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Do people not have the ability to remember other people as well as some people do?

xisnotx

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Typically, I can remember most people who I have been introduced to, or interacted with, in a way that indicates to me that we are "more than just strangers". I'm not good with names (not bad with them..) but I typically can remember peoples faces...where I saw that face before...etc etc.

I go to an isolated campus with 20k or so students. I would say that out of every 15-20 random faces, I can recognize at least one face..and realize why I recognize it (Where I saw them..or see them frequently) That is just over 1000 people..or faces, that I have "profiled".

Out of these 1000 faces..I only know like maybe 10 of them intimately enough to actually go up to talk to. (A limitation I put on myself lol)

But I "know" 990 other faces.

What I find funny is every time I see one of the 990 faces..I try to make eye contact, and they typically don't comply. For example..a friend of mine once briefly introduced me to a piano major..and she played the piano for us once (around 8 months ago). It was the only time I've ever interacted with her (and it was like maybe 10 minutes of total reaction)...and I just saw her again...and I tried to make eye contact with her..and nothing..

I've always just assumed that people like that were just too busy to look up and see my face, that if she were to look up she would instantly remember me..but maybe, she actually doesn't remember me..or isn't consciously aware that she has interacted with me before.

Is it possible that some people can't remember having talked to you, even if briefly, a couple months/years ago?

To me, that seems strange...how could you forget?

(Or perhaps they just don't want to talk to me...so they pretend not to see me, when they do...I hope people aren't that mean lol)
 

Tiger Owl

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And who are you again?

Seriously, I know what you are talking about. I don't forget faces or events but I am terrible with names. I always try to make eye contact and say hello to people I know I have met in the past (unless I would rather I stay forgotten).
 

Tiltyred

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It's extremely possible. I have been on both ends of the experience. It's helpful sometimes if you just say hi, you played the piano for me once, nice to see you, rather than just look and say nothing. When the other person sees you outside of the context of the situation when you met, in different clothes, different circumstances, sometimes it's hard to make the connection.
 

Jaq

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I can recognize your face, it's just I might forget your name if I don't deem you as interesting/useful/important
true chiz guys ^
 
D

Dali

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Terrible with names and terrible with faces.

It's all about context for me when it comes to those two (when it comes to acquaintances). Anthony from my floor at the office building, who I run into and nod at every other weekday could be very easily ignored and go 'unrecognised' should I run into him at the club/mall/etc. Anthony would recognise me and walk over to say hi and I'd know that I knew him but, more often than not, I wouldn't be able to place where I knew him from and how I did. I've lost count of the number of times I've bs'd my way through entire conversations with people, never knowing 'who' they were.


EDIT: And just noticed that [MENTION=7063]SilkRoad[/MENTION] mentioned the context bit in-between the time I clicked on the thread & posted.
 

SilkRoad

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Terrible with names and terrible with faces.

It's all about context for me when it comes to those two (when it comes to acquaintances). Anthony from my floor at the office building, who I run into and nod at every other weekday could be very easily ignored and go 'unrecognised' should I run into him at the club/mall/etc. Anthony would recognise me and walk over to say hi and I'd know that I knew him but, more often than not, I wouldn't be able to place where I knew him from and how I did. I've lost count of the number of times I've bs'd my way through entire conversations with people, never knowing 'who' they were.


EDIT: And just noticed that [MENTION=7063]SilkRoad[/MENTION] mentioned the context bit in-between the time I clicked on the thread & posted.

I think that was [MENTION=5723]Tiltyred[/MENTION] ;)
 

Tiltyred

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You know, INFJ female person poster wossname! :D
 
D

Dali

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[MENTION=7063]SilkRoad[/MENTION] [MENTION=5723]Tiltyred[/MENTION] My apologies, ladies. *facepalm*
 

Rasofy

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Unless there is a specific event to link with the face (like oh that's the guy that got the crap beat out of him up a week ago) or the person is unsually good looking, ugly, tall, short or something I probably won't remember...my memory is way too selective when it comes to people. Same with names. Sometimes my ESTJ father informs me ''Did you know X is in hospital?'' where X is a distant relative that I exchange a ''Hey, how are you doing'' once a semester. Now I barely say anything, in order to avoid ''WTF? HE IS FAMILY. HOW INCONSIDERATE OF YOU. WHEN YOU WERE ONLY 5 YEARS HE HELPED US SO MUCH, HOW CAN YOU NOT KNOW HIS NAME?''.
Also, I tend to avoid acquaintances, unless I judge the person can actually be useful. I hate faking I care...way too draining.
 

