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  1. #31
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
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    hahaha it's hilarious to me.
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

  2. #32
    RETIRED CzeCze's Avatar
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    I was totally kidding about staring. That was meant to be a joke.
    Because if you actually followed it:

    Quote Originally Posted by Riva View Post
    Yeeeeeah. Pretty much.

    I think looking into the eyes of someone for the first time can be very powerful, like really making contact. It's very effective in those first few seconds to gauge attraction and set a spark. Or to determine wariness, interest, confidence, reservedness/extroversion etc. You can often literally see when your date's expectations have been exceeded, met, or NOT (lolol) by that first look. It sets the tone.

    When I think about my love etc. life, I often remember the first time our eyes met and how it made me feel. Except for my first gf, because she never even turned her head to look at me properly (we were in a group meeting) so she thought I was a white girl until we met each other again. Bah. She was an INFP - TOTAL Se FAIL!
    “If you want to tell people the truth, make them laugh, otherwise they'll kill you.” ― Oscar Wilde

    "I'm outtie 5000" ― Romulux

    Johari/Nohari

  3. #33
    Senior Member Lily flower's Avatar
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    She thought you were a girl? Oh, that is totally something that I would do! (not notice my surroundings to that extent)

  4. #34
    & Badger, Ratty and Toad Mole's Avatar
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    Smile Practice and Spontaneity

    Quote Originally Posted by Coriolis View Post
    Just as conscious attempts to be courteous, friendly, knowledgeable, or helpful are phony as well. Best to be your authentic rude, ignorant, obstructionist self.
    This is actually a good point, for if the aim is spontaneity, we want the aim of spontaneous empathy and creativity, and we don't want spontaneous rudeness, ignorance and obstruction.

    And just as we must practise our scales on the piano before we can play spontaneously, we need to consciously practise empathy and creativity before they become second nature and so spontaneous.

  5. #35
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lily flower View Post
    She thought you were a girl? Oh, that is totally something that I would do! (not notice my surroundings to that extent)
    um...she IS a girl...haha
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

  6. #36
    insert random title here Randomnity's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lily flower View Post
    She thought you were a girl? Oh, that is totally something that I would do! (not notice my surroundings to that extent)
    lol, the wrong adjective is white, not girl.
    -end of thread-

  7. #37
    @.~*virinaĉo*~.@ Totenkindly's Avatar
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    Yes, CzeCze is green. (Didn't anyone notice before? Se fail!)

    RE: Body language... I only use it to express things I already feel. So to me it's not a lie in the least (sorry to those of you who insist on labeling it as manipulative!) -- I was having issues because people were MISREADING my intentions and feelings and commitments to them because I wasn't providing the proper social cues to convey my true intent.

    I mean, really -- I'm INTP, for many years I only lived as a mind and my voice was pretty monotone and very little came out. I actually had to practice as an adult in front of a mirror to teach myself how to smile. (It took me about three weeks to get it right; now it's natural.) INTPs naturally sever the connection between body and emotion/mind in order to maintain balance/neutrality.... but it creates problems for us.
    "Hey Capa -- We're only stardust." ~ "Sunshine"

    “Pleasure to me is wonder—the unexplored, the unexpected, the thing that is hidden and the changeless thing that lurks behind superficial mutability. To trace the remote in the immediate; the eternal in the ephemeral; the past in the present; the infinite in the finite; these are to me the springs of delight and beauty.” ~ H.P. Lovecraft

  8. #38
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    Start with indicators of open/closed body language. Once you establish the person's basic attitude towards you, all the finer details will fall into place eventually.

  9. #39
    Nips away your dignity Fluffywolf's Avatar
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    Rappers may be cool, but walking like them doesn't make you cool.

    @Jennifer, I think the body/mind seperation is more of a problem for female INTP's than it is for us male INTP's.

    I can't smile (I just lift one corner of my mouth), I don't do expressions, my eyes are almost non stop at half past seven in the morning. But it isn't really a problem for me, people say I look calm and stable, manly even! But people have never seen it as negative. But I imagine that doesn't roll if you're a woman, where people almost expect too see vividity. Where lack there off is seen as negative. I'd say women are expected to be chaotic, in a sense. And if that chaos isn't present, something must be wrong with you! :P
    ~Self-depricating Megalomaniacal Superwolf

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