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  1. #1
    & Badger, Ratty and Toad Mole's Avatar
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    Smile Praise and Insults

    Insults are bad but praise is worse, for praise feels good and I want to repeat the feeling. So I try to repeat what I have written. And this is fatal, for then I am writing a copy - dead prose - in the hope of praise.

    Praise is as seductive as honey and leads me by the nose into a nosedive.

    The road to hell, they tell me, is paved with good intentions; and the road to dullness is littered with praise.

    The first thing I had to learn on the internet was to be insulted by perfect strangers, and the second thing was to be poisoned by their praise.

    At times I fool myself and tell myself I am relying on the kindness of strangers, when I should heed my mother's words and beware of stranger danger.

  2. #2
    @.~*virinaĉo*~.@ Totenkindly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Victor View Post
    Insults are bad but praise is worse, for praise feels good and I want to repeat the feeling. So I try to repeat what I have written. And this is fatal, for then I am writing a copy - dead prose - in the hope of praise.

    Praise is as seductive as honey and leads me by the nose into a nosedive.

    The road to hell, they tell me, is paved with good intentions; and the road to dullness is littered with praise.

    The first thing I had to learn on the internet was to be insulted by perfect strangers, and the second thing was to be poisoned by their praise.

    At times I fool myself and tell myself I am relying on the kindness of strangers, when I should heed my mother's words and beware of stranger danger.
    Actually, from what you've written, the fault lies not in the stranger's praise for your efforts but instead in your attempts to recreate the behavior that the stranger praised in order to receive ongoing strokes.
    "Hey Capa -- We're only stardust." ~ "Sunshine"

    “Pleasure to me is wonder—the unexplored, the unexpected, the thing that is hidden and the changeless thing that lurks behind superficial mutability. To trace the remote in the immediate; the eternal in the ephemeral; the past in the present; the infinite in the finite; these are to me the springs of delight and beauty.” ~ H.P. Lovecraft

  3. #3
    Oberon
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    Quote Originally Posted by Victor View Post
    The road to hell, they tell me, is paved with good intentions; and the road to dullness is littered with praise.
    You're correct, Victor. Perhaps the road to happiness, then, is so hard to find because it is fogged with ambiguity?

    I can't tell you how much I appreciate you starting this thread.

  4. #4
    Senior Member King sns's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Victor View Post
    Insults are bad but praise is worse, for praise feels good and I want to repeat the feeling. So I try to repeat what I have written. And this is fatal, for then I am writing a copy - dead prose - in the hope of praise.

    Praise is as seductive as honey and leads me by the nose into a nosedive.

    The road to hell, they tell me, is paved with good intentions; and the road to dullness is littered with praise.

    The first thing I had to learn on the internet was to be insulted by perfect strangers, and the second thing was to be poisoned by their praise.

    At times I fool myself and tell myself I am relying on the kindness of strangers, when I should heed my mother's words and beware of stranger danger.
    As your friend, I'm going to have to tell you that this OP sucks and you're going to have to continue to strive for a better OP. I am not challenged. I am not enthused.

    (There, how's that? Does that help?)
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  5. #5
    Listening Oaky's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Victor View Post
    Insults are bad but praise is worse, for praise feels good and I want to repeat the feeling. So I try to repeat what I have written. And this is fatal, for then I am writing a copy - dead prose - in the hope of praise.
    What if someone is praised for their ability to be able to continuously bring about something new. Will this not push them further to always bring about something new?

  6. #6
    Analytical Dreamer Coriolis's Avatar
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    Develop a sound understanding of who you are, and you will neither need anyone's praise, nor be bothered by anyone's insults.
    I've been called a criminal, a terrorist, and a threat to the known universe. But everything you were told is a lie. The truth is, they've taken our freedom, our home, and our future. The time has come for all humanity to take a stand...

  7. #7
    ThatGirl
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    Quote Originally Posted by Oakysage View Post
    What if someone is praised for their ability to be able to continuously bring about something new. Will this not push them further to always bring about something new?
    You should probably note that new doesn't always equal improvement.

  8. #8
    & Badger, Ratty and Toad Mole's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jennifer View Post
    Actually, from what you've written, the fault lies not in the stranger's praise for your efforts but instead in your attempts to recreate the behavior that the stranger praised in order to receive ongoing strokes.
    Yes it's true, I am like a cat, on being stroked, looks for more.

    And who can blame me? Who doesn't love being praised? And after all, even God only wants our praise. Surely I can't do any better than God.

    And yet at it's heart, if I accept your praise, I must accept your blame. In other words, if I accept your praise or blame, I am accepting your control. And if there is anything I resist, it is control.

    So when I write to you, I am inherently taking a risk. And I am risking your praise or your blame. To be free I must give up trying to control whether you blame or praise me. And hey, that's a bit scary.

    So not being able or willing to depend on external praise or blame, I can only look into myself for orientation.

  9. #9
    & Badger, Ratty and Toad Mole's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ThatGirl View Post
    You should probably note that new doesn't always equal improvement.
    It's true, the new needs to be analysed, evaluated and integrated. The new needs to be analysed to be understood; and the new needs to be evaluated to see if it is any good; and finally, if it is any good, it needs to the be integrated into what we already know to be good.

    However without something new, we have nothing to analyse, evaluate and integrate.

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by Coriolis View Post
    Develop a sound understanding of who you are, and you will neither need anyone's praise, nor be bothered by anyone's insults.
    Yes, I am caught between two needs. My need to be free and independent and my need for intimacy. Both needs are good but both needs are not always compatible.

    We all look for utopia where all our needs are compatible and satisfied. But utopia means nowhere. So nowhere are there entirely compatible needs. To satisfy one need necessarily means another goes wanting.

    At Easter it might be appropriate to say that we are crucified between two competing needs, nailed to each hand, pulling us apart and eventually suffocating us.

    This is the human condition, far too much to bear, so we look forward in hope to the resurrection where all contradictions will be resolved.

    For the Lord of the Dance, click on -

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FxqdATYOpIM

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