Silveresque

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I'm terrible with names and faces, mostly because I don't often notice them much. I would have trouble remembering the face of someone I talked to briefly a couple months ago, and there's absolutely no way I'd remember that person's name, unless for some reason it was very important to me. Most of the time I don't really pay attention to other people around me, so I wouldn't even be able to recognize half the people who live on the same floor as me in my dorm. I wouldn't even recognize the girl who lives across the hall from me. And I can only remember the faces of about five people in my Spanish class, which I have everyday. When I was in high school, I could only recognize maybe a few people who rode the same bus as me.

I'm terrible with names too. Somehow names just seem to go in one ear and out the other for me. About a month ago I met a couple people at lunch, and we talked for a bit and they introduced themselves...and almost immediately after I realized I'd missed their names somehow. I was listening and still managed to miss it...How does that happen? :( The same thing happens when I watch movies too. Often I don't learn the protagonist's name until half-way through the movie.

I have a very good memory of places though. I still have mental maps of places I went to years ago. And I can remember the exact spot I sat in at a restaurant I went to three years ago. I don't think I've ever been lost before because I always know where I am and how to get back where I came from.
 

Inverness

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I'm really good with faces, and much less so with names. About the face side of this, I basically don't forget faces...even after a VERY long time...even if it's just someone walking past me. Just the other day I was at a party-like event with only one other person I know, this party is a couple hours from where I live. At some point, I pass a man and I get the 'I know this person' vibe, and I ask my friend I'm with, where do I recognize this person (he knew most people there). And at first he was taken aback and asked in disbelief...'you don't recognize him!?'. My friend then tells me he works for my university's campus maintenance every once in a while. So I've probably seen him, once. During the rest of the evening, it happened again with someone else, and he thought I had to be pulling his leg...as I was right again.

While I get these 'vibes' frequently, usually they're not so close to each other. But I've yet to find anyone, besides my father, who has this happen to them this much as I. It's pretty fun, sometimes it's worth asking the person (without being too creepy :p) to figure it out. Faces and places are probably what I'm best at. If I've been someone once...even just in passing...and I see a picture of it way out of context, I'll be able to remember it instantly.
 

alcea rosea

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I'm also good with faces, bad with names. I do remember most people that I've met, at least for some time but I don't recognize most people after 10 years of so after meeting them. So, I'm not too good in recognizing people after they've changed, are getting older etc. When seeing people in the right context (the place/situation I've seen/met them before) definitely helps.

I'm also very poor in noticing people. Because when I'm out walking, in the city, at shopping centers and so on, I don't watch people, but I concentrate on the thing "I'm doing". So, I wouldn't necessarily even notice my friends when at city because of my lack of attention to the people around me at that point. But when I'm looking/observig/meeting people, I tend to remember the faces of the people I've met. Mostly anyway.
 

Randomnity

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Typically, I can remember most people who I have been introduced to, or interacted with, in a way that indicates to me that we are "more than just strangers". I'm not good with names (not bad with them..) but I typically can remember peoples faces...where I saw that face before...etc etc.

I go to an isolated campus with 20k or so students. I would say that out of every 15-20 random faces, I can recognize at least one face..and realize why I recognize it (Where I saw them..or see them frequently) That is just over 1000 people..or faces, that I have "profiled".

Out of these 1000 faces..I only know like maybe 10 of them intimately enough to actually go up to talk to. (A limitation I put on myself lol)

But I "know" 990 other faces.

