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  1. #1
    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
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    Default Beauty: A Curse, A Blessing or Just an Asset?

    The answer is quite simple. Beauty is an asset, just like physical prowess, charisma, brains or emotional intelligence. The key with any gift is in the way that you use it. It doesn’t define you as a person. Rather, it’s an asset to be used judiciously and with an understanding of how it is just a small part of who you are. Those that get this will do well; others that don’t, not so much.
    As Penelope Lively said, "I'm intrigued by the way in which physical appearance can often direct a person's life; things happen differently for a beautiful woman than for a plain one." Different yes, but not necessarily better. So, the next time you see a stunningly beautiful woman,.... enjoy the view, but don't judge her because she's beautiful.
    Interesting side note:

    (A side note about beauty is that weight isn't much of a factor, unless the person is morbidly obese or anorexically skinny. The key to perceived beauty is the face.)
    Full article here: read article

    Thoughts?
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  2. #2
    Senior Member Scott N Denver's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Amargith View Post
    Interesting side note:



    Full article here: read article

    Thoughts?
    Interesting article.

    That British lady a few months back sure stirred an anthill when she wrote her article about "how difficult it is being beautiful."

  3. #3
    Administrator highlander's Avatar
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    I think people who are attractive do have advantages and more choices in life. They have more choices when it comes to love. They have an advantage in their careers. Even babys smile at them more. You could say being rich has its disadvantages too but all in all, most would rather be rich than poor. It's easier.

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    actinomycetes raindancing's Avatar
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    This article could be based on my sister.
    How some beautiful women view themselves can border on obsessive.
    Low self esteem is more common in beautiful women than you would expect. Some just don’t believe they are attractive. They have a distorted self image and don’t believe others who tell them how stunning they are. Thus in their mind everyone is a “liar” and not to be trusted. Some are dependent on the first impression reaction of others to define who they are, ie someone who has it all because of her beauty. So, she starts to see herself as someone with no talent, no intellect -- no redeeming qualities other than her looks.
    Absolutely.
    I never know how much of the 'I'm so fat, I'm so ugly' is a play for attention or how she genuinely feels, but either is rooted in self esteem issues... it isn't endearing, not when she's prettier than the people she's complaining to. And she doesn't believe people when they tell her otherwise. It's all about comparison. And she's not comparing herself to the people she knows, she's comparing to models and celebrities. And she knows she's not as attractive as those ideals so anything people say to the contrary is rejected.
    All her life she's been told how beautiful she is. Not how smart or funny or athletic, even though she is all of those things too.
    If she doesn't feel beautiful, she feels like shit. So there is no expense or effort spared.

    If she's beautiful, a new study says, there is often a hidden selfish streak.
    An almost unconscious sense of entitlement.

    Probably the most difficult thing a beautiful woman has to deal with is social rejection. When it comes to members of her own sex she is often an outcast
    My sister certainly feels this way, even when it's not the reality. She also struggles a little with the different interactions between men and women. With men, she is comfortable. Has total control, could get away with murder. But with women she suddenly has this power taken from her.
    “Can a man of perception respect himself at all?”
    ― Fyodor Dostoyevsky

  5. #5
    Glycerine
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    I am always curious if they do it to fish for compliments or if they are really that insecure?

  6. #6
    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
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    They really are that insecure and fish for compliments as a band-aid for that constant insecurity.
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  7. #7

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    I think the hidden premise to all this is that there is some objective measure of beauty.

    Isn't beauty in the eye of the beholder?

    Accept the past. Live for the present. Look forward to the future.
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  8. #8
    Was E.laur Laurie's Avatar
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    Also if you are told you are beautiful when you are growing up you don't know how to actually judge it as a child. At least with intelligence we have something to pretend to gauge it by. So it makes sense that a kid could grow up thinking beauty was very unique when it's actually not.

  9. #9
    Glycerine
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    @ygolo: Symmetry, proportion and contrast, indicators of youthfulness (neoteny) are the objective measures but how it's presented and what's considered the best presentation is the subjective part.

    @Amargith: yikes.

  10. #10
    actinomycetes raindancing's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Glycerine View Post
    I am always curious if they do it to fish for compliments or if they are really that insecure?
    I don't know... I think it's both. At least with my sister. When someone says she's beautiful it makes her feel good, she likes feeling good... Maybe something to do with her identity being so based on what other people think?
    If it's been a period of time since the last compliment, maybe she starts to feel uncertain?

    She can go from feeling great about herself, beautiful and confident, to seeing a picture of someone she thinks is more attractive and instantly become depressed that she'll never be as 'good' as that. Or she might redouble her efforts to be perfect. Hit the gym, diet, buy more clothes. A lot of insecurity.

    It makes me very glad I didn't have people telling me I was attractive when I was younger... such a strange thing to praise someone for.
    “Can a man of perception respect himself at all?”
    ― Fyodor Dostoyevsky

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