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  1. #1
    Senior Member Silveresque's Avatar
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    Default Existential Loneliness

    Has anyone else experienced it? It's the kind of loneliness that doesn't go away by being with other people. For me, it's the feeling that I have never, and will never, be able to connect with a single human being in any truly meaningful way. It makes friendships and social interactions seem only surface deep, unsatisfying, and ultimately meaningless. I used to think that I felt lonely because I was a recluse and didn't have enough friends, but I've found that even after making more friends and socializing daily, the loneliness hasn't gone away at all.

  2. #2
    resonance entropie's Avatar
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    No it wont ever go away. You have to beware not to at some point give in to your prejudices about the World. You always have to try to start with zero emotions or biases towards every new thing you do or person you meet, if you dont that feeling will eat you one day and you'll become a sarcastic, misanthropic german with 12k posts on an online forum.

    If you dont give up that hope, you may one day meet someone who felt like you do all for her/his life. And tho he/she wont be able to take that bad feeling away from you, together you can make it much much easier to stand.
    [URL]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tEBvftJUwDw&t=0s[/URL]

  3. #3
    Post Human Post Qlip's Avatar
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    Well, I know the existential loneliness. For me, it doesn't go away, but I can mitigate it. Having a certain sort of comfort with myself takes the edge off. The bad feelings from loneliness tend to be intensified by uncertainty and lack of belief in one's self.

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    Senior Member Tiger Owl's Avatar
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    I have experienced existential loneliness. It can go away if you want it to but it may take time and a lot of hard work. What you have to realize is that even though everything is flawed, broken, and temporary which of course makes the whole endeavor appear pointless, there is reason and worth in every aspect of life and relationships. What it sounds like you are describing is a struggle with mild depression. If that is the case, it is a fight worth fighting and it can be won.
    INTJ 5w4 sx/sp 584 ILI-Ni

  5. #5
    Senior Member KDude's Avatar
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    I've been like this all my life. Not much I've been able to do about it. And at this point, I'm not sure I care to try. I'm almost ready to accept my lot, I guess.

  6. #6
    resonance entropie's Avatar
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    It could very well be a natural phaenomena all individuals experience.

    The only alternative could be becoming Borg
    [URL]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tEBvftJUwDw&t=0s[/URL]

  7. #7
    ThatGirl
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    I get this on and off. I go from trying to connect superficially, to getting into my world, to feeling secluded and lonely. Over and over and over. I wish I was just a hard core I, so that at the least, I would stop trying instead of being a masochistic freak.

    It comes from the idea that I think much differently than other people, and the understanding of how those differences shape our individual worlds, until I am at the point, I cant relate to anyone else. When I do connect with other people, unfortunately it is usually through them understanding me, rather than me suddenly understanding them, since I analyze differences and similarities far in advance.

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    Senior Member Eckhart's Avatar
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    Yes, I know it. Actually it gets often worse when around other people, because it makes you just more aware. When alone you can at least sometimes push it away while doing something else.

  9. #9
    Senior Member Silveresque's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Eckhart View Post
    Yes, I know it. Actually it gets often worse when around other people, because it makes you just more aware. When alone you can at least sometimes push it away while doing something else.
    Yeah, same for me. I always wondered why I seem to feel lonelier when I'm with other people than when I'm actually alone.

    I just feel so distant all the time. I see people around me act all bubbly and social and I start thinking, "How do they do that? I could never be like them." And then I start to think about all the things people actually talk about, and I realize it all seems so pointless. A question that comes up all the time is "How was class?" What does it matter? Class is class. It's the same everyday, and yet people still ask everyday. I wonder if people even care to hear the answer, or if they're just asking for the sake of making conversation? Small talk like this is getting very frustrating, and yet I can never seem to get past it.

  10. #10
    Analytical Dreamer Coriolis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by RevlisZero View Post
    Yeah, same for me. I always wondered why I seem to feel lonelier when I'm with other people than when I'm actually alone.

    I just feel so distant all the time. I see people around me act all bubbly and social and I start thinking, "How do they do that? I could never be like them." And then I start to think about all the things people actually talk about, and I realize it all seems so pointless. A question that comes up all the time is "How was class?" What does it matter? Class is class. It's the same everyday, and yet people still ask everyday. I wonder if people even care to hear the answer, or if they're just asking for the sake of making conversation? Small talk like this is getting very frustrating, and yet I can never seem to get past it.
    Same for me as well. The presence of others just highlights the disconnect, plus intrudes on my internal thoughts and reflections, usually in unproductive ways. Your thoughts here mirror mine quite closely. I have learned to treasure the few deep interactions I have, and to keep my own company the rest of the time.
    I've been called a criminal, a terrorist, and a threat to the known universe. But everything you were told is a lie. The truth is, they've taken our freedom, our home, and our future. The time has come for all humanity to take a stand...

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