What I find funny is every time I see one of the 990 faces..I try to make eye contact, and they typically don't comply. For example..a friend of mine once briefly introduced me to a piano major..and she played the piano for us once (around 8 months ago). It was the only time I've ever interacted with her (and it was like maybe 10 minutes of total reaction)...and I just saw her again...and I tried to make eye contact with her..and nothing..

I've always just assumed that people like that were just too busy to look up and see my face, that if she were to look up she would instantly remember me..but maybe, she actually doesn't remember me..or isn't consciously aware that she has interacted with me before.

Is it possible that some people can't remember having talked to you, even if briefly, a couple months/years ago?

To me, that seems strange...how could you forget?

(Or perhaps they just don't want to talk to me...so they pretend not to see me, when they do...I hope people aren't that mean lol)
Oh, you're one of those people. Staring at strangers. :dry:
Terrible with names and terrible with faces.

It's all about context for me when it comes to those two (when it comes to acquaintances). Anthony from my floor at the office building, who I run into and nod at every other weekday could be very easily ignored and go 'unrecognised' should I run into him at the club/mall/etc. Anthony would recognise me and walk over to say hi and I'd know that I knew him but, more often than not, I wouldn't be able to place where I knew him from and how I did. I've lost count of the number of times I've bs'd my way through entire conversations with people, never knowing 'who' they were.


EDIT: And just noticed that [MENTION=7063]SilkRoad[/MENTION] mentioned the context bit in-between the time I clicked on the thread & posted.

This is me, too. Context very very very important. Even with people I see multiple times a week, it's hard to recognize them without the context. I'm guessing it's partially a mental reminder from the surroundings and partially just your mind subconsciously narrowing down the options ("I know 20 people at work, this guy looks kinda like bob, it must be him!") I don't know why faces are so hard to recognize. Random strangers often look vaguely familiar to me, too. So I end up giving people weird looks sometime trying to figure out if I know them. :dry:
 

wolfy

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I'm okay with names, better in NZ where names were in English. I remember details about people better than I remember names, favourite snack, stuff like that... exercises you are doing in the gym, movies you liked. I remember faces pretty well too most of the time.
 
D

Dali

Guest
Random strangers often look vaguely familiar to me, too. So I end up giving people weird looks sometime trying to figure out if I know them. :dry:

I do that too. Then I wished I hadn't once they give me a similar look and I realise they may know me and think I'm ignoring them/being aloof. LOL
 
R

Riva

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I have quite an issue recalling where I have seen someone before and is often times terrible and recognizing people.

But my ESTP sister has a magical power when remembering people.
A 5 year old actor/actress could make another movie 40 years later, could have a nose job, a face list, facial hair and coloured the hair and she would still recognize him/her.
It is quite remarkable.

Often times we play this game (she plays this game on me), where she recognizes a actor of a movie from another movie and asks me to tell her where i have seen him/her before.
I often fail miserably.
And she often, if not always laughs at me with delight.

Funny how I enjoy that game.
Very uncharacteristic of me.
 
D

Dali

Guest
...my ESTP sister has a magical power when remembering people.
A 5 year old actor/actress could make another movie 40 years later, could have a nose job, a face list, facial hair and coloured the hair and she would still recognize him/her.
It is quite remarkable.

That's my ESTP dad right there. Walks into a roomful of a motley group of people, a few of whom he might have had a chance encounter with years back, and remembers every single one of them along with details about their careers and their families. It's quite enviable, really. I guess that's why people find him so charming and charismatic.
 
R

Riva

Guest
Maybe Se doms and Si doms are good at this?

Clearly ISxPs are not as good as ESxPs are in this recognizing game.
And we don't have enough feedback from ESxJs (as usual) to arrive at a conclusion.
 
D

Dali

Guest
That seems like it. But we may need a larger group of respondents to have a more empirical outcome.

For starters, perhaps our resident ESTJ could share her experience? [MENTION=4945]EJCC[/MENTION] :)
 
R

Riva

Guest
That seems like it. But we may need a larger group of respondents to have a more empirical outcome.

Yes we should hunt and gather more ESxJs to this thread.
I shall call the Germans.
They have legendary people gathering skills.

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