If you really believe it doesn't exist, then perhaps I can address the concern. But, I think, like most people you will react badly if strongly restricted from being your true self.
It is an ill defined concept, as are basically all concepts that describe reality. But that does not negate the existence of the thing we are trying to capture in the conceptualization.
People can deny the existence of the real world along similar lines. But They will still avoid being hit by a bus when they see it coming. The point is moot. No-one actually behaves like they believe these types of things.