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Do IEI's like to be chased?

Azure Flame

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So, do IEI's like to be chased?

If so, how does this manifest? In my experience with them, they'll post songs about you on their facebook wall and give all sorts of "hints" which stimulates my SLE stalker/detective instinct where I start overanalyzing everything they do, lol. I've also had IEI's give me the cold shoulder at school, completely ignore me until I grab them by the arm and make a joke and they blush like crazy and start giggling. However, I don't really know how it works online. There's only so much chase one can do before looking like a desperate punta or a psychopath.

Thoughts? How does their "victim" erotic attitude manifest?
 

Amargith

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I tend to prod the guy I'm curious about with light banter. Then wait to see if he comes looking for me. I'll do this up to three times. After that, I usually move on, unless he suddenly takes initiative all on his own. If he engages, the banter games can begin :D

Edit: Online, I tend to use reps, VMs and banter in the same way I do irl really. Ive found most just suddenly single me out for a PM on the forum or on ventrillo with KGB-style questions and interrogation tactics :laugh:

If we click, I'll be open to and focused on him whenever he engages me from then on, in an attempt to flex to his needs. I'll start making inside jokes to draw his attention or turn his head in public (it makes me feel more bonded with those I care for).

For me, this is both the start for potential for more romantically (if im single) or a great friendship (if Im taken or it is a girl).

Ive also found that with ILIs (which I tend to click with well as well), I need to be more aggressive in seeking them out as they enjoy that, whereas with SLEs I need to be more demure and let them take charge, as they will be turned off by what they seem to consider 'controlling the interaction'. It seems to be important to them to be the one to decide when the interaction begins and ends, so just being present and attentive without actually focusing on them seems to go over better.

Online, I tend to use reps, VMs and banter in the same way I do irl really.
 
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mintleaf

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well, I'm an IEI, and I think being chased is kind of flattering. it depends on how I feel about the pursuer, obviously.

I would never act like the IEIs you've mentioned, though. I don't encourage chasing, or at least don't go any farther than being stand-offish or purposefully sending out extremely subtle mixed signals. My answer might be irrelevant, though, I've never been chased by anyone I was seriously interested in. I would definitely be more straightforward otherwise.

I've also had IEI's give me the cold shoulder at school, completely ignore me until I grab them by the arm and make a joke and they blush like crazy and start giggling. However, I don't really know how it works online. There's only so much chase one can do before looking like a desperate punta or a psychopath.

I would blush and laugh too, regardless of my interest in the person. It's just a natural reflex. I've heard similar things said about IEIs in general: "They often have a very noticeable shy grin that appears when they worried or excited, or when someone focuses other's attention on them." (socionics.com)
 
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Depends on your gender of preference.
 

chickpea

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yes, i like being chased but i'd like to think i'm a little more slick than what you've described. i don't really remember what dating is like though because i've been in a relationship too long lol. i do remember flat out saying to my bf when we were first dating "you can call me if you want to hang out because i'm not going to chase you."
 

Amargith

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yes, i like being chased but i'd like to think i'm a little more slick than what you've described. i don't really remember what dating is like though because i've been in a relationship too long lol. i do remember flat out saying to my bf when we were first dating "you can call me if you want to hang out because i'm not going to chase you."

:yes:
 

Kierva

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What I don't understand is WHY they want to be chased.

The catch-me-if-you-can/hot-and-cold game gets really, really old... and I wonder how I have the energy to put up with this.

Hope, perhaps?
 

digesthisickness

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How does one find out if they're an ILE, EPP, SOS, XXX, ETC.?
 

Amargith

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:shrug: Why is it SLEs want to chase? (and for that matter get turned of by being chased themselves, ime)

I prefer people engage me - even with friends and acquaintances. That way I know that Im not bothering them (and I dont mind being bothered), and they actually *want* to be near me. I enjoy pleasing people so if being near me pleases them, it works for both of us. I also enjoy the time that the chase takes place to gauge who the person is, see their actions, understand what makes him tick. Make sure we're compatible etc. And for that matter...give them the time to do the same, coz no offense - SLEs tend to not bother thinking about this shit unless they are forced to in order to get what they want. And I kind of want them to know for sure that I'm what they want.
 

