User Tag List

First 12

Results 11 to 18 of 18

  1. #11
    Permabanned
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    MBTI
    xkcd
    Enneagram
    9w1 sx/sp
    Socionics
    INT_
    Posts
    10,733

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Viridian View Post
    In which way? I mean, those qualities are usually associated with the interpersonal realm, not with the intrapersonal one...
    Do you think and behave in the same manner? Obviously no one does exactly (maybe someone with mental issues), we all do some editing of the raw output of our minds.

    A more refined question: do you think and behave in an opposite manner when there is an observer compared to when you are alone?

  2. #12
    Senior Member Viridian's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    MBTI
    IsFJ
    Posts
    3,088

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by MacGuffin View Post
    Do you think and behave in the same manner? Obviously no one does exactly (maybe someone with mental issues), we all do some editing of the raw output of our minds.

    A more refined question: do you think and behave in an opposite manner when there is an observer compared to when you are alone?
    I get a little sillier when I'm alone. I think I get what you mean, though - I try not to be insincere, but I also dislike conflict, especially with people I like. I often refrain from expressing too much criticism... Is that considered "fake"?

    (Sorry if I'm derailing the thread. )

  3. #13
    Permabanned
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    MBTI
    xkcd
    Enneagram
    9w1 sx/sp
    Socionics
    INT_
    Posts
    10,733

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Viridian View Post
    I get a little sillier when I'm alone. I think I get what you mean, though - I try not to be insincere, but I also dislike conflict, especially with people I like. I often refrain from expressing too much criticism... Is that considered "fake"?

    (Sorry if I'm derailing the thread. )
    Seems pretty normal to me.

  4. #14
    Senior Member Jaguar's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Posts
    12,443

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Vasilisa View Post
    He isn't talking about avoiding conflict so much as being driven to be seen as likable and adopting whatever persona makes that easiest.
    Someone once said they would rather be liked, even by people they dislike. Apparently, it was their way of making things "easier." Needless to say, I would never hire them, date them, or befriend them. Why bother - I'd have to scan them with my bullshit meter on a non-stop basis. The same is true of those who run around complimenting people all the time.

    Buffy: Oh, Muffy! Your new dress is sooooo maaaahvelous!
    <air kisses from Buffy to Muffy>

    Muffy: And your new hairdo with the green paint streaks is to die for!
    <air kisses from Muffy to Buffy>



  5. #15
    Don't pet me. JAVO's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Posts
    6,051

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Vasilisa View Post
    Give the whole thing a read when you have time. He isn't talking about avoiding conflict so much as being driven to be seen as likable and adopting whatever persona makes that easiest. And technology sends us near constant messages on how to do just that. People can come to rely on social networking (and other forms) as a mirror on which to project this persona, even regarding a person as just another flattering reflection. Its the technology that makes it new, but even back in 1968 Joan Didon was writing about how the hollow of a lack of real self-respect cannot be filled by others flashy approval. Her essay speaks to me. I just find the reinforcing spinning loop that technology puts on it worth examining. Its basically the antithesis of the power of solitude I posted about earlier this year. And I thought maybe others would find it an interesting perspective as well. And I'm against adding another like button on TypoC.
    This is a great and interesting article, as are the other articles and your own thoughts you've woven into this thread, Vasilisa. I really appreciate your perspective and the many thoughts you've shared on this forum. Because they're more nebulous and abstract and lead to even more of my own branching abstractions, I tend not to respond to them or interact based on them. But, know that my mind is interacting intensely. I suspect there are many others who do the same.

    In my job, I'm often asked to create something using technology. Much of the time, I loathe performing the work because the goal is really just use of technology.

    One aspect of technology is that it is a product, and a product of a consumer culture. Technology has become like a drug, and the technology-focused companies are the pushers. As a result, technology is no longer a means, but has been perversely transplanted as the end. We have become a culture of people pursuing a means, deluded into thinking that it will provide the progress, both as a species and as a person, toward a goal worthy of our pursuit. It is becoming an empty, lifeless culture without a purpose.

  6. #16
    Senior Member Viridian's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    MBTI
    IsFJ
    Posts
    3,088

    Default

    By sheer coincidence, I had to read (for a college class) the introduction of a book by Zygmunt Bauman called Consuming Life, where the author makes many points similar to Franzen's - you might find it interesting, @Vasilisa. The chapter is called "Introduction, or the most closely guarded secret of the society of consumers".

    His focus is more on a consummerist society as one where people are both products and consumers, but he also talks specifically about social networks (it was published when MySpace was popular) and dating websites. Kind of depressing, IMO, but also intriguing from an academic POV.
    Tentative typing: ISFJ 6w5 or 9w1 (Sp/S[?]).

  7. #17
    The Black Knight Domino's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    MBTI
    eNFJ
    Enneagram
    4w3 sx/so
    Socionics
    eNFJ Ni
    Posts
    11,443

    Default

    Very compelling, Vas. Thanks for posting that.
    eNFJ 4w3 sx/so 468 tritype
    Neutral Good
    EII-Fi subtype, Ethical/Empath, Delta/Beta
    RLUEI, Choleric/Melancholic
    Inquistive/Limbic
    AIS Holland code
    Researcher: VDI-P
    Dramatic>Sensitive>Serious

  8. #18
    Member Undeclared's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2011
    MBTI
    INTp
    Posts
    63

    Default

    But if you consider this in human terms, and you imagine a person defined by a desperation to be liked, what do you see? You see a person without integrity, without a center. In more pathological cases, you see a narcissist — a person who can’t tolerate the tarnishing of his or her self-image that not being liked represents, and who therefore either withdraws from human contact or goes to extreme, integrity-sacrificing lengths to be likable.

    If you dedicate your existence to being likable, however, and if you adopt whatever cool persona is necessary to make it happen, it suggests that you’ve despaired of being loved for who you really are.
    This part when I was reading I thought: Well shit..in a sense I try to be liked because I am generally intrigued in someone merely for the purpose of 'learning them.'
    This specific part almost seems out of place with this article, but maybe I'm just misinterpreting it? xD I haven't read the entire thing only the excerpt you posted...

Similar Threads

  1. Dumping one set of beliefs for what appears like more crazy or zany ones?
    By Survive & Stay Free in forum Philosophy and Spirituality
    Replies: 12
    Last Post: 09-26-2013, 06:23 AM
  2. How likely is it for an ENFP to become a doctor?
    By highlander in forum Myers-Briggs and Jungian Cognitive Functions
    Replies: 12
    Last Post: 09-23-2012, 06:34 AM
  3. This one is for those who like RPGs and MMORPGs...
    By IceBlock in forum Myers-Briggs and Jungian Cognitive Functions
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 08-21-2012, 03:10 PM
  4. is this a good career plan (for what i know so far)
    By prplchknz in forum Academics and Careers
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 10-19-2011, 06:04 PM
  5. Replies: 33
    Last Post: 12-01-2007, 02:27 AM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO