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  1. #11
    Analytical Dreamer Coriolis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by FineLine View Post
    Take the example of a house:

    I bought a little cottage on the lake. I would have preferred something bigger, but it was the only decent house in my price range. It is what it is. I guess I’ll just have to accept it as it is.

    But because I saved money on the purchase, I have some money left over to at least make some improvements. I think I’ll have the bathroom remodeled.
    I also like the example of a job. I don't refuse to do my current job or to cash my paychecks because I hope to get a better job with a higher salary in another year or two.

    The balance is accepting who you are today, while becoming a better you for tomorrow. A big part of this self-acceptance is accepting your past since, however you feel about it, there is no way you can change it. You can only change from today forward. It's when you won't change what you can change that you have given up.
    I've been called a criminal, a terrorist, and a threat to the known universe. But everything you were told is a lie. The truth is, they've taken our freedom, our home, and our future. The time has come for all humanity to take a stand...

  2. #12
    this is my winter song EJCC's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by wolfy View Post
    It is like blame and responsibility. Responsibility looks forward and blame looks back. In the same vein, accepting who you are is honest evaluation, self improvement looks forward to who you could become.
    ^ This.

    I would also add that sometimes what you might initially see as a curse is actually a blessing. There comes a point, after realizing what your flaws are, when you realize that some of them are actually things that you personally value, and that you take pride in (in moderation). For example, if you're brutally honest, you may want to rein yourself in a little to avoid offending people, but if you stopped telling it like you see it, that would be sad, and you would probably hate it.
    ~ g e t f e s t i v e ! ~


    EJCC: "The Big Questions in my life right now: 1) What am I willing to live with? 2) What do I have to live with? 3) What can I change for the better?"
    Coriolis: "Is that the ESTJ Serenity Prayer?"



    ESTJ - LSE - ESTj (mbti/socionics)
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    want to ask me something? go for it!

  3. #13
    Senior Member INTP's Avatar
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    accepting your flaws doesent mean that you cant work on them.
    "Where wisdom reigns, there is no conflict between thinking and feeling."
    — C.G. Jung

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  4. #14
    actinomycetes raindancing's Avatar
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    How can you decide what you want to improve or change if you don't have an honest view of yourself?
    “Can a man of perception respect himself at all?”
    ― Fyodor Dostoyevsky

  5. #15
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    A mentality of "Everyone's fucked up in some way, and we all manage to get by. So, flaws ain't so bad."

    It's trite but true, and it's easier and easier to internalize over time.

    Your boss lets stress get to him and lashes out at people. People walking down the street are insecure and think that you and others are actually paying attention to them. Your parents aren't as all-knowing as you once thought. .. so on and so forth.

  6. #16
    Senior Member INTP's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by raindancing View Post
    How can you decide what you want to improve or change if you don't have an honest view of yourself?
    introspect and listen to the feedback you get from external world, but dont think the feedback is the ultimate truth, since people dont know always whats the reason behind your actions etc. so their view on you is flawed. knowing this, you should only use the feedback as comparison and guide on your introspection.
    "Where wisdom reigns, there is no conflict between thinking and feeling."
    — C.G. Jung

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  7. #17
    Dreaming the life onemoretime's Avatar
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    Seems like it's all about the mindset. You start by accepting yourself for who you are. Then, you set goals for yourself, with specific time limits. If you accomplish those goals in that time period, then that's fantastic. If you don't, then just modify the time period. If you get to the point that you no longer think it's worth the effort, then don't do it anymore. At no point during this process, though, does your accomplishment or non-accomplishment have any bearing on your self-worth. It's just something you're doing.

  8. #18
    actinomycetes raindancing's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by INTP View Post
    introspect and listen to the feedback you get from external world, but dont think the feedback is the ultimate truth, since people dont know always whats the reason behind your actions etc. so their view on you is flawed. knowing this, you should only use the feedback as comparison and guide on your introspection.
    Exactly, exactly. And don't think you know the ultimate truth either. (Question, strive, analyze. At least that's what I do. )
    “Can a man of perception respect himself at all?”
    ― Fyodor Dostoyevsky

  9. #19
    Senior Member INTP's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by raindancing View Post
    Exactly, exactly. And don't think you know the ultimate truth either. (Question, strive, analyze. At least that's what I do. )
    well, i dont think you need to know the ultimate truth(as in analyzed thoroughly by INTP standards) to notice stuff like you tend to start arguing too easily or correct people too much. oh and dream analyzing can be really helpful thing as part of the introspection
    "Where wisdom reigns, there is no conflict between thinking and feeling."
    — C.G. Jung

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  10. #20
    actinomycetes raindancing's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by INTP View Post
    well, i dont think you need to know the ultimate truth(as in analyzed thoroughly by INTP standards) to notice stuff like you tend to start arguing too easily or correct people too much. oh and dream analyzing can be really helpful thing as part of the introspection
    I don't know if it would be even possible to know the ultimate truth... or even if you did, how would you know you know it?
    Did I just claim there was an ultimate truth?

    I don't know about need. I am thinking about intellectual honesty. "a virtuous disposition to eschew deception when given an incentive for deception."
    Self deception, in this instance. In many ways, the most tempting thing.
    Perhaps to me this is a need. Not much makes me more sick than to find I've been laboring under self deception.

    I have only tried dream analyzing in a very superficial way, but it is intriguing. Are there any resources you'd recommend?
    “Can a man of perception respect himself at all?”
    ― Fyodor Dostoyevsky

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