Kierva

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:shrug: Why is it SLEs want to chase? (and for that matter get turned of by being chased themselves, ime)

I prefer people engage me - even with friends and acquaintances. That way I know that Im not bothering them (and I dont mind being bothered), and they actually *want* to be near me. I enjoy pleasing people so if being near me pleases them, it works for both of us. I also enjoy the time that the chase takes place to gauge who the person is, see their actions, understand what makes him tick. Make sure we're compatible etc. And for that matter...give them the time to do the same, coz no offense - SLEs tend to not bother thinking about this shit unless they are forced to in order to get what they want. And I kind of want them to know for sure that I'm what they want.

Well I don't know about other SLEs, but for me when someone approaches me I get very suspicious. My Fi PoLR would act up and my head goes "What the hell does he want from me?". To chase others is a way of being sure of your agenda, and when I chase I make sure my agenda gets set out VERY CLEARLY to the other person.
 

Amargith

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Well I don't know about other SLEs, but for me when someone approaches me I get very suspicious. My Fi PoLR would act up and my head goes "What the hell does he want from me?". To chase others is a way of being sure of your agenda, and when I chase I make sure my agenda gets set out VERY CLEARLY to the other person.

:laugh: Yeah, to the point where you'll rebel against the attention and potential for control from that person that you seem to perceive. Otoh, I enjoy forming bonds with people. Im always open to that, so to be approached is a new opportunity for something beautiful imho :)
 

Kierva

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:laugh: Yeah, to the point where you'll rebel against the attention and potential for control from that person that you seem to perceive. Otoh, I enjoy forming bonds with people. Im always open to that, so to be approached is a new opportunity for something beautiful imho :)

lol lol lol

#guiltyascharged
 

Amargith

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Meanwhile your clear chase takes away any insecurity we might have as to bothering you, or somehow wasting our time with you. Dont forget you guys do the action oriented shit that we just...aren't that comfortable with. Chasing after someone can feel a bit daunting as it requires direct action and working towards a goal.
 

PeaceBaby

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It depends on who's doing the chasing. ;)

I don't expect a chase so much as persistence and determination - I'm worth winning and I want to know my chosen one is up for the challenge.
 

Azure Flame

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"I want to make sure I'm the one they really want."

I guess that makes sense. It doesn't make sense in the online arena when you're trying to get to know someone and keep asking them out for coffee and they stop responding then you just start talking again a few days later.

I agree with vetani, that makes me feel better. When someone approaches me my initial question is, "What do they want from me?" The reason being, 10% of people I speak to actually give a shit about me and would rather just talk to me because I'm attractive and they want immediate sex, or they're trolling me, or I have something they want. Very few people actually come up to me like, "Oh, so I see you like sci fi fantasy and gymnastics? I'm a huge fantasy and gymnastics fan! Lets go talk about it!"

Or they come up to me because of leadership/confidence reasons. Being viewed as a leader is nice and all, but its annoying feeling responsible for the self confidence of random fucking strangers.
 

Amargith

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Well, that seems like a subtle hint where they aint ready yet for an irl confrontation (for whatever reason) and first wanna gather data talking to you here some more.
 

Azure Flame

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[MENTION=5494]Amargith[/MENTION]
she keep saying, "I love hiking. Its time to go to the mountains!"

If anything it sounds like she's trying to say "ask me out on a hike."

I remember meeting an IEI waitress once, after every activity I mentioned in our conversation she'd respond with, "oo That sounds fun."
 

Amargith

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[MENTION=5494]Amargith[/MENTION]
she keep saying, "I love hiking. Its time for to go to the mountains!"

If anything it sounds like she's trying to say "ask me out on a hike"

:D Maybe she doesnt like coffee? Ask her where she'd like to go, then arrange it ;)

Edit: and yes, anything is fun when you get to do it with a person you are very interested in. We're flexible that way :alttongue:
 

Azure Flame

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This is gay. Bitch is gonna learn some directness when she speaks to me.
 

Amargith

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This is gay. Bitch is gonna learn some directness when she speaks to me.

Lol. You do realize that the very reason you are into us in the first place is coz we *do not* do directness, right? Any directness is considered either an attack or an attempt to usurp you of your power :p
 
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