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  1. #11
    That's my name biotch! JoSunshine's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SilkRoad View Post
    I'm wondering if she might have borderline personality disorder? I'm not sure if it explains as much as Aspergers, though.
    I don't think so...she is too level, if that makes sense. She is always the same, she does panic and get irritable if things aren't going as planned or if she feels like she someone she likes doesn't like her, but overall she is pretty much always the same. She can also take criticism very well (is almost matter of fact about it) and I think I have only seen her all out loose her temper maybe 3 or 4 times in 7+ years. She is also backs right down when people get upset with her. I have never know to engage in any self-harming activity or threats. That doesn't seem borderline to me although I am no expert
    "Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. " - Dr. Seuss
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  2. #12
    Lay the coin on my tongue SilkRoad's Avatar
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    Yeah, it might be a mix of things. What made me think borderline was the social inappropriateness, glomming onto other people, etc...but then various other things didn't seem to fit, though I am certainly no expert either. It does sound like she needs some assistance though and I hope she can get it. It sounds like it could be quite a lot of stress for you too.
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  3. #13
    (blankpages) Xenon's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by JoSunshine View Post
    I think the thing that really throws me off is that she is very social and has difficulty being alone. From what I have ready one of the hallmarks of Aspergers is avoidance of social situations. She wants to be around people, but she just has poor social skills. Also, she choose a profession that is a people-related field. I was wondering if other people with Asperger's Syndrome also gravitate towards people-related situations.
    From what I've read, what they all tend to have in common is a poor feel for how to relate to people and act in social situations. Some of them become withdrawn as a result of this, because they keep having negative responses from people and don't know why, so they begin to feel awkward or anxious in social situations. Others aren't so aware of how they come across, and end up just rubbing people the wrong way or seeming odd or inappropriate to others and not being aware of this. From what you've described, it sounds like she wasn't aware of how she came across until recently, and now she's starting to worry about it a lot.

    I definitely see more reason to think it's Asperger's than OCD or borderline or any other mental disorder....especially with her being oblivious to it for so long. I have a hard time seeing someone with OCD not knowing something is wrong.


    Quote Originally Posted by JoSunshine View Post
    She spends a good bit of the time feeling "crazy" these days. For a long time she had no idea she was "different" but now that she is aware of it (and knows that people refer to her as "crazy") she is forever wondering what is different about her - especially because she doesn't seem to able to discern from situation to situation what would be "normal". Some days she calls me 10 times in one day to ask how to handle different situations. I also think she feels "unlovable" and that is sad. I'm thinking a diagnosis might help her cope and understand herself.
    Ugh. It does sound like she could use some explanation and some advice. Has she shown any interest in reading up on it, or meeting other people with it? If she reads descriptions and personal accounts herself and identifies with them, that could tell her a lot. She might get some ideas from others about how to cope with her traits and difficulties.

  4. #14
    Senior Member wildcat's Avatar
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    [QUOTE=JoSunshine;1631656]I think the thing that really throws me off is that she is very social and has difficulty being alone. From what I have ready one of the hallmarks of Aspergers is avoidance of social situations. She wants to be around people, but she just has poor social skills. Also, she choose a profession that is a people-related field. I was wondering if other people with Asperger's Syndrome gravitate towards people-related situations.

    Yes, they do.
    I worked in a company where my job was to take care of the foreign guests. PR sector.

    If there are autists who avoid social situations, it is only a reaction from negative reception from the environment. Avoidance is not one of the hallmarks of an AS at all, it is not an inborn trait.
    Your friend is a clear-cut Asperger case.

    You said that she fits in certain ways only. A misinterpretation of Asperger diagnosis.
    According to your own description, she fits in all the ways.

  5. #15
    That's my name biotch! JoSunshine's Avatar
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    Thanks guys for all of your help! I think I will encourage her (and help her) write down a list of all of the things she struggles with and go to a doctor. Hopefully, the doctor will be able to see give her a diagnosis one way or the other. Even though I strongly suspect some sort of Asperger's, I don't feel comfortable saying that because I could be wrong (that's happened once or twice) I will leave the diagnosis to the professionals. I think just having some answers and understanding would really be helpful.

    Once again thank you! Thank you!
    "Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. " - Dr. Seuss
    I can't spell...get over it

    Slightly ENFJ, totally JoSunshine
    Extroverted (E) 52.5%........Introverted (I) 47.5%
    Intuitive (N) 65.63%..........Sensing (S) 34.38%
    Feeling (F) 55.56%............Thinking (T) 44.44%
    Judging (J) 51.43%............Perceiving (P) 48.57%

  6. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by blankpages View Post
    Even if she got a professional diagnosis, I'm not sure what they can do for her. There's no specific treatment. If she's been feeling bad about her social problems, it might be a relief to be able to point to a reason for them. I'm not sure what else can be done, especially if she's just being diagnosed as an adult.
    If she wants help and has the funds, there are resources available to improve her quality of life. She needs to find a team of specialists that work exclusively with developmental disorders.

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