone was telling me it would. I didn't see new spiritual connections, get a more relaxed outlook on life, it didn't help me get laid, and it didn't give me a sense of humor. The only good thing was an intense engagement with sensory phenomenon I often shut out, like food and music. But sometimes I can get something similar without the weed.

I know it's a classic story, the IxTX learns to smoke weed or break the rules or some shit and then encounters growth, but I already did that in my early twenties, and it was lame. I just kind of wasted my precious time. What was I supposed to learn from that? How was that supposed to work?

I don't even think I'm ranting about the same thing anymore.

 

[Julius_Van_Der_Beak]

I really am angry about a lot of things. Maybe I should write them all down somewhere. Not here, though.

 

[ndovjtjcaqidthi]

Hmm. Sorry for hijacking your thread, I'm totally *not* trying to pressure you into smoking. I just get the feeling that you haven't been properly introduced to it yet. No worries, though. I'd just be very interested in hearing what you thought about a proper experience.

And also [MENTION=4660]msg_v2[/MENTION], feel free to vent to me if you ever feel the need to. (Just saying).

 

[Julius_Van_Der_Beak]

Hmm. Sorry for hijacking your thread, I'm totally *not* trying to pressure you into smoking. I just get the feeling that you haven't been properly introduced to it yet. No worries, though. I'd just be very interested in hearing what you thought about a proper experience.

And also [MENTION=4660]msg_v2[/MENTION], feel free to vent to me if you ever feel the need to. (Just saying).

I do need to get a lot of things off my chest, bad memories, feelings of betrayel, etc. I might prefer to do that silently, though, with a journal. I think it helps if I don't have to soften my words.

But thanks for the offer. I do wonder, though... what is that suppose to do for me.... see, part of the problem is I have bad vibes anyway. If bad vibes doesn't make for a good experience, smoking isn't going to get rid of the bad vibes. I actually have found two or three things I could do in this thread, though.

 

[Lady_X]

the most anger that i've witnessed in other people seems to come from expectations of other people. the expectation that one might answer you in a certain way, or ask something in a certain way etc etc

my best advice is to let it go

realize everyone is just operating in the best way they know how and are not out to get you, they are not trying to piss you off and it's likely not just them being inconsiderate.

also realize...being wrong doesn't make someone an asshole.

so when you find yourself feeling angry...be your own therapist.

ask why.

take it as a challenge to learn compassion and patience.

and silently thank them for the lesson.

 

[ndovjtjcaqidthi]

I do need to get a lot of things off my chest, bad memories, feelings of betrayel, etc. I might prefer to do that silently, though, with a journal. I think it helps if I don't have to soften my words.

Try whatever you think will help. It's not good to carry those feels around with you, especially with that extra stress your job brings. It could easily lead to a breakdown of sorts.

 

[Lady_X]

yeah just read your last comment about being angry about a lot of things.

sounds like you need some good screaming out in the wilderness therapy. i've never done this but it seems like a good idea.

 

[Cellmold]

I do need to get a lot of things off my chest, bad memories, feelings of betrayel, etc. I might prefer to do that silently, though, with a journal. I think it helps if I don't have to soften my words.

But thanks for the offer. I do wonder, though... what is that suppose to do for me.... see, part of the problem is I have bad vibes anyway. If bad vibes doesn't make for a good experience, smoking isn't going to get rid of the bad vibes. I actually have found two or three things I could do in this thread, though.

Read my blog, that would enrage anyone.

Then you will have the fire to write it out in the open. I tend to do that in my blog and whatever people think of me, at least it is there, even if I haven't got round to verbally telling it yet.

 

[RDF]

Go to www.amazon.com and do a search on "anger management."

There's a whole counseling/self-help industry out there that deals with exactly your problem. So do some reading and learn some new skills, as opposed to running from your problems.

 

[Betty Blue]

Take deep long breaths when you feel rage coming on. If it's directly related to your interactions wth other employees/supervisors then prepare yourself.

Breathing in long slow breaths and breathing out long but slightly faster breaths slows down the brain which gives you time to think/de-rage before reacting. You can breath in to the count of fifteen and out to the count of ten, you can do it inaudibly so it's not noticed.

It actually works. It's free. It's worth a shot.

Just skimmed this site, looks a bit ...twee or something but have a look anyway.

http://www.calmclinic.com/anxiety/symptoms/anger

 

[Julius_Van_Der_Beak]

Today, after every call, I've been writing down everything that annoy me, no matter how petty. Interestingly, this makes me less annoyed afterwards.