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  1. #41
    Fabula rasa Kas's Avatar
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    I'm not myself among people I don't know well. I listen and watch more. I think in military it's called reconnaissance.
    “The world is full of obvious things which nobody by any chance ever observes." A.C. Doyle

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  2. #42
    not to be trusted miss fortune's Avatar
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    I have given people the advice on job interviews before of DON'T be yourself! Be who they want for you to be!

    Of course I fail at that and suck at job interviews by being COMPLETELY honest when it's a bad idea to do so (i.e. why were you fired from that job? for dating my boss... but that's ok, we're still together even if he DID fire me!)

    I'm pretty much myself all of the time... if I feel like talking about ancient burial practices or expressing myself almost entirely through body language I do so... I find that this keeps people on their toes which pleases me in some perverse manner I also dress how I feel like even if it might not be anything like what anyone else is wearing because I'd rather be comfortable than fashionable
    “Oh, we're always alright. You remember that. We happen to other people.” -Terry Pratchett
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  3. #43
    Senior Member Jaguar's Avatar
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    Make life easier? Me?

  4. #44
    Entertaining Cracker five sounds's Avatar
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    I keep my random thought firing under control. I try not to get too hammy.

    I also try to keep my righteous rants down.
    You hem me in -- behind and before;
    you have laid your hand upon me.
    Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
    too lofty for me to attain.
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  5. #45
    Symbolic Herald Vasilisa's Avatar
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    Default straight toward the bonfire

    Because–isn’t it drilled into us constantly, from childhood on, an unquestioned platitude in the culture–? From William Blake to Lady Gaga, from Rousseau to Rumi to Tosca to Mister Rogers, it’s a curiously uniform message, accepted from high to low: when in doubt, what to do? How do we know what’s right for us? Every shrink, every career counselor, every Disney princess knows the answer: “Be yourself.” “Follow your heart.” Only here’s what I really, really want someone to explain to me. What if one happens to be possessed of a heart that can’t be trusted–? What if the heart, for its own unfathomable reasons, leads one willfully and in a cloud of unspeakable radiance away from health, domesticity, civic responsibility and strong social connections and all the blandly-held common virtues and instead straight toward a beautiful flare of ruin, self-immolation, disaster?…If your deepest self is singing and coaxing you straight toward the bonfire, is it better to turn away? Stop your ears with wax? Ignore all the perverse glory your heart is screaming at you? Set yourself on the course that will lead you dutifully towards the norm, reasonable hours and regular medical check-ups, stable relationships and steady career advancement, the New York Times and brunch on Sunday, all with the promise of being somehow a better person? Or…is it better to throw yourself head first and laughing into the holy rage calling your name?

    Donna Tartt, The Goldfinch
    the formless thing which gives things form!
    Found Forum Haiku Project


    Positive Spin | your feedback welcomed | Darker Criticism

  6. #46
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    "Just be yourself" is often misinterpreted to mean "I'm fine the way I am". But if that was really true, then surely you would be happy?

    What it really should be interpreted as is "Be the best you can be". Self-improvement doesn't require you to sacrifice your identity. This is one of the main excuses people use to avoid changing an unhealthy lifestyle, or challenging a false belief.
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  7. #47
    Theta Male Julius_Van_Der_Beak's Avatar
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    [Trump's] rhetoric is not an abuse of power. In the same way that it's also not against the law to do a backflip off of the roof of your house onto your concrete driveway. It's just mind-numbingly stupid and, to say the least, counterproductive. - Bush did 9-11


    This is not going to go the way you think....

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  8. #48
    metamorphosing Flâneuse's Avatar
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    The vast majority of the time I don't show my true self unless I think there's a good chance I'm going to be accepted and understood. As reticent as I am to express my thoughts at times, in real life expressing my emotions is even more difficult and makes me feel vulnerable. The positive side to having so much emotional restraint is that I'm rarely unkind or hostile to people, even when I feel angry and annoyed inside. (I rarely take my anger out on people who don't deserve it, and if the person is actually doing something that warrants my anger, I can usually ask them to stop without blowing up.) The downside is that it's hard to show genuine warmth and connect with people, as well. I do, however, have occasional moments where I feel the urge to express myself in an unfiltered way, and how people receive it is an afterthought.

    In a nutshell, I believe filters are a great thing in moderation; they can keep you from acting like an asshole and can protect your inner self from people who wouldn't respect it. Different levels of filtering are right for different personalities - some people are naturally very unfiltered without being abrasive, and others are naturally much more reserved, and there's nothing wrong with either one. I think getting a feel for others first and gradually opening up as you start to trust them more is a good idea if you're very shy and sensitive. However, I also think the world would be a dull place if not for those brave souls who aren't afraid to openly let their freak flags fly and can easily disregard others' judgmental opinions.
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  9. #49
    The Typing Tabby grey_beard's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Vasilisa View Post
    Because–isn’t it drilled into us constantly, from childhood on, an unquestioned platitude in the culture–? From William Blake to Lady Gaga, from Rousseau to Rumi to Tosca to Mister Rogers, it’s a curiously uniform message, accepted from high to low: when in doubt, what to do? How do we know what’s right for us? Every shrink, every career counselor, every Disney princess knows the answer: “Be yourself.” “Follow your heart.” Only here’s what I really, really want someone to explain to me. What if one happens to be possessed of a heart that can’t be trusted–? What if the heart, for its own unfathomable reasons, leads one willfully and in a cloud of unspeakable radiance away from health, domesticity, civic responsibility and strong social connections and all the blandly-held common virtues and instead straight toward a beautiful flare of ruin, self-immolation, disaster?…If your deepest self is singing and coaxing you straight toward the bonfire, is it better to turn away? Stop your ears with wax? Ignore all the perverse glory your heart is screaming at you? Set yourself on the course that will lead you dutifully towards the norm, reasonable hours and regular medical check-ups, stable relationships and steady career advancement, the New York Times and brunch on Sunday, all with the promise of being somehow a better person? Or…is it better to throw yourself head first and laughing into the holy rage calling your name?

    Donna Tartt, The Goldfinch
    "Well," he said thoughtfully, "I suppose one could compromise by circling the bowl a few times on the way down."
    "Love never needs time. But friendship always needs time. More and more and more time, up to long past midnight." -- The Crime of Captain Gahagan

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  10. #50
    A wannabe dog
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    Quote Originally Posted by Qlip View Post
    Be yourself. This is common advice. Maybe it's because everybody is really a shining jewel deep down inside. Or maybe because it's really not worth the effort to work against yourself.

    But, what I want to hear is when you're not yourself. What are those subjects that you're interested in that you've decided just creeps everybody out, or bores them? What is that thing you want to wear that your friends have expressedly told you not to? What have you changed about yourself to make life easier?
    Lol I remembered when I used to believe in the Buddhism religion back then I would often collect a bunch of cards that have quotes and poems that are related to things like karma, past lives etc. When I showed my friend those stuff, she freaked out at me and told me to keep those stuff away from her.

    Then I have another friend, she says my biggest flaw is that I love talking too much about astrology.

    I also happened to be interested in things like mummies, taxidermy, and I also have a deep interest in psychology and would often spend hours researching and watching documentaries about serial killers and mentally ill people because I'm curious what makes them tick.


    These are just some bizarre hobbies of mine, which I've learnt not to discuss with people around me because nobody around me understands it.

    Everybody are into things that are normal, but not everybody has the patience for things that are out of the ordinary. They would freak out and look at you as if you were some weirdo, so I guessed there are some things that one should just keep to ourselves.

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